Should I keep on having an affair with my lover even though I am married?

Question

It relaxes me and make me happier so things are better with my husband...I don't want to leave him I just don't want to lose my lover either. It's just that my husband doesn't make me happy sexually and doesn't know what to say or do to make me feel good...and by me seeing someone else I don't annoy him with my demand for attention...I don't bother him and just let him ignore me and seek me when he wants water a blanket or some food or ironed clothes....doesn't it sound fair?

Answer 1

How would you feel if your husband is doing to you what you're doing to him? chances are your lover is using you and has other women on the side...drop him like a bag of hot potatoes and try to work on your mariage---try individual and couple therapy if you fill something is missing in your mariage and try to get to the bottom of whatever it is that you think your husband lacks but your lover possess.

Answer 2

Infidelity is morally wrong. If you feel that your husband doesn't make you happy or fullfill your sexual needs, then discuss it with him and try marriage counseling. If your complaints go on deaf ears, or he refuses to go to marriage counseling then file for divorce. I cannot condone you having an affair with someone. What you are trying to do is have your cake and eat it too. Come down from your Cloud 9 and return to the real world, You are a married woman. If you don't love your husband anymore, get a divorce. Let us see if your lover is waiting on the white horse to sweep you away if you do leave your husband...Never happen. He'll be scared away in a NY minute.

Answer 3

Your going to be divorced sometime soon.
Your finished and you don't know it!
I once new a woman like you her husband beat her so bad she in a wheelchair now, and she has no choice but to stay with him now and he hit's her all the time!

My wife and I call the police and they come she never presses s charges and when we ask why , she says it was her fault for having the affair in the first place, and her husband is her only scource of income .
Shes stuck. Remember that next time you lay up with that man, You might be stuck or shot or stabbed or hatted!
Is the sex worth it?
If I were your husband and you acted liked that you would be divorce without anything and I would not stop until you were humiliated and had nothing to your name!
Mistakes happen but your doing this for no together reason then you want your cake and eat it to.

Answer 4

You are Married! Do your marriage vows mean nothing to you?
Show your husband what you like (in a sexy way) or trying having sex with him they same way you and your lover do. If it's flirting all day by phone text messaging, meet 4 dinner and then sex. Set it up with your husband and flirt with him the same way you did before you got married. From the sound of it he probably isn't feeling too good about himself as a Man pleasing his wife. Men have feelings too. Fix it ! It is wrong to betray your husband and may lead to a broken trust that can never be built up again.

Answer 5

Fair hardly....you mean you really had to ask this question?

I say get a divorce- why stop your husband from finding someone that makes him happy all around?

Since we all know that you have moved on to make only yourself happy, let him be happy too. Don't be selfish. You both have probably grown as people anyway, just one of you in a more honest way than the other.

Answer 6

No, you should not continue your affair. You are being cowardly and avoiding the emotional issues at hand in your marriage - talk to your husband and let him know how he can satisfy you sexually. Explain to him how you would like him to meet your emotional needs, and ask him how best you can meet his. Because chances are, neither of you are happy. You're going through the motions of a happy marriage, keeping up appearances. This is not fair to either of you, and will make you BOTH feel wretched in the long term. I hope you find the courage to be true to yourself and him.

Answer 7

What makes you think your husband doesn't have a lover?
Those certain mornings he's going to work early or he really does have to work late and lets not forget the weekends he's just out running errands right? Or...... have you noticed someone following you....probably not, you know the guy taking pictures of your affair I'm sure no one knows.......

Answer 8

Come on now you knew all about this man before you married him but you married him anyway. I'm not trying to judge you or anytihng but you are totally wrong with what you are doing. What if the shoe was on the other foot? Besides you are making yourself look kind of like a whore by sleeping with a man outside of the realtionship. Did it ever cross your mind that the man on the side doesn't really respect you and kinda treats you like a side whore. I think that you should end that side relationship or at least tell your husband that you are no longer in love with him. Come to think about it there are plenty of ways that you could have solved the issues in your relationship without seeking sex outside of it. You could have tried to spice things up in the bedroom with your man first before sleeping with someone else. I don;t wish anyting bad on you but what goes around comes around.

Answer 9

You are seriously fooling yourself. No one else. I don't find it fair that you are playing your husband wrong. If he doesn't satisfy you in bed there are ways to let him know what you like. There is counseling and there are books that can help you spice up your sex life. You shouldn't even be married. You should have stayed single that way whenever you meet someone that doesn't satisfy you, you could proceed on to the next without any commitment.

Answer 10

If you think it sounds so "right', why are you even asking others for advice? You can't have both (husband & lover) & be comfortable with the situation as it is...you are just looking for someone else to justify your actions so you don't have to make a responsible decision....one only you can make, really!