We where highschool sweetys and dated for 5 years .Then we married and 1o years later and two young boys she started an affair at her work. She wanted to be with him so I had no chioce but to divorce. I told her that I would have done anything in the world and that nobody will ever love her as much as I do. But it didn't help. She told me that she had fallen out of love with me last year and that really hurt. I was a good husband and father and everybody was shocked. Do you think in time that she might realize what she lost? And regain feelings? Its been 3 months since we seperated and she is still with her coworker. I'm moving on and call me a glutten for punishment but I still love her sooo much.
2007-03-11 04:59:11 · 22 answers · asked by The best I can do 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Forget the bicth....
2007-03-11 05:01:36 · answer #1 · answered by Dusty 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You are a very good person and unfortunately my mother was a cheater and she did it multiple times to my father who was like you a great dad and husband... I think it's a lifetime thing... I do not beleive she will ever change...my mother is still doing this to this day...It is very selfish...you have to move on and find someone who will treat you well...if not for you then think about your kids if you get your ex back alll they will see is a bad relationship and they will probably have the same heartaches as you when they are adults...be strong for those kids find a healthy relationship so they have a chance at one too! Your a good guy and you will find someone...how about church or single parent groups or the library...just when you least expect it you will meet someone!!!I promise!Chin Up! for the kids!
2007-03-11 12:11:20 · answer #2 · answered by Jennifer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
With any luck on your side the little cheating slu,t will stay out of your life and you will get a better woman but for now you haven't seen what a truly beautiful woman looks like . Your still fantasizing on that old stinky cun,t some guy is putting his rod in . Get a life before its to late you never know you could get run over by a bus tomorrow
2007-03-11 12:22:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one is going to punish you, Mr., I actually think it is pretty normal what you are going through now, and I am sorry you have gone through it too.
No body deserves such heart-breaking events.
Now, I won't ask you to stop loving her, obviously she was your first love, and first love is impossible to get over with. However, as much as I want you to focus on yourself and try to get balance in your life, you have two little boys that you have to think about to. Don't go very deep in your sadness, or your kids will be strongly affected by what happened, and I believe they are already, but you can cut the loss and make it up for them. Don't destroy their mother's image in their mind. Be the better person.
As for your wife, one day she will realize what she did and she will regret what she have lost, it might take longer time, but she will eventually. I don't care about her.
Take care of yourself and be your children's world. Do what you have to do, and let time heal your broken heart, maybe with someone else.
2007-03-11 12:12:41 · answer #4 · answered by peachy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know you are hurt, but you are holding on to only a possiblity when in fact this probably wont be a reality for you. You need to move on, but before you do, you might want to get some couseling. It sounds like your self-esteem is just destroyed and you need to build that up before starting over with anyone. I am sorry to hear about your situation. Nothing heals a broken heart except for time. Give yourself as much as you need.
2007-03-11 12:06:07 · answer #5 · answered by mlock123 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This same thing happened to me with my ex. We had 2 boys also. But when he cheated on me he also got a new baby out of the deal. we were married for 16 yrs. I also thought like you that I wud do anything for him, even look the other way { the affair} I thought I cud forget about it, I may of forgave him but never forgot.We tried to make it work but It was always in the back of my head that he cheated on me. Sure in time she may realize what she lost, but are you willing to settle for someone who cheated on you? You deserve better that that. You will realize that urself in time. Don't settle for anything less than u deserve. My ex after being divorced since 1997. Has just recently called me saying he shud of never gave me up. People learn thing's in different times and ways. Yes urself esteem has been bruised, but hang in there. I'm living proof that you can make it!! Foucus on ur sons that's what I did. I never spoke ill of their dad and they r very close to me. They are grown now. I let them make up their own mind about their dad, and not have my judgement of him cloud their minds.
2007-03-11 12:25:51 · answer #6 · answered by cindy j 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A good friend once told me "The only thing good reheated is stuffed cabbage." For her as well as for you.
And hon, sorry, you don't love her, you love the IMAGE you have of her, and they just aren't the same. Two years from now you will for sure see that. In the meantime, begin to accept that fact, and the sooner, the better for your mental health.
2007-03-11 13:02:49 · answer #7 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This happened to me after 20 years of marriage. My ex even had the nerve to bring his slut to our church 2 months before the separation. Move on with your life and hold your head high. Cheaters arent worth the time it takes to type this.
2007-03-11 12:14:21 · answer #8 · answered by ncgirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes she will come back in time, so if u want to wait on her, its up to u. she won't find love, not the real love she seeks, because she already had it and walked out on it. this new love is probably only lust, last a short time, so if she found fault with u and fell out of love she will do him the same way or he will do it to her. takes alot more than loving someone to make a marriage work. u don't want to be a doormat either. seems as if u and her have too much of a past to just forget it, she will come back, u can count on that, the minute he doesn't give her the same things as u gave her. she will see who loves her than.
2007-03-11 12:07:01 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Write her off. Any woman who would do that to her husband and kids isnt worth keeping.Theres plenty of women out there who want a good man.The guy she is with now has no morals or else he wouldnt have went after another man's wife.Sue him and her for emotional trauma to you and your kids.Then be really picky when it comes to women.
2007-03-11 12:06:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
sorry 4 your pain this happened to me actually i am the one who left after 20 yrs and 3 sons my suggestion is to take life one day at a time and slowly make a new life 4 yourself it may turn out better then u think
2007-03-11 12:15:00 · answer #11 · answered by tasks mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋