What is your opinion on homosexuals raising children and what are the consequences of this?

Question

Man In Search Of Answers, posted an excellent, thought prevoking question a week ago asking "Can a single mother bring up a son without a father? will he ever be a man?**" There were some very interesting and enlightening responses from posters.

** http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgPu_FaWpv6tRJnCe69qENojzKIX?qid=20070304025809AAJZdmD

Considering the effect that single mother households have on boys, what would the consequences of gays raising both boys and girls be? I am certainly not infering they will all turn gay, but will this affect these children adversely?

First link didn't work, I'll try again.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AgPu_FaWpv6tRJnCe69qENojzKIX?qid=20070304025809AAJZdmD

Here are excerpts from a study from University of California and my comments:

1. Compared to the daughters of heterosexual mothers, the daughters of lesbians more frequently dress, play and behave in ways that do not conform to sex-typed cultural norms. They show greater interest in activities with both masculine and feminine qualities. They have higher aspirations to occupations that are not traditionally female.

#So it is positive that girls are acting like boys, is this an improvement on the heterosexual mother's influence? Are sex type cultural norms a social construct or are these women going to have difficulty in finding a suitable mate (assuming they are straight) when older?

2. In terms of aggression and play, sons of lesbians behave in less traditionally masculine ways. They are likely to be more nurturing and affectionate than their counterparts in heterosexual families.

#Until they try to bond with other boys, and get rejected by them for being wussies.

These boys will likely be singled out and picked on because they were not taught to defend themselves.

3. One study examined by the researchers indicated that a significantly greater proportion of young adult children raised by lesbians had engaged in a same-sex relationship (six of 25 interviewed) than those raised by a heterosexual mother (none of 20 interviewed).

4. Those raised by lesbian mothers were also more likely to consider a homosexual relationship.

#So there IS a higher risk of children raised by homosexuals parents to be gay.

5. Teen-age and young adult girls raised by lesbian mothers appear to be more sexually adventurous and less chaste than girls raised by heterosexual mothers. Sons, on the other hand, were somewhat less sexually adventurous and more chaste than boys raised by heterosexuals.

#So the girls act like boys and the boys act like girls. Does this mean that the boys are more chaste because they cannot attract girls as girls are not attracted to “nurturing and affectionate” boys???

Is gender a social construct or does a man have to prove himself to have sex with a woman, yet a woman can have sex with many men merely by opening her legs? Maybe this is the reason why there is (or used to be) a stigma towards unchaste women???.

6. The studies indicate that sexual orientation has no measurable effect on the quality of parent-child relationships or on the mental health of children.

#Until the girl grows up and realises that giving men what they want willy nilly does not gain the respect from men and the boy grows up and eventually realises that women do not respect him because NO ONE respects him for being ‘nurturing and affectionate” He never learnt what it is to be a man.

NARTH"s Joseph Nicolosi offered the following comments: "This paper was authored by a professor of gender studies, so it is not surprisingly that the differences on which she focused have to do with a rejection of gender conformity. Indeed, what she found makes sense -- lesbian mothers tend to have a feminizing effect on their sons, and a masculinizing effect on their daughters.

#The ideals of feminism right there in this study.

Source: http://www.narth.com/docs/does.html... (21 studies on gay parenting dating back to 1980)

I personally have very strong reservations about this social experiment that disregards the innate differences between HETEROSEXUAL men and women.

As a straight man I think it is great that gays and lesbians are accepted in our society, but this is going WAY TOO FAR.

Actually, to be honest, I am fvcking disgusted.

Homosexual people are 3% of society, they participate in mainstream society, but have their own subculture.

In heterosexual society even now after the prevalence of liberalism and feminism, men are attracted to feminine women and women are attracted to masculine men. This idea that gender is a social construct established within feminism (and the gay community) is causing many problems. I have already mentioned some:

Girls acting like boys and the boys act like girls. The consequences of this are that boys cannot attract girls because girls are not attracted to “nurturing and affectionate” boys. Women, who concentrate on their career thinking they are independent and successful, find when they get older they wonder why men are not interested in them (the men they are interested in, successful men). The men however are interested in young women who want to devote themselves to family, not career. This is the best situation for raising children, even with the woman working P/T.

A woman giving men what they want, without restraint, does not gain the respect from men, they will have sex with her, but will find a woman that won't give her sexuality away so freely for a relationship and the boy grows up and eventually realises that women do not respect him because NO ONE respects him for being ‘nurturing and affectionate” He never learnt what it is to be a man. Yes men can be nurturing and affectionate, but they need to be men first, they must be strong, assertive to be able to flourish in HETEROSEXUAL, MAINSTREAM culture.

For boys to be accepted by their peers (and later men) they must overcome their fears to participate and compete with the other boys. This is how boys grow into men and is the reason why countries were colonised, infrastructure was developed and why we have the standard of living we have now.

If you breed a society of "nurturing men" and 'masculine girls" what are the consequences to this society?

This is what I am concerned about.

With regards to abusive families, whether straight or gay, this is a problem. Gay families are not an alterative abusive families as this is implying that gays are less dysfunctional that heterosexuals, we are all human, eh.

I am concerned that the children will be brought up not being able to fit in with MAINSTREAM culture.

Answer 1

The consequences of Gays raising children is clearly that more children will be bicurious as they grow up, since Homosexuality is presented to them throughout their lives from their parents.

Secondly, in a Gay relationship between men who have a son, the boy may have more difficulty understanding women & sexual relationships with them as he grows up. In Lesbian relationships, a young boy may be trained to only see a womans view in relationships and find himself later on in life being pushed around by women.

Thirdly, even though these possibilities happen, even in straight relationships kids grow up with little understanding of the opposite sex as well. I think all that matters is to raise kids the smart way. Most poeple regardless of sexuality have trouble doing that.

EDIT: bikerchickjill - You mentioned "Given the fact that a homo couple cannot produce a baby on its own, one can easily deduce that any child entering a homo couple's life is truly planned for and wanted." I don't think that is something you can easily deduce since there are many straight couples who can't have babies who adopt for the wrong reasons and the child ends up not really being wanted the way it should. Human beings make mistakes, I don't think that being Gay makes Gays impervious to those mistakes.

EDIT: bikerchickjill you also said, "Given the fact that most homo couples interact with the opposite sex, one can easily deduce that the child will get influenced by an adult of the opposite sex." Theres many straight people who are around straight people all the time who don't get much positive influence from the opposite sex. So I don't see how that can be easily deduced that just because a gay family may interact with a few straight people, that they will get relevent influences by one of the opposite sex.

I'm not trying to bash you or anything, just, as a straight person, I've seen things that happen that goes against what you've said with these points. I think that a gay or straight couple with children is no better or worse, none is more special or more grand than the other. Both have issues & can't raise children properly unless they raise children the smart way.

Answer 2

There are no consequences. Given the question quoted, I'm assuming you are worried about the children not having typical masculine and feminine personalities. My answer to that is if that happens then good. There is nothing wrong with feminine boys and masculine girls. They get a long in society just fine. They make friends they are happy with. They go to college and graduate. They end up in a happy relationship and have a good family.

Everyone is different. Often times telling some to act like a girl or act like a boy restricts what they want to do. The only people who care about that anymore tend to be older members of society. A girl does not need to play with barbies, worry about make-up, and become a nurse. She can play with cars, roll in the mud, and become a computer scientist. Boys can do the same (except reversed). There is nothing wrong with either and this can happen is straight, gay, single parent, or any type of household. What adversely affects children is bad parenting, bad neighborhoods, and bad schools.

Answer 3

I read a study on just this issue and basically what they stated were that these children grew up the most well adjusted of all. The reason for this is that they did not have all those unreasonable expectations of trying to conform to a normal family that really doesn't exist anywhere but in mythology of society. They were fine about their own self image and were less likely to be opinionated nor judgemental about others. There were less likely to see themselves as abnormal because they understood that families were all different sizes and mixtures and that means extended families and single parent families. By extolling the belief system that a normal family consists of mother, father and children we are in a sense telling children that don't have this particular grouping that they are not normal and this can lead to long term detrimental effects on themselves and poor self image as a product of these comparisons..

Answer 4

Good question, because empirical data is no less objective than any studies that have been done. The likelihood of a truly double blind study on this subject is extremely low.

My comparison is to being raised by their biological parents in a reasonably happy home (no family's perfect).

- because of increasingly strong societal pressures to embrace homosexuality.

Here are the positives I can think of:

1) They learn that it is OK to be different, even proud, if it is what you believe to be right. This could make it easier to say no to drugs, for example.

2) They would probably learn to be more tolerant of others' views and lifestyles, even if they don't care to participate. Especially people in the minority.

3) My homosexual (male) neighbors maintain their property impeccably well. (I gave up trying to keep up). They would probably raise very well dressed, neighborly, and intelligent children.

Here is my (yes, longer) list of negatives:

1) The balance between the male and female parenting is well documented. 2 or more mothers does not replace a father - and vice versa. (Although one of my neighbors acts as the "wife" and the other as the "husband.")

2) Much more subjective criteria of right and wrong values. More likely to reject the concept of "immoral behavior", as defined by others. More likely to reject the concept of "standards of behavior", as defined by others.

3) They're socialized to believe that a strong desire may simply be a "different" desire, even if it is biologically abnormal. Thus, more likely to "go with" the desire, whatever it is. Since right and wrong is so subjective in their mind, there is little reason to resist whatever the desire might be.

4) Children desire a father AND a mother and the connection to who they "really" are (siblings, grandparents, etc.) Eventually, they learn that everyone's existence required 1 of each, not 2 of 1.

5) All people want to know who their "real" (i.e. biological) father and mother is. (Though this could become known).

Some of these could affect single parent and adoptive families too, but to answer your question, I included what does/would impact the scenario you asked about.

Answer 5

Hmmmmmm

I suppose if single parents can raise children, then two parents of the same gender should obviously be allowed.

The important thing is to have other good male/female rolemodels for the kids as they grow up.

In evolutionary terms, the best parents for a child are a man and a woman. The whole reason homosexuality evolved was to to reduce the impact of poor genes in reproduction. (the chances of a boy being gay increase for every older brother he has.)

But in my opinion. There's nothing to gain from disallowing gays to adopt/have kids. It's all about freedom, baby.

Answer 6

The answer to that depends on who the people are who are raising the children, not their sexual preferences. I worked in the mental health field for a while and had the opportunity to hear the histories of many severely disturbed adolescents. I have also known many gay people.
What stands out above all the other details in people's lives is who they are as people. The measure of their character, their integrity. I have heard the horror that some heterosexuals will commit on their children. I have seen the depth and dignity and grace that some homosexuals rely upon to raise their children. Who a person falls in love with has very little to do with how a family raises it's children.

Answer 7

Given the fact that you did not quote an exact source of the study that you mention in your question, I cannot honor its validity and deductions.

But here is some common sense:

Given the fact that just about every homo has straight parents, one can easily deduce that the sexuality of children is not determined by the sexuality of the parents who are raising them.

Given the fact that a homo couple cannot produce a baby on its own, one can easily deduce that any child entering a homo couple's life is truly planned for and wanted. (no "oops" pregnancies)

Given the fact that most homo couples interact with the opposite sex, one can easily deduce that the child will get influenced by an adult of the opposite sex.

Answer 8

It is my opionion that a persons sexuality in no way can determine their parenting ablities. I actually think having gay parents could teach a child many valuable lessons about toleration. As long as the home enviorment is stable and loving the children will grow up wonderfully.

I also have to mention that I dont believe a child raised in a gay home will nessecarily be gay.. gayness is not contagious.. to prove my point.. just think about how many hetersexual familys have gay children. If sexuality was contagous, or learned.. wouldn't all heterosexuals children be hetero?

Answer 9

Your points are bias and one sided.

There is a lot of information from the other side of Homosexuality that refutes what you have stated and we will never hear about from the Liberal media.

It's is not a healthy state for children to be raised in a homosexual environment.
Homosexuality goes against God's teaching and will never work, and in the end everyone loses.

I expect to gain the thumbs down. So be it. But, what I said will hold true.

Because the truth never changes.

Answer 10

Even with a heterosexual couple raising kids parenting styles vary widely. The only thing that might affect the kids is how that child is treated based on the lifestyle of his or her parents.