Help my 12 year old son?

Question

My son has a problem with masturbating in public. I never was a big masturbater so I don't know what to do about doing it in public.

Well he knows he shouldn't do it in public but he does it unconciously.

Reading the bible won't help because my son is an athiest.

Answer 1

Of course, have a discussion with your son. Be open and use the correct words for things. Let him know that you understand what he's doing is normal. You MAY be comfortable saying that sometimes you do it, too.

HOWEVER, it is something that one does in the privacy of their own bedroom, not in public.

12 years old and pre-pubescent is about average these days for self discovery, sexuality, hormone rushes, etc. He's going through a completely normal development process and he needs to know that its ok to masturbate.

But what he needs to be aware of is that its just not ok to do it in public. Explain to him that when there are younger kids present, perhaps they don't know what he's doing and he may frighten them because they'll be unsure/scared. And explain that other people can be/are uncomfortable with that type of behavior happening in a public setting. This is why anything to do with genetaila is done in private. From cleaning, to exploring/examining, to masturbation.

Its ok for him to do this, yes. But its not ok to do in public. And that has to be the root of the conversation.

The trick is to not make your son ashamed or embarassed of his sexuality. Its a fine line to walk, but I think with some finesse, you should be able to say "Its Ok, but do it at home!" without making him (or you!) too upset. :-) Good luck

Answer 2

Answer number one covers the basic answer to this question but I wanted to add something to it.

I do agree that healthy sexuality is important.

However, if a 12 year old is doing this in public then he might need to see a counselor. This isn't typical behavior. You might have the talk with him suggested in answer 1 and offer him the option of seeing a counselor, not because it is wrong, but if he feels he can't control it in public. This can motivate him to do it in private. If he continues then I say he needs some additional help. There are reduced fee and free counselors available.

Here are some websites on the topic:
(you can go to Edit and then find, type in public to get to relevant part of webpage)
http://www.abc.net.au/rn/talks/8.30/helthrpt/stories/s11325.htm
http://www.scotland.gov.uk/library2/doc02/hhgs-06.htm
http://www.jigsaw.org.nz/hot_has.html
http://www.health24.com/teens/Your_body/735-1433-1435,16124.asp

Graduated with a B.S. in Psychology.

Answer 3

As a minister, I work with young people of all ages from 11 until 21 and one thing I try to encourage them to do while being single is to find constructive things that will help them and take their minds off of sex. The more a boy or girl thinks about sex them more they will want to masturbate. Having said that when they do masturbate it's because they are thinking about someone they know, sometimes a girl at school, sometimes while sick their mother or father (for Girls) I have heard of them even thinking about siblings, it doesn't matter who they think about, doing so is a sin, it's lust and one of the Ten Commandments is thou shalt not committ adultery. Pray, Read your bible, talk to your youth pastor or Pastor, have your son talk to a counselor, Just get his young mind off sex and on things that will help in his development from boy to man. God Bless.

Answer 4

do no longer block the positioning. Your son is probable purely beginning to boost and detect a thank you to make himself sense good (aka an orgasm). besides the certainty that this concept is probable repulsive as his verify, that's thoroughly organic and turning your back to that's going to enable him to boost to adulthood on his very own. Confronting him or blockading the positioning might embarrass him and lead him to have faith that masturbation is something incorrect and it maximum certainly isn't.

Answer 5

well that"s a touchy subject becasuse you dont want him to think its a bad thing to in touch with yourself or better yet love ur self . i think you should have a long talk with him and maybe have the talk about his body and how certain things you shouln't do in public

Answer 6

He is going to get in trouble with the police. You need to stop him.

Answer 7

unconciously? how is he doing it unconciously? you better have him tested for mental problems. that don't sound right.......