I dont think anyone will support my decision...?

Question

If I am pregnant I know my family will not support my decision to keep the baby. I dont live with any of my family but I dont want them to think Im being unrealistic or stupid. I mean I dont really care what they think but I wish someone could understand. The guy I am currently with is great but I dont know how he will feel if I am. I guess I'll have to tell him but Im only going to when I know for sure. Any advice on what I can do for help with the costs of having a child? Im positive he will help but I want to do as much as I can to take care of everything. I want everyone to see that I am responsible and I can handle this.

Answer 1

i got pregnant at 17 with my first child and you can have this baby and be a good mother and i understand your wish to keep it you should not have to get an abortion just because of your age abortion is a choice not something that you can be made to do

if your family does not support you right away in time they will come around it may be after the baby is born but they will still love you and they will love the baby

first thing you have to do is make sure you are pregnant and then sit down with the father and talk to him make sure he will be there for you and make sure he understands your decision to keep the baby

then you need a plan on where you will live how you will finish school and how you will support the baby

if you can show everyone on your plan and they will see you are responsible enough to be a mother then they will support you

if you need to talk e mail me OK

Answer 2

You are in over your head even though you want to be responsible and handle it all. It was hard for me to have a baby at age 28---and I had been married for 4 years. There is soooo much to having a child---more than you could ever imagine. I thought I knew it all at age 28-----I knew it would be hard...... but I tell you, only once my daughter was in my arms did I really "get it."

I cannot imagine doing it without support as a teenager. If your parents will not support you, you really will have a difficult time. Financially Uncle Sam will provide for you (a nice chunk is taken out of my paycheck each week to provide for unwed mothers on welfare.) BUT, it's the other stuff that will be ridiculously difficult without the support of your parents. You never know though, they might come around once they see their grandchild. You could maybe use adoption as a second option if they don't. Once they know their granchild would be given up for adoption, as the date gets closer, maybe they'd change their mind and help you out. You will need all the help and support you can get.

Answer 3

You sound reasonably mature and intelligent. In my town there is a program called "earn while you learn" You watch videos and complete worksheets for points. Points can be redeamed for baby related items. For instance, 20 points is a crib (about a $100 value). Check around to see if your area has anything simular. Also WIC can help you meet some nutritional needs. Your local DHS is probably the best place to start, most states have "insurance" for expecting women. The income guidelines are fairly high, too. Here you can make up to 2500 a month and still qualify. They may also have child care assistence. It's all worth looking into. Good Luck to you. And if you are not pregnant, birth control is usually free in most areas at your health department. If there is anything i can help you with or look into for you my email is [e-mail] and i would not mind trying to help you.

Answer 4

It depends how old you are but I do know how scary it is to tell your parents your pregnant. Most parents do come round though. I am the only daughter of two old fashioned parents and my mother was very ill at the time, it took a while but they spoil my daughter rotten now. As for the financial side of things I can only say it's really hard. You have to learn to budget strictly (I've never managed to do this I admit)
I think it's fantastic that you have decided to keep your baby and you sound like you are being realistic as you're already trying to sort out your finances.

Answer 5

Having a baby is a big step in anyone's life especially when you aren't married. I would suggest going to the health clinic (health department) or doctor and having a blood test to see if you are pregnant (these are more accurate than a home pregnancy test anyway). Once you know for sure you are pregnant or not talk to your boyfriend.
If you are tell him so and tell him you want him to support his child, etc....
If not still have a talk with him telling him you thought you were pregnant but aren't and just want to know what he plans to do in the future to prevent getting you pregnant. Suggest using condoms (they are free at any local health department).

If he doesn't want to take the step to prevent a pregnancy or won't support you when you are pregnant in the future and you don't want to be a single mom you should find another boyfriend. (Sorry for being so blunt)

If you are pregnant and he won't support you there are options. Go to a local women's clinic (such as planned parenthood or birthright) and they can show you your options, which they normally include as keeping it, adoption, and abortion (I hope you wouldn't choose the later though!)

Hope you get this solved soon! :)

Answer 6

Your best bet is to get a job after school and save up money to take care of yourself why you are pregnant and then after of course. Get health insurance if you don't have it already otherwise your doctor bills will be pretty high especially if you don't have health insurance. If you have cable and Internet and a cell phone then disconnect those services. Use the money for food, electricity, water, heat, and a car. Also if you can try to get your boyfriend to move in with you and get your own place.

Answer 7

First off, how old are you and do you have some kind of income to support a baby? There are lots and lots of resources out there to help you support a baby. There are gov. programs like WIC, food stamps, housing, and many more for you to utilize if you truly need these. Secondly, do not let anyone convince you to abort b/c this is murder any way you look at it. This little baby deserves life just as much as you do. If you feel like you can't support your baby, there's always the option to place your baby for adoption.

You need to do what you think is best for your baby. Don't let other people tell you what to do b/c this is your choice. I assure you that raising a baby is expensive(i.e. cost of clothing, baby furniture, food, etc....you get my point) time- consuming, and difficult at times. On the other hand, they are precious gifts of life and they do bring lots of joy to you. Go with your heart on this one.

Answer 8

What age r u?

And how do u know that u parents wont want u to keep the baby? People react very different to what u might think in this situation. Yes it might be a struggle, but do u really think they would want u to get rid of there grandchild? Tell them and see what happens but tell them u dont believe in killing ur baby.

Answer 9

why did you not add all of the info in your note this time as in the previous note about you being 17, and wanting to keep to keep the baby?
what are you currently thinking?
adoption, abortion, keeping the baby?
if it adoption, most places will pay all of your expenses
if is abortion, check around to see the costs
if you are keeping the baby, go tothe health department and apply for medicaid, and then go to planned parenthood top get on their last as well...you may want to try your church and they may be able to help you as well
good luck

Answer 10

I really don't have any experience in this department. But having an abortion is not something that you want to do. When you think about it it's like you're killing another person that could have an amazing relationship with. That's just my opinion. Don't be afraid to tell your mom. Thats what they're there for.