i have 2 small babies. 6 years together. dh confessed to cheating 4 times within 2 month timespan with family friend due to our not having any sex. he confessed to me 2 weeks after he broke it off with her. tried to confess right away 2 times but i thought he was joking and he didnt have the guts. girl has gone pyscho. calling stalking. we had to change cell numbers, move, get a new job. she is fat old ugly missing teeth and im sure it was just sex, no emotion involved. she is doing her hardest to steal him from me actually telling him she wasnt gonna stop till she saw us broken up. she is now claiming to be 2 months pregnant and stalked me in my car pulled me over and showed me documents. however i have ties at the clinic who checked her file and she is not pregnant. she was pissed to find out dh had already told me everything. dh has since done a complete turnaround, agreed to counseling, quit drinking, no more going out without me, going to church, being better daddy and husband
2007-03-10 03:24:03 · 10 answers · asked by maylene1852 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
no u weren't wrong to forgive, especially since he told u the truth, and has shown remorse. looks as if u both have settled it, and he is more than willing to end it with this woman. it certainly took alot to get rid of her, guess he learned a valuable lesson here. but if he does it again, u need to consider ending the marriage, because it will than have turned into a pattern of behavior for him. he had a choice, he let his circumstances decide his behavior, he needs to have better self control. this woman could really be a danger to u and your family so best to be on the lookout for her lurking in the shadows.
2007-03-10 03:44:46 · answer #1 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is a decision only you can make in your heart. The answer board can't do it for you.
Do you believe he is sincere? Have him sign a fidelity contract as part of the therapy/counseling - spelling out what the ramifications will be should he cheat again. Your therapist should be able to assist you with this. Have it notarized - kind of as a post-nuptual agreement. Call the police and get a court order against the psycho ex-girlfriend.
Hubby will have to earn back your trust. I'm sure he realizes this.
2007-03-10 03:51:16 · answer #2 · answered by greyrider 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's your marriage, and your decision. Only you could decide. Ending a marriage should always be the last resort, and unless the love is gone, it's stupid not to try to repair yours. Having a psycho woman playing games isn't going to make things easier. I hope you can make peace with this, long term. Your husband may well have learned, by nearly losing you; how much you mean to him. I'd like to hope that's true, because that way, some good would come from all the pain you are feeling.
2007-03-10 05:12:33 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a tough question.
First of all we all know GOD is merciful and all forgiving.
Now having said that....if my husband cheated on me my initial reaction would be rage, anger, disgust, and disappointment.
I would hope my husband would be man enough to express his curiosity before he reacted upon them.
In other words...tell me things have changed before you cheat.
I can handle that better than my husband cheating and coming home like nothing ever happened. Trying to convince himself that he made a mistake, it was only one time, and it will never happen again.
Now say this cheating did happen and he told me or I found out.....I know I would have to eventually forgive him. But because I forgave him doesn't mean I will take him back. He broke the marriage sacred vows. Plus he was tempted by temptations.
So I would forgive him but we would still stay separated. Friends would probably be the best solution. I would always love him.
2007-03-10 06:24:23 · answer #4 · answered by ANJANETTE C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's never wrong to try to repair a broken marriage. You obviously love him (or you wouldn't have taken him back) and from what you wrote, it sounds like he's trying to change. Give it time for things to get better, and as hard as it may seem, try not to take your anger at her current behavior out on him... it's kind of hard to separate that from your marriage, since it was his actions that brought her into your lives.
I'm sorry you have to deal with this psycho, though... have you considered a restraining order against her?
2007-03-10 04:25:26 · answer #5 · answered by ~StepfordWife~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what is right for you and your family. If you have it in your heart to forgive and you really believe that he is going to change then you deserve it to your children to try to keep your family together. Trust your instincts and your heart. Keep an eye on him, hopefully he has turned over a new leaf permanently. Good luck.
2007-03-10 04:00:45 · answer #6 · answered by chanajane3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did the right thing he told you not right away but he finally did if the other woman keeps it up try to get a restraining order to keep her out of your lives.
And you will know in time if she is pregnant by him or not i not think she is but you never know
Good luck HUN
2007-03-10 03:49:32 · answer #7 · answered by Just Me 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you aren't wrong to give him a second chance, because you seem to have a loving heart. But don't let your guard down until months later, until you're sure that he has indeed turned his life around. Good luck!
2007-03-10 03:57:21 · answer #8 · answered by Braddah M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both partners need to "soul search" after a mishap like the one you describe. You may or may not realize you are the ONES for each other.
www.facing-abc.20fr.com
2007-03-10 04:07:21 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you aren't wrong.....good for you; he messed with a crazy women!
2007-03-10 03:53:00 · answer #10 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋