What is your opinion on homosexuals raising children and what are the consequences of this?

Question

Man In Search Of Answers, posted an excellent, thought prevoking question in Women's Studies a week ago asking "Can a single mother bring up a son without a father? will he ever be a man?**" There were some very interesting and enlightening responses from posters.

** http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Considering the effect that single mother households have on boys, what would the consequences of gays raising both boys and girls be? I am certainly not infering they will all turn gay, but will this affect these children adversely?

Link didn't work, I'll try again.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgPu_FaWpv6tRJnCe69qENojzKIX?qid=20070304025809AAJZdmD

Here are exerpts from a study from University of California and my comments:

1. Compared to the daughters of heterosexual mothers, the daughters of lesbians more frequently dress, play and behave in ways that do not conform to sex-typed cultural norms. They show greater interest in activities with both masculine and feminine qualities. They have higher aspirations to occupations that are not traditionally female.

So this is positive that girls are acting like boys, so this is an improvement on the heterosexual mother's influence? Are sex type cultural norms a social construct or are these women going to have difficulty in finding a suitable mate (assuming they are straight)

2. In terms of aggression and play, sons of lesbians behave in less traditionally masculine ways. They are likely to be more nurturing and affectionate than their counterparts in heterosexual families.

Until they try to bond with other boys, and get rejected by them for being wussies.

These boys will likely be singled out and picked on because they were not taught to defend themselves.

3. One study examined by the researchers indicated that a significantly greater proportion of young adult children raised by lesbians had engaged in a same-sex relationship (six of 25 interviewed) than those raised by a heterosexual mother (none of 20 interviewed).

4. Those raised by lesbian mothers were also more likely to consider a homosexual relationship.

So there IS a higher risk of children raised by homosexuals parent to be gay

5. Teen-age and young adult girls raised by lesbian mothers appear to be more sexually adventurous and less chaste than girls raised by heterosexual mothers. Sons, on the other hand, were somewhat less sexually adventurous and more chaste than boys raised by heterosexuals.

So the girls act like boys and the boys act like girls. Does this mean that the boys are more chaste because they cannot attract girls because girls are not attracted to “nurturing and affectionate” boys???

Is gender a social construct or does a man have to prove himself to have sex with a woman, yet a woman can have sex with many men merely by opening her legs? Maybe this is the reason why there is (or used to be) a stigma for unchaste women???.

6. The studies indicate that sexual orientation has no measurable effect on the quality of parent-child relationships or on the mental health of children.

Until the girl grows up and realises that giving men what they want willy nilly does not gain the respect from men and the boy grows up and eventually realise that women do not respect him because NO ONE respects him for being ‘nurturing and affectionate” He never learnt what it is to be a man.

NARTH"s Joseph Nicolosi offered the following comments: "This paper was authored by a professor of gender studies, so it is not surprisingly that the differences on which she focused have to do with a rejection of gender conformity. Indeed, what she found makes sense -- lesbian mothers tend to have a feminizing effect on their sons, and a masculinizing effect on their daughters.

The ideals of feminism right there in this study.

Source: http://www.narth.com/docs/does.html (21 studies on gay parenting dating back to 1980)

I personally have very strong reservation about this social experiment that disregards the inate differences between HETEROSEXUAL men and women.

As a straight man I think it is great that gays and lesbians are accepted in our society, but this is going WAY TOO FAR.

Actually, to be honest, I am fvcking disgusted.

Homosexual people are 3% of society, they participate in mainstream society, but have their own subculture.

In heterosexual society even now after the prevalance of liberalism and feminism, men are attracted to feminine women and women are attracted to masculine men. This idea that gender is a social construct established within feminism (and the gay community) is causing many problems. I have already mentioned some:

Girls acting like boys and the boys act like girls. The consequences of this is that boys cannot attract girls because girls are not attracted to “nurturing and affectionate” boys. Women who concentrate on their career thinking they are independent and successful, find when they get older they wonder why men are not interested in them (the men they are interested in, successful men). The men however are interested in young women who want to devote themselves to family, not career. This is the best situation for raising children, even with the woman working P/T.

Women giving men what they want, without restraint, does not gain the respect from men, they will have sex with her, but will find a woman that won't give her sexuallity away so freely for a realtionship and the boy grows up and eventually realise that women do not respect him because NO ONE respects him for being ‘nurturing and affectionate” He never learnt what it is to be a man. Yes men can be nurturing and affectionate, but they need to be men first, they must be strong, assertive to be able to florish in HETEROSEXUAL, MAINSTREAM culture.

For boys to be accepted by their peers (and later men) they must overcome their fears to participate and compete with the other boys. This is how boys grow into men and is the reason why countries were colonised, infastucture was developed and why we have the standard of living we have now.

If you breed a society of "nurturing men" and 'masculine girls" what are the consequences to society?

This is what I am concerned about.

With regards to abusive families, whether straight or gay, this is a problem. Gay families are not an alterative abusive families as this is implying that gays are less dysfunctional that heterosexuals, we are all human, eh.

I am concerned that the children will be brought up not being able to fit in with MAINSTREAM culture,

Answer 1

The best environment in which children can be raised is with a mother and a father. Heaps of research has shown us that.

There are circumstances, of course, where a child starts out being raised by a mother and father but then later on -- through death or divorce -- it becomes a single-parent situation.

That's one thing when that happens, but it's entirely different when someone intentionally brings a child, right from the get-go, into a situation where there's not a mother and father. That would include gay couples.

I'm afraid that the push to allow gay couples to adopt kids isn't being made with the kids' best interests in mind. It's being made with the gays' best interests in mind -- which, in my mind, is an automatic red flag.

Gays can go implement their social experiments somewhere else, and in some other manner. They don't need to meddle with, and experiment with, kids' lives.

Not when there are thousands of heterosexual married couples who are on years-long adoption waiting lists.

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Answer 2

I hate the word "homosexuals"...it makes the GLBT community sound like we have a contagious disease or something. Regardless, I laugh at how so many people state that "children need 1 mother and 1 father because that's what's kept society together for so long".... and then I look at the facts:
1. Heterosexual marriages have gay children
2. The divorce rate in America alone is up 40% since 1970
3. Heterosexual men and women legalized abortion and outlawed gay marriage.
4. Composition of substantiated child abuse in 2000:
879,000 children were victims of child maltreatment.
Neglect ~ 63%
Physical ~ 19%
Sexual ~ 10%
Psychological ~ 8%
***These realities are the object of 200 years of repressed heterosexual white men running America. Let's just say I believe it's the heterosexuals whom we sincerely need to study more closely, and watch for 'odd behaviors', inconsistent discipline styles, negligence, and all around need for sterilization. They obviously haven't figured out the "parenting thing" thus far.

Answer 3

I was raised in an environment without a father, and I am just as healthy and well-adjusted as the next guy. In fact, I know that if he HAD been my "daddy dearest", I might not have turned out so well. He has his own issues, and had he been part of my life, they might have become mine, as well.

Now, as for whether or not gays can adopt children, if they are any better fathers (or mothers) than my dad was, than I say, nothing should stop them. Not all the "research" in the world (which has anyway pointed to children being raised by gays and lesbians to turn out the same as everyone else) will be enough to convince me otherwise, because the only research that is verifiable is that from personal experience.

Answer 4

I think it's one of those issues about which everyone has an opinion, but facts are scarce.
Basically all our opinions are based on the mantra 'this is how we've always done it, so it must be the right way'.

And yes, there is something to be said for that. If it was the right way for ten thousand years, it must have some merit!

Having said that, children are very powerful little creatures, and they accept any situation 'as is'.
Kid has two mothers or two fathers? Frankly, it doesn't know the difference.
If you have to have a talk about 'where it came from', I imagine it's the same idea as with adoption.

As for the idea that a kid of two same-sex parents will absolutely be gay him/herself: That's the old nurture vs nature argument.
People are born with their sexuality. If that wasn't so, then with all the straight couples we have, there would be no gay people.
And how is it possible that siblings can be so different, when they were brought up by the same parents?

Don't overestimate the role parents play in the upbringing: The kid develops himself in any situation you put him in. The parents just provide for his needs.

Answer 5

There are actually not any effects. Given the question quoted, i'm assuming you're frightened on the subject of the babies no longer having common masculine and lady personalities. My answer to that's if that happens then sturdy. there is no longer something incorrect with female boys and masculine ladies. They get an prolonged in society in basic terms wonderful. They make acquaintances they're happy with. They visit varsity and graduate. They finally end up in a happy courting and have a competent kin. everybody is diverse. often circumstances telling some to act like a woman or act like a boy restricts what they decide to do. the only people who care approximately that anymore tend to be older individuals of society. a woman does not might desire to play with barbies, difficulty approximately makeup, and grow to be a nurse. she will play with vehicles, roll in the airborne dirt and dust, and grow to be a working laptop or pc scientist. Boys can do an analogous (different than reversed). there is no longer something incorrect with the two and this might ensue is right this moment, gay, single parent, or any form of larger half and infants. What adversely impacts babies is undesirable parenting, undesirable neighborhoods, and undesirable colleges.

Answer 6

I question the validity of your sources. Very few points rang true as I read.

The reason I doubt the "facts" you present is life experience. I am the product of being raised in a gay relationship. I am one of six children that, for reasons we do not need to discuss, were all sent to foster homes for a period of time. My oldest brother joined the Army. My older sisters went into a home for troubled teens. My two younger brothers went into the same foster home, and I was in two foster homes, ending up in the same home as my two younger brothers. The four youngest were brought out of the foster care system and back to my mothers home with the help and support of her life partner. None of the four of us raised in the gay household are gay. When I was a teen, our family was one of the six families showcased in a documentary to be shown to judges in child-custody cases in which the custody is being questioned simply because one parent asking for custody (usually the mother) is gay.
I am proud to have known my mothers partner and to have learned so much from her. There is nothing wrong with homosexuals raising children...it all depends on the individual, not the sexual orientation.

Answer 7

I'm straight and all for homosexuals raising children. People say that it would scar the kid and teach them to be gay. Not true. Nobody can teach you to be a certain sexual preference. The consequences would be the same as heterosexuals or bisexuals raising children. Some may grow up to be billionaires, some the President or Prime Minister, some a criminal.

There is nothing wrong with homosexuals raising children.

Answer 8

I am not against it-homosexual couples raising children that is- for one simple reason: The number of children that are orphaned or abandoned.

It is better to provide for a child an environment where they can learn and grow with loving parents, then to leave them with a feeling of abandonement and rejection in a foster home.

As long as the individuals who are adopting a child can prove that they are responsible, hard working nurturing parents then they should be given the opportunity to raise a child.

I'm not sure about this, but I've heard of studies that show that children raised under homosexual parents have a normal childhood and grow up to be responsible adults. Also the studies showed that the chance of the kids becoming homosexuals themselves are minimal if not non-existent.

Good Question

EDIT:______________________

I can see that you are obviously against it. But there are many factors that you fail to take under consideration: such as my argument.

Let me ask you this: would you rather have a productive, intelligent, responsible, law-abiding member of society who is gay or a psychologically ill, depraved, criminal, with childhood issues, who feels rejected, unwanted, unloved, who doesnt care heterosexual roaming about. I would think the lesser of two evils applies here.

I too am somewhat against homosexuality (because I do not understand it). But whatever there condition is (if they even have one) they can still be good parents.

So no matter what your opinion of them is. I would much rather have our unwanted children loved and cared for, brought up right by whoever steps up to the plate. It could be baloo from the jungle book for all I care.

Answer 9

Tthank you for mentioning that your source is NARTH. That "organization" has been widely and soundly discredited by the legitimate medical and psychological authorities.

There has yet to be done any accredited study on this subject that notes ANY adverse effects on children raised in same-sex households. Meanwhile, many studies have been done showing no (or statistically negligible) differences between children raised in hetero vs same-sex households.

You call gay people raising kids an experiment that you don't approve of, but have given no compeling reason for this "experiment" to end, just your personal distaste for it.

What is your suggestion then? Should the hundreds of thousands of children in orphanages and foster homes continue to wait for permanent, loving homes? Should the over 1 million (by US Census data) children living in homes led by same-sex couples (includng my daughter) be torn from their homes? Where would they go? Your house?

Now THERE are a couple of interesting social experiments to conduct on children. Write your congressman and get going on that.

Answer 10

News flash: HETEROSEXUALS raise gay children. Did we happen to forget that?

Btw, can a single father raise a child? I saw "one mom, two moms, or two dads", but what about one DAD?

No, I don't believe that being raised in a single-parent family or being raised in a "gay" family has any adverse affect on the children. I mean, other than they're some of the most open-minded people I've ever met.

Granted, it's difficult for a single mom to raise a boy child. The social ideals are divergent. However, it CAN and HAS been done many hundreds of times. Heck, single dads have raised perfectly fine young ladies, too. Let's not forget them, now.

All in all, no, it really doesn't effect the children in a NEGATIVELY adverse manner.

Answer 11

There is absolutely nothing wrong with members of the GLBT community raising children, alone, or in a committed relationship. Or, up here in Canada, married!!

Don't forget that in a lot of cases the children are from when the parent was in a 'straight' relationship!!

I don't want to forget all those kids that are out there waiting to be adopted; they will grow up in a home filled with love - much better for them than in group homes or orphanages!!

Please find below some excellent links that may put your mind at ease.