Why do men do this when caught?

Question

Why do men lie and deny that they are cheating instead of just coming clean and telling the truth....especially if you have evidence and you have told them about it? Why do they try to play mind games and try to make you believe that they aren't cheating? If they are cheating then why do they lie and deny?

I just don't get it. If he's cheating then he obviously likes the other woman, so why not come clean and tell his wife he wants to be with her so he can go be with her? He won't ever get to really be with the other person until he does this. (or until his wife leaves him)

Answer 1

Because like Lenny Bruce said she'll believe the lie. Why ? Because she wants to believe the lie more than what you did.

Know how to tell when a man's lyin' to you ? His lips are moving.

Answer 2

There are two types of liars: Pathological and those who lie when threatened. Virtually all of us are the second type and too many of us are also the first type. The threat can be a physical one, an emotional, social or economic one or just a threat to our own self-image.
Why would anyone expect a cheater not to lie? Why do you think men do it more than women? Cheating can be about lots of things. Asking why they don't admit to cheating is kind of silly, don't you think? They might admit it if they really wanted to change or if they only wanted to hurt you or maybe some other reason like to get back into bed with you. Your best assumption is that the cheater will not change.

Answer 3

First Uii, get a life and stop advertising sites.
Second, the men that lie about cheating, have probably done it before and have gotten away with it. Their ex girlfriends always seemed to forgive them so why not you. They deny so that they don't have to deal with it and begging for forgiveness almost always works.
Because he's married only means he's is having the best of both worlds. He can have a fling on the side but be married on the other side. His wife should be the one you should be having a conversation with. If she doesn't know or is just turning a blind eye eventually it will end badly for someone.
Remember, once cheated, shame on you, twice a cheater shame, on me.

Answer 4

Not all men cheat. We are all differrent. But let me ask you this. Are you still happy with your life. Happiness is important. Do you think you can let it him go? It'll take time. You'll know it. If your men cheat on you and caught and he lied about it when you ask it means he's trying not to hurt your feelings but not telling the truth. But you have evidence right? It's really up to you to decide. If your love are strong enough it will do it. But keep in mind love is for both, not just you. Do whatever you know is for the best. Always be with someone your happy with. Listen to your heart.

Answer 5

It's instinctive - have you ever caught a child writing on the wall or sneaking a cookie? Their reaction is always "Wasn't me" or "I didn't do it". Self-preservation.
They (and women do it too, not just men) know they've done something wrong, and they know you've caught them. There's just this tiny little sliver of hope that if they lie, maybe you'll believe them... or maybe you really DON'T have evidence, and you're just bluffing. It's their last chance to get out of BIG TROUBLE, and they're willing to do whatever they feel is necessary to avoid further confrontation. What most don't realize is that there's little chance of any of the above happening, and that lying just makes it worse.

Response to your additional details -
Chances are, he doesn't actually want to be with her. If he loved her/wanted to be with her, he'd come clean without you catching him. He still wants to be with you - and is probably wondering why the he!! he did it in the first place. Like I said, lying is what he sees as his only chance at salvaging his marriage. If he wanted to be with her, he'd already be out the door and wouldn't bother lying to you about it.

Answer 6

You are being very unfair to women. They can behave as stupidly as any man. So, it's people. Why? I think it's all part of the fantasy world cheaters build up. They all believe that it's different with them. They aren't just stupid common cheaters, no, what they have is more. Every time And of course, since they'll never be caught, it'll always be a secret memory, and won't harm the spouse. And it it's all their fault anyway. Writing it down doesn't make it sound very reasonable, but people truly believe it. It would be funny, if it wasn't so sad.

Answer 7

Because it is easier to continue to deny the truth than to deal with the aftermath that will follow. There is alot of pain all around in affairs, in many ways, and the issue will need to be confronted. You should quit arguing about evidence and just begin asking why this happened and what it means.

Answer 8

admitting something u know is wrong, is one of the hardest things on your ego there is. he may deny it because he cares about your feelings, or still loves u and wants to keep his relationship , because he knows if he comes clean theres a good chance that it will be over with. sometimes men lie to avoid taking responsibility so they won't have to deal with the confrontation that they know is coming, because they are cowards. all kinds of reasons why they lie, all with a different motive.

Answer 9

This is from a guy, but I have lots of buddies that get into trouble like this. I guess from what I have seen is that guys are short sighted. The moment that guys see something they want (in this case, a girl) they forget everything that is currently going on. Until afterwards, then they remember. GUys deny becuase we're afraid to face our consequences and are not confidence in ourselves when we aren't in control.

Answer 10

Because if they tell you the truth then they are defeted. They know that the woman has the upper hand and they they might just get booted. They are not going to admit to cheating cause then they have to admit to doing something wrong. Which you should know that they rarely do that! =)