I love my husband dearly, but lately I haven't been wanting to have sex with him. I still find him very much appealing physically and this is frustrating him to no end. We used to have sex a lot, and recently it hasn't been as enjoyable and so I don't want to do it. What could be causing this?
2007-03-10 15:39:07 · 17 answers · asked by clytisciasha 3 in Health ➔ Women's Health
See that is the thing, he isn't into foreplay very much and I'm not into oral (the smell gets to me even if he just washed). He is starting to think that I'm not interested, I am I just don't want it.
2007-03-10 15:47:01 · update #1
there could be a lot of possible answers to this. various kinds of birth control can affect libido. do you have kids? sometimes there are hormone changes that occur after pregancy that can affect libido. breastfeeding is a real libido-stomper. fatigue, or not feeling good in other ways can kill the sex drive too, as well as some other kinds of medication.
you don't say why you don't enjoy sex. if it is because of something your husband is doing or not doing differently, you should be honest with him. if it is because of pain, you should see an ob/gyn. if it is just a sex drive issue, a doctor may be able to help you sort through the various possibilities. don't be embarassed to discuss this with your doctor. you are married, your doctor knows that you are having sex. so don't be afraid to ask about it.
2007-03-10 15:49:20 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
thats common with married couples, why do you think tv shows poke fun at it so often? When you get married, so many other things come on your mind, instead of how you're going to keep him interested and stuff. If you're married, you know for sure he's interested and committed, so you don't feel the need to have sex so often to please him.
You coiuld try setting certain days, that way you still have sex, but you get a break. Like do...every Monday, Wednesday and Friday is a sex day or something.
See if that helps. If not, you can see a doctor and see why you've got a low sex drive lately
2007-03-10 23:44:35 · answer #2 · answered by toronto_leafs 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well, I definitely think that the lack of foreplay is part of the problem. Who wants to always just dive right in? You gotta warm up some. Also, trying different positions and maybe some role playing might help to bring back some of the excitement.
Or, if you're kinky, maybe bring another female into the mix...
2007-03-10 23:58:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think all women experience a decrease of sexual desire at some point in their relationship, its normal. And in a relationship we have to make the effort to keep that flame burning. Sometimes trying something new sexually can be exciting, or going away for a weekend, renting a motel room, try to remember the things he used to do that really turned you on in the beginning. And sometimes ladies we have to " JUST DO IT " because lets face it, the less often you have sex the less oxytocine (sexual hormone) we produce and therefore we simply loose the desire after a while and we get used to it......but by making an effort to really get back into it you will encourage your body to secrete more hormones and this will increase your sexual desires....this is medical fact ! So go ahead, this is your man, please him and allow him to please you !
2007-03-10 23:51:21 · answer #4 · answered by Mandy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The answer, You might just not want sex.
There's really no answer on why you dont want to.
Talk to your husband, tell him how you are feeling.
He might be able to talk it out of you, or just help you cope.
If you are over 40 or around 50 make sure you're not going through mennapause(sp)
That could also cause it.
2007-03-10 23:44:48 · answer #5 · answered by courtneygrater838 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont worry about it, ive been married for almost two years and our sex life is already crap as hell... i'm just not into sex period i found it to be highly overrated and he's the total opposite but there'll be some months we have sex on a regular basis other times it'll be like twice a month it just depends. i suggest just concentrating on the other great parts of your marriage and not make sex your top priority, everything else will just fall into place.
2007-03-11 00:21:18 · answer #6 · answered by carrol_87 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do things the same old way. Do things that are a little different than your normal routine. Try "fooling around" with him. Play doctor. Play dress up. Go to a movie and be a little naughty! Go to a drive-in and be alot naughty. Use your hands and his hands to bring stimulation. I love to use my hands on my wife. It drives her crazy!!!!
Good luck and have fun.
2007-03-11 00:05:11 · answer #7 · answered by pukcipriavroc8v 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
See a doctor. This is essential to your marriage. A shift in hormone levels could do this. It could indicate something seriously wrong that has nothing much to do with sex, either. But they're much better at treating this, and very much better at taking it seriously now.
2007-03-10 23:46:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
maybe you should try therapy to get to whatever is causing this issue. Are you particularly stressed or depressed? Just as men sometimes develop issues with their libido's, women can as well, this can be very hard on our partners.
2007-03-11 00:10:14 · answer #9 · answered by Dawnita 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not just try new things. It isnt any fun without foreplay...maybe you should train him for that.
2007-03-11 00:32:54 · answer #10 · answered by The BecaNATOR 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋