My bf's friends don't like me. What should I do?

Question

Last night I went out with my bf, one my friends and some of his friends for some drinks. I thought everything was fine but then my bf suddenly decided that we had to go home and he was rly quiet and moody but said everything was fine so I just ignored his behaviour. The next morning he said he didn't want us to go out with his friends anymore but should just do things on our own. At first I thought he was just trying to tell me that he wanted some 'boy' time with his friends without me, but then he said his friends had been making fun of me, although he wouldn't tell me they had said. I'm not particularly bothered what his friends think as that's their problem and I've been perfectly nice to them and think they are probably just jealous as they're single and in their 30s while my bf and I are 21. I hate the way they've upset my bf though and think he should find some 'true' friends but at the same time don't want to leave him cut off from these supposed mates. Any advice?

Answer 1

I think you're right to ignore them hunny, they sound really stupid to me. Had the same problem when I started seeing my man four years ago. It turned out that they thought I wasn't good enough and thought that I would hurt him. Although it really upset me, I was always really polite and friendly when I was in their company and eventually they realised that they were in the wrong. I even had a few apologies. Remember men are weird buggers anyway. Go along with your boyfriend and do things on your own for a while. He also has to decide whether he cares enough to stick up for you and prove them wrong too. Good luck hunny. They're probably just jealous anyway.

Answer 2

They sound like bad friends and its a good sign that he was upset about it enough to take you home. He was being protective. I bet what they were saying were more like dirty things about you than actually making fun of you. My dad's bosses say **** about my mom and I to him bc they're jealous. My mom's a dime piece lol be flattered and ignore the haters. He'll get new friends.

Answer 3

It sounds to me like your boyfriend's friends are jealous. He seems to care too much about what they're saying about you. If he cared about you he'd wouldn't tolerate them saying whatever they are saying. Also if they were true friends to him they would respect who he's seeing. You are right, he should work on finding some real friends and not be hanging around people who get enjoyment out of saying negative things about other people. Tell him to stand up to his mates when they bad word you. If I were you I wouldn't want to go out with them again.

Answer 4

Do like your boyfriend suggested and just do your own thing.
You dont need to be wrapped up in his "so called friends" life's to make yours OK.
Let him have his fun with his mates
If you two go the distance in your relationship
eventually his friends will have no choice but to accept you.
For the age you say his friends are they seem very immature.
Do your own thing as long as you two are happy when you are together

Answer 5

well, it seems that your bf was sincere enough to leave the second he picked up on bad vibes. so that means he respects you and your feelings, but this is a situation that he's gonna have to work out for himself, cuz those are his collegues. now, if they are jealous, it's understandable cuz their " lone rangers", but thats no reason to disrespect you, or your relationship with your bf. so my advice is to keep a decent amount of space between those friends of his, and let them hear about you rather than see you, just lay low.

Answer 6

Actually I'm in the same position as you're b.f. I've had experience, a lot of experience with the whole "friends" situation, let me share one of mine,(Though I was and still am single) anyway, I was worried that I'll lose my b.f. (best friend) again, cause she keeps ignoring me, i mean we hang and she hardly talks at all, though despite all that, I'm gonna be who I am. I'm gonna confront her, and i did, and though she's quiet i think its a family problem of hers and i understand that.

My point is:
Don't care about what those "friends" of his say, they don't know you like he does and they have no right to do that, make fun of you or judge you, their jerks. And you're b.f. needs to talk to them too, he should tell them off 4 doing that to you, i mean your his girlfriend! you should dump him, how do you expect a guy to protect you if he can't even confront his so called "friends" who talk about you behind your back, no offense or anything but, you need to settle matters.

If i was in your position I'd say this:

"-----(name of your b.f.) , I need to know something cos i can't keep waiting, and i can't live this way forever, so tell me, who do you really care about, me or them?"

"Ask yourself this, which would you prefer, friends who back stab your own girlfriend or a girlfriend who cares about you? You have to choose cos i can't live like this.

Me or them?

Answer 7

Why don't you go ask them why they don't like you. I mean, they won't make fun of you without any reasons, right? Unless they just want to make fun of you, you know, for fun. Lol! But if you really love you boyfriend, and your boyfriend loves you, then you guys shouldn't mind them. Just mind your own business and tell them to just mind theirs as well!

Answer 8

Sadly, he can't change his friends and more than likely doesn't want to replace them either. Don't put yourself in the middle of this. He has choosen the right path, if they continue to bad mouth you to him, then he will dump their friendship, but if you start bad mouthing them he will lose you.

Answer 9

screw his friends, have fun with YOUR bf and YOUR own friends, dont waste ur time with those losers.