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I believe that our childhood experiences shape our beliefs and personalities by affecting our personal sense of safety first and then getting approval. It seems that those around us who influence us are most responsible for our feelings of safety and security. Their ideas of right and wrong, what gets us approval, become the beliefs that we live by. Our norms are based on this information. This doesn't mean that our norms match those of others or society. If we get positive reinforcement for certain things then those become "the right way" of doing things. As we get older we continue to gauge the "right and wrongs" according to the old beliefs we developed. Any new experience is evaluated by those old rules. If those old rules are challenged they may cause a lot of discomfort, especially when they are in conflict with laws or norms for the larger social environment. I think that as adults, we re-evaluate our beliefs regularly and change them based on the "rewards" we receive. We may let go of old ideas and develop new ones. I think personality reflects our beliefs to others. The way we behave is based on what we believe to be true.

2007-03-11 08:20:08 · answer #1 · answered by Kathleen B 2 · 0 0

Freud said that a child's personality is pretty much shaped for life by the time they are 5. Not saying that they cannot be changed, but it is more difficult, because the foundation that is laid within those five years affects who they are for the rest of their lives. Now think about that, we usually can't remember many experiences up to that age, so this is all stored into our subconscous. The memories are still there, we just can't recall them. So if we are not able to recall them, we are not able to identify the problem, and work to fix it. We can't remember the things we experienced, so all we are left with is the emotions, and fears that these experiences brought on. If our childhood was great, then most likely we will not have many underlying problems that we cannot face as adults. But if our childhood was full of abuse, neglect, or if our parents were just angry and yelled all the time, we are left with the emotions these experiences brought on, even though we cannot remember the experiences themselves. It is harder to overcome a problem when you don't remember what caused the emotions you are feeling in the first place. An example is my stepdaughter. She is 4, but she came to live with us at age 2. She had a bad homelife with her mother. Right now, she does not remember her mother at all, or anything she experienced over there, she actually beleives that she came from my tummy, because I am the only mother she remembers. But she has extreme fear of abandonment, fear of somebody beating her when she gets in trouble, and she gets very emotional over small things, and bursts into tears. It is very difficult to help her, because I don't know what happened to her, and neither does she, she cannot communicate it to me because she does not remember. All we can do is show her the good life she has now, and love her as much as possible. I don't know if she will be dealing with these fears for the rest of her life, but I hope not. I know it has majorly shaped who she is now. But yes, I beleive a person's childhood does shape our beleifs and personalities. As adults of course, we can overcome this, and be whoever we want to be. We ultimately have the power to make any choice we want to, and be whoever we want to be.But how you were raised definitely plays a big part in how easy that is for us.

2007-03-11 08:47:52 · answer #2 · answered by Lindsey H 5 · 0 0

You have asked a question that lies at the heart of most human psychological theory. A complete answer would require most of a master's program.

The short answer would be: by learning.

We don't come into the world with a significant amount of anything in our brains beyond the "pre-programmed" biological functions.

We acquire our beliefs, and develop our personalities through observation and participation. This being said, there also are "inherited" or biological pre dispositions that can come into play regarding certain addictive behaviors or the development of mental illnesses.

As we mature, we can incorporate our experiences, deny them or discard them. Ultimately we have the power to "create" ourselves, regardless of our experiences.

While we often incorporate positive, or healthy experiences with little concern, we focus on the unhealthy, or "dysfunctional" ones and often times blame them for our negative behaviors and unhappiness.

Even if we did experience maltreatment as a child, we can heal from the wounds. This can take effort and be quite challenging depending on the degree of the wound, and in the long run, the work required is worth it.

2007-03-11 08:43:41 · answer #3 · answered by LV-Therapist 3 · 0 0

When 8 yrs old, I had 5 dolls to bathe, put clean clothes on
that I hand washed, and groomed their hair. It struck me,
if all five were real, and their father died or we got divorced,
I did not think I could take good care of more than two.
Since that age, I've upheld my decision not to have more
than two children under any circumstance.

When age 6, I took a ghastly beating with a belt when an adult
did not respond to an urgent summons I had conveyed.
I could not point my finger to blame the adult nor understand
their omission of facts. A month of nightmares passed, and
the truth revealed itself. An apology is golden words as should
be the acceptancy: "There was nothing to forgive. I love you
always." To blame or condemn one, is like earning 10 bad
merits, but having patience for Truth to show gets a good one.
Now an adult, I will expedite mending personal attacks of my
honor with insight of how it took too long the day of the belt.
Peolple who cannot apologize score very low with me.

2007-03-11 09:28:00 · answer #4 · answered by LuckyLilTroll2U 4 · 0 0

trauma is one of them.
Most of the time, it's that person's family and friends, also the environment, he/ she came from that shapes current beliefs and personalities.
I can say that his/ her parents are top contributors.

2007-03-11 08:07:58 · answer #5 · answered by xjenx3 2 · 0 0

I enjoyed church Linz. i grew to become into horrified on the sexism, homophobia etc. that I witnessed at domicile and in church, yet i grew to become into additionally specific it would make sense or be shown incorrect if I studied the Bible sufficient. the two way, i grew to become into specific it would artwork out. So I studied the Bible and interned with my church's babies minister. I even went away to a Baptist convention center to artwork with in straight forward terms different conservative Christians for a summer time. That and my college preparation confirmed me purely how pretend the religion i grew to become into raised in grew to become into. i grew to become into upset. I had was hoping to be Christian constantly and make my kinfolk proud. in certainty, when I left Christianity i grew to become into in a hurry to interchange it with yet another faith probable because of the fact I cherished it lots and were taught that my existence may be a horror of emptiness without it. I grew to alter into Pagan and saved gaining knowledge of approximately comparative faith, historic previous etc. I enjoyed such matters immensely. i grew to become into in touch interior the Pagan community. lots of those persons are nevertheless good acquaintances of mine. It grew to become into years later that i eventually have been given genuine and admitted that i could no longer have faith that crap anymore and that i did no longer might desire to. there grew to become into no super trauma. i'm anti-faith because of the fact I observed all of the little techniques that the fantasy erodes a individual's skill to reason and a society's skill to appreciate circumstances needless to say and use compassion in dealing with one yet another. temporarily, I hate lies and love the certainty because of the character of those issues, no longer because of the fact i grew to become into maltreated as a baby.

2016-10-18 03:04:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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