I shamely had an affair with my married boss, please no criticism.... I feel terrible.The problem is we fell in love with eachother. I ache inside for him, he says he is in love with me still as I am to him, but we have ended the affair. I need honest advice, his wife suspects the affair, and knows he fell out of love with her. We talk once a week and the feelings are not going away. Will he be able to fall back in love with his wife again after this? Will I be able to get over him, since we see eachother every day? If it were up to me we would be together, but I know how hard it is for him to hurt someone else like that....no kids involved... need real heartfelt advice. I am deeply in love with him.
2007-03-11 06:13:17 · 23 answers · asked by Tigerous 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think if he truly loved you, and especially if there are no kids involved, then he would leave his wife for you. If he hasn't mentioned doing this any time soon, then chances are, he wants the best of both worlds. I think the only alternative is for you to look for another place to work.
Also, criticism or no, if you knew he was married in the first place, what did you think was going to happen before you ever began the relationship?
2007-03-11 06:19:14 · answer #1 · answered by ♫ frosty ♫ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, that's great. So lets say he leaves his wife for you and the two of you walk happily into the sunset together. What's to stop him from getting bored again doing the same thing to you that he did his wife? This dude obviously has NO respect for his wife or his marriage and neither do you apparently, hey do what you gotta do, but why on earth would you fall in love with him? Do you honestly believe he loves you back? I'm sure he loved his wife at some point and he's screwing YOU behind HER back. If you can't see how lame that is, then you deserve each other.
2007-03-11 06:27:06 · answer #2 · answered by mixedup 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how long did this affair take place? but to be honest apparently there is still something there for his wife because he hasn't left her. take some advice from an old fool. It might sound harsh but it is meant with all honesty....If he will cheat with you ..........he will cheat on you. There is always going to be someone more beautiful and more charming and more susceptible to be just what he is looking for at the moment. not saying that he is a bad man or a dog or anything but apparently he is not capable of being committed to only one person. Ask yourself if you were to become seriously involved with him would you truly be able to trust him or in the back of your mind would you keep thinking of how you got together. My grandmother use to say that same way he got you he will leave you so if he cheated with you then the chances of him cheating on you are great. find a single man who will love you and only you and not one that you have to share. a split heart is not true love.
2007-03-11 06:21:10 · answer #3 · answered by cuRiOuS 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he loves you as you do him then both of you need to divorce your spouses and get together. The only decent way for this affair to end is for you to move on, get another job, have NO contact with him at all. To continue to work for him and see him daily is just making things hard on both you and whether it is lust or love, doesn't matter, the need will eventually over rule the good intentions. An affair is wrong anyway you look at it, it is unfair to your spouses, they too have a right to be happy, let them go before you two destroy what dignity they have
2007-03-11 06:26:06 · answer #4 · answered by sassywv 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its time to end it. Think --- if he wanted to end his marriage it would have been done by now. Divorce is a hard thing to do when there are financial burdens such as alimony. Could be this man refuses to leave because of this...just know married men dont ever leave their wives no matter who they say they are in love with in the end its all about money. If you really need to be truly happy move on it will hurt for a bit but you will find someone that will give you true happiness and love that you deserve. Good luck to you.
2007-03-11 06:25:11 · answer #5 · answered by memyslf&I 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are deeply in love with him because he is already taken.
Let me take you through some real stuff.his wife is the one who wakes up to his unwashed face the signs of late night drooling,his bad breathe in the morning,the unpleasant smell in the bathroom after he has been in there and the way he scratches himself like an ape.
So you see,After She has fixed him up you get to see the end product without having to work on it.This goes for men too.
Why don't you find your own man and turn him into some other woman's boss and see how fast another woman lays down for him because she is in love.And by the way.How do you know he fell out of love with his wife?oh yes he must have told you that, what would you do with such a man when you finally get him and then he falls out of love with you.
2007-03-11 06:44:20 · answer #6 · answered by miraclehand2020 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wont be any harder for him to hurt her than it will be for him to hurt you either by "falling in love with his wife again" or dumping you for something better.No matter what a person says about their marriage STAY out of it until AFTER they have been divorced a yr or so and have had time to heal,get their life straightened out etc.The problem is you only thought of yourself.If you had any morals, you would not have netered into another woman's relationship after her man had made vows to her.The guy has proven how seriously he took his vows with his wife.He will take them the SAME way with you.You say your deeply in love with a 2 timer?Is this what you want to be married to?Use your head not your emotions and do whats right,dump him yesterday and find a single man.
2007-03-11 06:20:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, so we all make mistakes. It is not the crime of the century. Having affairs is not a new thing. Neither is believing this person is your one and only.
Back off, don't talk to him. He has to sort out his own life and make his own decisions. Take control of your own emotional life and get some perspective on the situation.
We always think "How did this happen?" But we know exactly how we got into the situation. Own it. Only you are responsible for your heart ache. Only you can pull yourself out of it.
2007-03-11 06:20:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well,i dont know exactly what to tell u.i honestly am sorta in that situation too?but this is from my point of view?some people would call u a home wrecker,and all that but i say if he is directing his attention towards u thats not ur fault?u know?ur not puttin a gun to his head and sayin do this and do that.maybe in the end if u still keep in touch or continue with him,both of u might see that ur right for each other?just becuz u get married dont mean u have to be with that person till u die,the point of life as i see it is,to be happy.if u get in a situation thats makes u unhappy,get away and get happy again.who knows him and his wife might be goin thru things,or she might be doin the same thing?and obviously he's not happy or else he wouldnt be wantin ta spend time with u?well,im always here if u wanna talk?hustlebunny216@yahoo.com
2007-03-11 06:25:45 · answer #9 · answered by **so lost** 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is easy to fall for a married man, some time in most womens life it has been done. Sometimes its the buzz of being the other women. But in your case, you really do love him, its not easy, there is nothing you can do, but get on with your life, try and be strong not easy, but the stronger you make yourself the quicker you will move on with your life, and who knows one day, he might get in contact, and if you are still single, you may be able to try again, but for the time being, make yourself the stronger person, it will make you feel so much better in yourself, don't let yourself go, carry on looking good, who knows. Good-luck. My heart goes out to you..... R
2007-03-11 06:32:21 · answer #10 · answered by Raksha L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋