My girlfriend and I have been dating for 6 years already. I'm very much in love with her. She loves me also. We are both 19. She's 4 months pregnant. We are in our 2nd year of college. I still want to keep seeing her. I know I will be with her no matter what but I don't want to spend my money on our child. Isn't there anything we can do? I hardly have enough to even spend on my own stuff since I have to pay for college classes and class materials. Same thing with my girlfriend. I was wondering how come my girlfriend is starting to be a lot more needy? I treat her (as a queen) the same way as before she was pregnant.
2007-03-10 03:59:00 · 6 answers · asked by Ansem 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
hey u wanted the responsibility to have sex now have the responsibilyty to be a dad u sound really selfish saying something like that besides now that u have the baby everything is for the baby so u better start getting the idea that its not u and her alone thers a baby in the way so be a man take care of it
2007-03-10 04:06:59 · answer #1 · answered by moniquita 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't want to jump in with harsh words...but let me say this. You are now responsible for another life, one you helped create. If you weren't ready for that type of committment, then you shouldn't have been having sex. Isn't it amazing how one simple decision can change the course of your life? My advice is this: embrace this new life, and prepare for big changes. Yes, you will be spending your money on your child, by choice or by court order. Yes, your girlfriend will need you very much in this time, and for many years to come. I am currently pregnant, and believe me, the hormonal changes are immense! I need all the love and support I can get, and she deserves the same. I believe that you truly love her, and I belive that when your child is born, you will fall in love with him/her with an intensity that will cause your selfish feelings to diminish. Remember, most importantly, that this baby did not ask to be created, that was a decision made by you and your girlfriend. Do not punish your child for your decisions. You don't have to give up on your dreams of finishing college, just understand you may have to take a different route to reach that goal. I wish you and your family the very best.
2007-03-10 12:14:43 · answer #2 · answered by Sage 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When a women gets pregnant she can get very emotional,needy being one of those emotions,crying uncontrollably,along with being down right hateful at times are other emotions she might experience,you will experience these too, because most of them will be direct toward you,nothing personal,understand?As far as not having enough money to care for this child when he/she comes into this world,is hindsight,and you know what they say about hindsight being 20/20.You'll have to learn what sacrifices means and if you don't want to have more children you better learn what a condom is.Listen, we can't pick and choose when things happen in our life's especially when we don't apply the right definition to the situation,and I'm referring to the condom/birth control. Things, they just happen, and this did for a reason,once you see your small infant you will begin to understand where to start with sacrifices and it will likely be your point of view on this whole subject of not having enough.Congratulations on your new baby!!
2007-03-10 12:32:59 · answer #3 · answered by Sidetracked0260 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though you are over 18 years old and in college, it sounds as though you have never grown up. It is time for you to "man up" and face your responsibilities like a man. It is time for the both of you to deal with the consequences of your actions.
The two of you will need to have a long and responsible conversation over what will be the next step the two of you will take. Does your girlfriend want to keep the child? (because regardless of what you want, it is her body and her decision). Is she considering adoption as an option?
If she chooses to keep the child, you have no choice but to face the financial (and moral) responsibility to care for the child. The child is the only innocent victim in this scenario and deserves to be taken care of and protected.
You may need to face hard choices (giving up school for a while) to be able to provide for your child. The time to be selfish is over, you have to care for your child. It is also important to be there and care for your girlfriend as well, is she getting prenatal care?
Have you spoken to both of your parents yet? Even though the responsibility is the two of you, I think they deserve to know (especially if they have been paying for one or both of your educations). Their input will be important, and they may decide to help you guys, though remember they are under no obligation to do so -- the responsibility is yours.
I would start doing some research into prenatal and post natal child care, start looking for a means of support (either to your girlfriend and the child if you guys stay together or at least to your child if the two of you break up), and again, gro up and "man up".
2007-03-10 12:18:48 · answer #4 · answered by LewAR26502 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first off you are too you to be having a kid and your only solution to you problem now is either abortion or adoption. That is why you wear a condom (duh) now you put yourself in a situation where you cant afford a kid which they are expensive and you arnt even mature yet you havent even experienced life yet and dont even have a house or anything for you kid to grow up at. Good Luck. Oh and the needy thing your girlfiend is going through is normal in a pregnancy and there is nothing you can do to get rid of it.
2007-03-10 12:05:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yo, bro'. You have no choice. This is too funny! The law doesn't allow you to play and walk. You will "spend my money on our child". Get a grip and get two part time jobs and keep your pants zipped. Yo Mama.
2007-03-10 12:02:58 · answer #6 · answered by Lois M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋