Was anyone actually cheated on and worked things out?

Question

Has anyone been cheated on, to what extent/reasons, and actually managed to work things out and have a decent relationship with that person. Or did you stay with them and get taken for a fool again?

Answer 1

I ask my self that question every day!

Answer 2

Been there, done that...
I left my husband 6 years ago, and cheated while we were separated. We started talking again, deciding if we could possibly work things out, and he cheated on me, mostly out of revenge.
We decided to give it another shot, about 3 months later. That was over 5 years ago, and though it was really hard in the beginning, we're still together. Not only are we together, our marriage is stronger and happier than it's ever been. We've seen the worst in each other, we've been through he!!, and decided that we still loved each other and wanted to make this work. I'm no longer concerned that he will cheat, and he's not worried about me cheating either. We looked carefully at what caused us to split/cheat the first time around, and have made changes to make sure we never get to that place again. If anything starts happening that concerns one of us (such as the other pulling away emotionally), we talk it out before it becomes a huge issue.
Repairing a marriage after adultery is far from easy, but it CAN be done if both partners are willing to give everything they have to the marriage, and willing to do whatever it takes to rebuild the trust that was broken.

Answer 3

I have to admit i was a victim, I can't seem to find a reason or an excuse that can be legit but I actually tried to work things out, and believe me it was no picnic in the park, If he was five minutes late my mind was running marathons of who and what and where. The trust was not there and would take eons to earn. In the end I tried to forget but was impossible.Just like the other person stated I became obsessive and invading his privacy just to catch him in a lie, and I got taken for fool.. more times then a care to remember.
So I believe that a cheater is always a cheater, and a person only changes when they want to not because they have to.

Answer 4

I would like to comment on this. Cheating is a symptom of some sort of emotional distress, the cheater hurts too. Everyone hurts. I don`t know what I`d do. If you love someone soo badly and still want to be with them, why not? Once you cross that line, and cheat, that pain stays with you forever. Unfortunately, people have lust, and fantasy. Sometimes when they cross that line once they never do it again. Maybe it wasn`t what they expected or they weren`t emotionally fullfilled...

Answer 5

No, thats something i could never forgive.
My friends have adifference of opinion on this one though, some of them think that if the person isnt happy at home then they are bound to stray and so it can be solved by creating a happier relationship.
But if it didnt work the first time why should it work the second time.

Answer 6

Stayed with him, and what a mess of a relationship that ended up being, I became the worlds most paranoid possoesive woman and it drove him into yet another girls arms again. Everytime we argued I would throw it at him, if he was late or didn't reply to my calls or messages I went mental and it was like a loop in my head all the time- 'what's he doing, whose he with' over and over again.
I know some people can forgive and forget, but I know for sure i don't fall into that catergory.

Answer 7

I only know one couple that managed to stay together after there was cheating. My friends husband cheated on her and she stayed I believe because she was afraid to leave. She couldn't stand having to work and care for herself so she stayed. Everyone else I know that had cheating in their relationships ended it. Once the trust is gone it is gone forever I believe.

Answer 8

We "tried" to work it out after SHE cheated a week before we got married. Of course I found out a week AFTER we were married.

After that, I also found out SHE had been addicted to Cocaine. I had NO IDEA! I put her through drug treatment and took care of her 2 kids (teens).

We tried to put the marriage back together, but, the pain I had inside often surfaced as retaliatory anger. I never struck her nor threatened too, but, we had some bad arguments. BAD ONES! I became hostile and maybe overtly threatening, but, I always walked out once I realized I was that mad.

I realized I could NEVER look at her with the same adoration, level, desire, the same again. She lost her standing with me as what I thought was the greatest woman in the world.

No it didn['t work out. We were DIVORCED within a year of the marriage. I filed.

Answer 9

my husband cheated on me 10 years ago and I stayed with him for two reasons 1) I still loved him and 2) I had nowhere to go. It still hurts when I think about it and when it just pops in my head.I told him I will never forgive him and I mean that.If I forgive him he might think that I am OK with what he did.We get along really good now. It is the hardest thing I have ever been through it took years to come to my senses

Answer 10

No. I was cheated on when I was dating and that was the end of the relationship. Now I'm married and I wouldn't cheat and I wouldn't stay with my husband if he ever cheated.

Answer 11

I know a woman who stayed with her husband after he cheated on her. They had been married almost 15 years. It takes a lot of prayer, some counseling, and forgiveness. They will celebrate their 30th wedding anniversary this year. With God all things are possible!