What do i do?

Question

I am currently with a man that i have a child with, love him to death. I met someone else (i should know better) I really like him and could have a nice life with him. But i almost wonder if its because hes a biker and hes rough and exciting, he thinks the world of me. I love it!!!! I shouldnt even be asking this question but i guess it doesnt hurt to get input on what everone else thinks. Please be nice, its a very touchy subject for me.

Ok maybe i should have explained every single detail
- I am 30 years old
- my man wont have sex with me
- We are not married
- Hes has other females calling him
- I've known the biker for 8 years
All this is not new, now do you not have respect for me. Theres the whole story!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 1

What you're going through is normal. Don't beat yourself up about it.

You are not being silly at all.

You should continue to see the bike guy but I wouldn't have sex with him. Get to know him very well before deciding to leave your current love. It might be just infatuation but that takes time to tell.

I say, give yourself the chance to find out.
After all, it IS your life and you should be happy in it.
Don't feel guilty. You really do need to explore your true feelings for both men for awhile, before deciding what you want.

I can see why your eye is wandering. I just read your added details.
It sounds like your mate does not want to commit to you at all. Especially in marriage and he cheats.

This is not a healthy relationship. I feel for you.

At 30 years old we are not getting any younger. It's time for you to explore other options. Meaning men.

I say, continue in your pursuit of this guy that you have known well for 8 years.

You won't hear me cutting you down. You're a smart lady and you need to be loved. You are definitely not getting that at home.

Life is short. I say go for it and if anyone has a problem with that, let them keep it to themselves.

You have every right to feel the way you do.

Go for it.

Answer 2

Well no one can really tell you what to do because you are already going to do what you want. Do you think it best to spilt up your family or would you rather do this and find out that maybe it wasn't such a good idea. You should do what is best for you child first off. But then you should think of all the time you have had with your current relationship. Is it worth it to ruin all of that. This may just be a phase, you may be lusting for someone else because of something the relationship you currently have isn't doing for you. Maybe you should do some communicating in your current relationship. It may be because you are unhappy that you are seeking other attention. Don't make a hasty desision before you consider all the things that would happen either way. Best of luck and I hope you do the right thing, peace.

Answer 3

Has the man you are currently with offered to help you and take care of you and your child? On the otherhand, what makes you think this biker would do anything better for you than your child's father because he is "rough and exciting"? How do you know what he thinks of you? Has either of these men offered you anything other than sex? You need answers from your child's father before you go and complicate your life and the life of your child with another entanglement with no obvious future to look forward to. The grass is not always greener on the other side. Best wishes.

Answer 4

Often times we don't know what we really had until we loose it. I think this may be the case. Although you may be quite physically attracted to this man, I don't believe it has the lower more powerful feelings that a real relationship does. You need to consider what you truly want. But don't forget about your child either. Your choices either way will have a huge effect on the rest of his/her life. I wouldn't suggest the other man at all, but you need to decide for yourself on what you truly want, and what your true deep down feelings are.

Answer 5

If you love who your with, then stay with him and try to work on the relationship, when you get a little older, rough and exciting makes for a stressfull life, Also what about your child, does your new friend accept him. Let your man know you want to feel he thinks the world of you too, he probably does. Tell him you feel a little lonely. good luck to you

Answer 6

I found myself in a situation like yours about 2 years ago. I left the love of my life for a "bad boy", and guess what it really was bad. I found myself being more and more confused. The bad boy wan't there for me like my man was and although he was a wonderful guy, it wasn't the same. I was lucky and my man took me back, but it has made it incredibly hard for us, because he had alotof problems with trust after that, (can u blame him?) but we worked at it. My advice to you is this, unless you are really truely unhappy and miserable, which if you really truely love him youre probably not, dont leave him. Besides, your child deserves to have two parents that love him/her and that love each other.

Answer 7

After age 18, do not invest more than 2 - 3 yrs. in a relationship
without marriage. Do not have kids out of wedlock..Get a good
Pre-Nup before marriage to protect yourself in event of death
or divorce...Never marry a man that has character problems,
you can't change him and he will get worse after marriage..
Having said that...
Marry the guy you had a kid with and get a pre-nup before
you marry....Stay away from the biker....Have a little loyalty
to your spouse ....Show some character...

Answer 8

trust me, the grass isnt always going to be greener. your obviously young, but since you have a child, you no longer have the luxury of being selfish. think whats best for your child first and always. your just getting caught up with the bad boy image.

Answer 9

just remember if you wouldnt want him to do the same thing to you . . .dont do it. dont even think about it . . . carma is a b***h. and if your not careful. . . YOU will be the one that gets blind sided and hurt. . .not him. think real hard about it first. . . .all i can say is dont do it. . .that is unless you dont wanna be with your guy anymore. or if your not happy. ask yourself whats best for my child?

Answer 10

sometimes its just the thought of having someone else want you that just makes your spine tingle and your toes curl but just give it some thought before u disrupt your home some man who said you were cute