My husband works 40 hour weeks, we have two small children (1.5 & 3 yrs old) and i work a minimum of 3hrs a week. am i being selfish to ask him to do 1 chore around the house as well cleaning up after himself.
2007-03-10 22:31:41 · 16 answers · asked by mtm 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think its reasonable, but I also think he has a right to say "no". You may work 3 hours, but you are still the homemaker. It is your job to make sure this gets done.
2007-03-13 15:30:56 · answer #1 · answered by L.A. Scene 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you both work, you both should split the household chores in half. That's my opinion. One person shouldn't have more responsibility than the other, and it's not just the woman's job to keep up the household chores. Especially since you have two small children, I'll go out on a limb here and assume that you are primarily the one dealing with the children. So yes, your husband needs to start helping around the house. If he doesn't want to, then offer him the option of hiring and paying for a maid. But don't YOU be his maid!!! You have enough on your plate.
2007-03-11 06:43:11 · answer #2 · answered by heather_chavous 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A relationship is 50/50 and that also includes chores. Even if it is a small chore that he completes for you- it's all a help.
Your not being selfish - he is, if he does nothing to help you, and he should be cleaning up after himself( he's the grown up not the child-he just might need to be reminded of this fact- men usually do :).
Have a word with him about this matter you might be pleasantly be surprised with his reaction.
I'm sure if you told him your too tired to make love with him from all the running around you are doing and cleaning up after him he would help out (worth a try :)
2007-03-12 20:24:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hell NO- coming from a mother of just one toddler- He should be kissing your feet that you are only asking for 1 chore and for him to clean after his self. My husband picks up what I can't, regardless if he worked 40 hours, he knows I am just as tired from chasing a 2 yr old all day. Bottom line- You shouldn't have to clean up after him ALL the time (every woman has picked up after a messy man many a times but your not his mother, your his wife.). And He should of already been helping you with the children and other chores.
2007-03-11 06:47:48 · answer #4 · answered by sss_1122 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I work full time and I do some stuff around the house. I am usually the one that cleans up the kitchen after dinner everynight. I vacuum the house sometimes, do my own laundry most of the time, do all the cooking on the weekends, do at least half the grocery shopping.
I'm not saying all men should do this but I find it a little hard to believe that he can't do SOMETHING to help out a little.
2007-03-11 07:33:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes, its selfish. You're at home all day, so cleaning is your job. If you ask him to do just one or two things, like take out the garbage, or cook a meal or two a week, thats fine, but since he's working all the time you should be taking care of the house. I wont even let my husband clean, even though we both work. The reason for that is, even though i work, my work is not as physically hard as his and he works more hours, so I feel I should do all the housework. Thats just how it is. You dont realize how much more difficult a man's job is compared to raising children. Even if they run you ragged, you're at home all day, and you can wear pj's and watch tv and you dont have a boss breathing down your neck all the time. When he gets home let him relax!
2007-03-11 16:48:21 · answer #6 · answered by Jennifer B 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Selfish? NO!!!! Your his wife and not his Maid. You both should share in all duties. Its both your lives, your children and your house. As to comprise, OK honey , I"ll finish up, you go play, change, dress, bath, the children. Its going to be a very up hill battle, if you have been doing to all for a long time. He could do something for you in a big way, Hire a house cleaner to come in once or twice a month to do the deep cleaning. It really doesn't cost that much.
2007-03-11 06:47:55 · answer #7 · answered by livelovelaugh 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No mtm. The secret to a happy, healthy and loving home is the participation of everyone involved doing their own fair share (age approprite of course!) this includes your hubby. Remember that you are not superwoman (although us mums can come so darn close) and it's important to get some help. The quicker it gets done, the quicker you and hubby can catch alone time together. My girls (aged 2, and 3) do their fair share such as picking up some of their toys and have learnt to put things back when they have finished too. You must remember though to keep the tasks age appropriate. Hubby does his thing around the house - i do mine. Works for us and we are so much happier for it too. *winks*
2007-03-11 06:39:31 · answer #8 · answered by kelstar 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Selfish? No, There is no reason he cannot help out. You are his wife not his maid! If you are doing all of your duties, then he should definitly help out. Noone said that working is all a man is responsible for.
2007-03-11 06:46:46 · answer #9 · answered by JENNIFER C 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you have kids that's a full time job. No it's not unreasonable to ask him to help out
2007-03-11 06:45:42 · answer #10 · answered by Sherry Baby ( Ethan's Mama ) 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋