My former friend and I were both in the housing market. We live in a small town and are in the same price range. She mentioned a house that she liked and I agreeded that it was a cute house. I told her that I was going to look at it. We joked about getting into a bidding war. I called her after I looked at it and she looked at it. I asked her what she thought of the house, she said it was cute but it needed a lot of work and she was going to looka t other houses. I took that as she wasn't interested. So I went ahead and made an offer. the offer was accepted and I bought it. She has ended our friendship saying I stabbed her in the back and was not a good friend. I felt like she didn't want the house and when I found out she was mad, I even offered to take back my offer but she told me not to. we aren't friends anymore. Do you think I was wrong to put an offer on the house?
2007-03-10 07:54:49 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
not to mention the fact that we work together and told eveyone her side of the story....and making me look bad.
2007-03-10 07:58:26 · update #1
No. Ya snooze ya lose. She should have bid on the house if she wanted it. Too bad you seem to have lost a friend. Your friend should grow up and get over it. Congrats on the new house.
2007-03-10 08:00:01 · answer #1 · answered by dudeman 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You have done nothing wrong. You even went the extra mile by proposing to withdraw you offer to buy. If your friend REALLY wanted a shot at this house, then she would have taken you up on this and then made her move on the house. By giving you her opinion of the house as she did in the first place strongly indicated that she had ceased efforts on this particular property. Sure you COULD have informed her of your intention to make an offer, but you're not at fault for not doing so. Sounds like she is high maintenance. Apologize and move on. She'll come around in time. If she doesn't, then maybe that's best.
2007-03-10 16:04:38 · answer #2 · answered by RockHanger 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think you were wrong and while she may have been looking at other houses it sounds as though she wasn't interested. If she can't be happy for you for buying a house even if it was one she was interested then she obviously doesn't have your best interest at heart. That being said I can see her perspective of being upset that you got the house although it needed much work she may have been comparitive shopping. Let her go, with friendship there are bound to be difficulties and hardships, they are what make a friendship grow and thrive obviously yours wasnt strong enough to handle this setback. I am surfe that she will look back on this decision with regret and remorse but until then enjoy your house and relax, you did the best you could and most people would not have offered to withdraw their offer.
2007-03-10 16:02:46 · answer #3 · answered by kathleen a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To be honest i would have to hear her side of the story but from your side i would say she is jealous. Maybe there was a reason she could not buy it (lack of funds etc) and did not want you to have it. Leave it a while and let the dust settle and if you pass her in your small town then talk like nothing has happened and if she ignores you just chalk it up to experience and get on with your life. You have done nothing wrong and she will get over it.
2007-03-10 16:00:40 · answer #4 · answered by alice 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would approach this friend and appologize. Deeply, without reservation. By mail, in person. If they are really a friend, and there is the chance that you bought a house SHE found first, and there is a chance YOU did wrong, it's going to be tough for her to be happy for you, to pass by your/her house, to see you living in the house she wanted, she brought you to. It's best to beg forgiveness and be super careful not to go on about the house to her. Especially if the poor girl is still looking, or stuck in a house she settled for.
2007-03-10 15:59:26 · answer #5 · answered by WriterMom 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How true of a friend was she to get all bent out of shape because you bought a house she wasn't interested in? You weren't wrong, your entitled to buy anything you want to. I wouldn't worry about it, maybe someday she'll come back around, but if not just move on, not worth worrying about. By the way congratulations on your new house!!
2007-03-10 16:02:17 · answer #6 · answered by Suzie- Q 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yeah. It wasn't TERRIBLE but it wasn't very nice. You should have told her before you did it. Like the night before, call her and say, "Remember that little house. I'm going to offer blah blah for it, what do you think?"
I think that would have been respectful and thoughtful.
#1 rule of friendship: Never assume anything.
2007-03-10 15:59:25 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
To me it sounds like miscommunication between you and your friend. Maybe she didn't mean to covey her emotions so negatively towards the house, or perhaps she didn't want you to judge her on the quality of the house since it needed some repairs. All in all I wouldn't say you were wrong in bidding on the house, as long as you weren't avoiding telling her you were planning on it.
2007-03-10 16:01:30 · answer #8 · answered by yourname1999 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good grief! With friends like that you don't need enemies. You are not beholden to anyone, particularly someone who claims to be a friend and has made it clear that she is not interested in the house you like. You're better off without this person as she sounds like nothing but trouble. Move on!
2007-03-10 15:59:41 · answer #9 · answered by pianofritz2 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No you did the right thing by making an offer she said she was looking at other houses. Don't worry buddy shes the one that's in the wrong
2007-03-10 15:58:55 · answer #10 · answered by drewneemialover 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋