How do you deal with relatives annoying, spoiled, and complaing children with out being a *****?

Answer 1

This is definately a no win situation as any critisism of their little darlings will end up causing grief.
Try meeting up without the kids every once in a while to give you breathing space and when they have to be there just thank God they don't belong to you.....

Answer 2

Very delicately and only approach it once.

Let's assume you care about your relatives and their spoiled child.

Once, and once only, you set up a time to have the parents (or parent if you feel more comfortable with one) over for dinner, coffe, whatever. You RESPECTFULLY tell them your concerns. You do not blame them or the child for anything. Use "I" statements. "I find it very difficult to know how to respond when little Timmy is demanding I give him candy and am unsure what to do when my refusal pushes him into a tantrum." Give as many specific examples as you can without beating a dead horse.

You want them to understand that there is something about their child's behaviour that could be harmful to the child. You want them to understand that the behaviour is unacceptable. You want them to realize that they are causing this by not setting up appropriate boundaries.

You do not want them to feel you are attacking their child or their abilities as parents.

If they respond by telling you to cater to the child simply tell them you are not comfortable with that because you do not think it helps the child to give him or her everything he or she wants no matter what. If you can be more diplomatic about it then even better.

If they blow you off, if they say they'll take care of it but seem to not really care, become a little more aggressive and express a concern that the child might be expecting that his or her desires be met without concerns for the conveniences of others or a respect for authority.

If they become defensive you can do the above but also a good idea to point out that you understand that different people have different ideas on how to best support their children and explain your concerns while making it clear that you respect their right to raise their child as they wish.

If it becomes clear that they will not understand and being around this child is more difficult for you than you can reasonably be expected to deal with then, perhaps, you need to simply tell them to leave the kid with a sitter when they visit you our you visit them.

Whatever you do please be sure to let them know that this is the only time you bring this subject up (unless they bring the kid after you have asked them not to, obviously). If they want to discuss it at a later time they are always welcome to. Sometimes they need time to think or are incapable of realizing the problem until later. If they understand that you won't be droning on about it but will be there to support them they will be more open to turning to you for advice when they realize the hellion they've turned their kid into.

Just remember that people can take parenting advice very personally. It can seem an attack on them as people.

If, however, you don't care to be around them or their child and don't care if it harms your relationship with them then let them know exactly why and what you think without mincing words. It probably won't make any difference in how they spoil their child but it will solve your problem.

Answer 3

i'm able to attend to stressful little ones. My youngest has a maximum suitable buddy it is extremely stressful (needy, talk talk talk, clingy and so on) yet what you describe, no i'm no longer able to attend to. Spoiled, entitled and violent force me unquestionably batty. i could shop making up those excuses till they get the element. i'm no longer very confrontational whilst it includes my little ones friends and their households. i attempt to ease outta those circumstances as right now and gently as i'm able to. in the journey that your son particularly needs to entice close out with this newborn, i could plan park journeys and activities that did no longer enable the youngster at your place or yours there. Invite in a manner that consists of the mothers and dads so if the different newborn is appearing bratty then it is your que to get a headache and decrease it short.

Answer 4

You just have to put your foot down. People come to our house and just know that their children must behave or I will deal with them if their parents don't. I don't care if they don't like me dealing with their kids, they don't have to come back. I do not allow my children to disrespect other peoples house rules or property either. People work too hard and pay too much money for their things to have kids destroy them. I do not allow it. Sometimes you have to be a "B".

Answer 5

Stop seeing your relatives so often, or only see your relatives without their kids. Seriously, it worked for my parents

Answer 6

take things into your own hands. i do. i make other peoples kids clean up their messes, sit nicely, don't talk or butt into adult conversations(they can talk but not over what we're saying), no running, pee IN the toilet not around it, no swearing, do not whine, and do NOT disrespect anyone in the house.
sometimes you have to be a b***** to save your sanity and your stuff from being trashed.

Answer 7

i have no idea, perhaps ... wish that you were born in different family will help?

or.. move out of the country.. then you won;t get to meet them often

Answer 8

these are relatives? be a @#$#%^&, because the world won't be as nice

Answer 9

you cant, no matter what you say about them, even nicely,, they will complain about you,

just do not invite them over anymore,