In May 2006 my mom met and started dating this guy. I didn't think much of it until October of last year he moved his stuff into our house. After moving his stuff into the house he went away and he returned last weekend. Since he returned last weekend he disabled the alarm system and was on the computer from 5:00 a.m. to 7:00 a.m. When I got on the computer after him he erased the history so no one could know what websites he was looking at, one day when I went to wash some clothes I caught him going through one of the storage closets down stairs. Since he has been here he has been making statements like "this is my house" he and my mom aren't even married. Everyone who sees him feels very uncomfortable around him. What can I do to ensure my safety. Because when I talk to my mom about him she takes his side. Please Help Me
2007-03-10 02:59:40 · 7 answers · asked by FeFe 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Look, the guy is probably a control freak, and I would not be surprised if things got worse before they got better. Make an escape plan. I would talk to a Friend or relative who lives close and wouldn't mind you showing up one night on some odd day or strange hour. You need to have a safe place you can go if things get bad. A safe place that you might need to go in a hurry.
Keep a bag/pack ready for stuff you may need, like extra clothes and a toothbrush (etc.) that you may need to take in a hurry.
2007-03-10 03:19:20 · answer #1 · answered by O 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are a lot of issues unmentioned here. But yes, I can see your point in saying you "think" this guy's dangerous. Have you ever tried to talk to him to see how he reacts to it? Some people with really intense psychological issues can tend to be polarized, openly too friendly one time or too secretive on another. I mean, until you've established, on top of that uncomfortable feeling, that he can be really dangerous, take a deep breath and relax a bit. Panic is not going to help you but it helps to be very aware about what's going on. What if he's just really wary about people because of some issues but really isn't the hurting kind? Not that I can judge that since I'm not there but hey, we can all be wrong at some time. Anyway, IF you find something that is extraordinary (and I mean extraordinary like violent reactions but without the battery involved yet), there's no reason why you can't get the opinion of any social worker or a pastor for guidance. You must not overreact. I think that should apply to things happening not just in your home but elsewhere. Be alert and level-headed.
2007-03-10 04:45:30 · answer #2 · answered by Kittsangel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old are you? Because the only way you can get out of this situation is to move out as soon as possible (and believe me, you want to, things will only get worse over time).
If you aren't eighteen yet, I recommend talking to your relatives and telling them the situation. Maybe you've got a grandmother or a great aunt who would let you stay with them for as long as it takes for your house to become safe again.
If you ARE eighteen, get out any way you can! You shouldn't have to suffer for your mom's mistakes in life, and believe me, she's going to make them no matter what you say. If you try to get her to break up with this guy and it actually works somehow, chances are she'll resent you for ending her relationship. The action that will speak the loudest to her is if you tell her that you don't feel safe at home and you want to remove yourself from the situation. When her life starts going bad because of her poor decision, that's when she'll be looking for somebody to blame, and you're not going to be around for it! You can say "I told you so."
Good luck!
2007-03-10 03:14:21 · answer #3 · answered by Stegosaurus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mom would desire to be questioning greater approximately your protection than her happiness. while you're over 15 you are going to be emancipated if the area is heavily risky. i'm a mom of a three twelve months previous, I left my husband because of the fact he instructed me that he needed that we did not have little ones and that he resented my toddler. My toddler comes first. She constantly will. while you're uncomfortable around him stay far off from him, bypass to a pal's abode... have sleep over, do not argue with him because of the fact he ought to be violent, the way you describe him he seems slightly risky. have you ever talked on your father? tell somebody, you ought to not would desire to stay in concern on your very own residence.
2016-12-18 09:58:39 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a counselor to confide in. You'll get a non-judgemental hearing ear, suggestions on things to do/try, and a record of your concerns. Maybe in time your mom and/or the bf may come with you and share their observations too (that should be interesting).
2007-03-10 03:05:00 · answer #5 · answered by Zeera 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm pretty sure that if you tell your mom, she's not gonna beleive it, I suggest for you to get surveillence system install in the house, of course without him to know, and you know now they got a lot of small ones, cordless, and just record whatever suspicious thing that he does, and I think you must tell somebody else in the family, they probably may be able to help you, good luck, and I hope nothing bad happens.
2007-03-10 03:08:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First and foremost know that what you are feeling is valid. Your instincts are waving red flags at you for a reason. I do not think you will find an answer here. Please go talk to a counseler, a clergy person, a police officer, your mom's friends, anyone and everyone until you find an answer.
2007-03-10 03:06:32 · answer #7 · answered by Bridghid 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋