My spouse recently told me that having sex and getting off while watching porn are the same thing....just a release activity. I found it insulting. I truely don't care if he wants to watch a dirty movie, that's not why I was insulted. So, am I being overly touchy about it? Or did I just royally get dist'ed?
2007-03-08 22:28:20 · 17 answers · asked by Arlene06 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
What an awful thing to say! You are not being overly touchy at all. Porn is a release activity and so is sex with your partner to an extent, but sex with your partner is more than that. It is not the same thing, you are more than just a cumm bucket! He wouldn't be getting any sex from me with that comment, without a serious apology!
2007-03-08 22:41:34 · answer #1 · answered by RD 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
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2014-06-03 08:57:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Totally different things. When I watch porn it's generally just to release pressure in the pipes to keep from going insane when I can't get the real deal. When I am with a women it's far more personal and intimate, not to mention feels tons better.
To me it's like saying an old hamburger left out in the sun for 3 days found laying in the road is just as good as a fresh cooked steak.
I think he was just worried you would get jealous of the porn and tried to down play it by down playing all forms of sexual activity. Either that or he really thinks of women as nothing but a masturbation aid and in that case you can do far better.
2007-03-09 06:44:12 · answer #3 · answered by Unstable Mentality 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
While there may be some truth to it, since I don't find sexual intercourse particularily emotional like it's spouted it should be for women at least, I don't think what he said was at all very respectful. It was crude.
Second problem, who in their right mind finds masturbation just as good as sex?? I mean, sure there are times when you prefer masturbation over sex, that's normal, but it's entirely different! I'm willing to bet he's a selfish lover, you need to teach your partner how to please you, if he keeps his selfishness, he may become the type to get 'addicted' to pornography.
Then again sometimes men and women say things that sound and are a lot worse than they really mean. I know I suffer from foot in mouth syndrome at times. Is it possible that he wasn't thinking about what he said really meant?
Anyways, being upset about his comment is justified and I think you need to talk to him about it. While sex is a release activity, it's certainly not the same thing as masturbation.
2007-03-09 10:10:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you should feel dist'ed if he said making love and watching Porn were the same thing...having sex and watching Porn is just an activity. Decide how you want to feel about it. They might not come out and say it, but I think most men probably feel similar about this issue as your husband does.
2007-03-09 06:34:36 · answer #5 · answered by Mangomum 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it isn't the same thing...well maybe for him it is. When a porn habit gets in the way of a normal sex life, it becomes a huge problem because he is not being totally committed to you. If you were to not give him any, you would not be doing your "wifely" duties". Same applies. This doesn't mean you actually have to do it, but tell him that if he doesn't start "being a husband" to you, you may have to go find it elsewhere. If he doesn't have a problem with that, I say go find it from a divorce attorney.
2007-03-09 06:43:30 · answer #6 · answered by sassynsweet1221 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It sounds like your spouse was in a particularly bad mood the day he told you that and was trying to hurt your feelings, wouldn`t you say?
Ask him again when he`s in an amorous & romantic mood and listen attentively to his answer.
I bet he won`t say that lovemaking & porn are the same thing at all!
How can he even think such a thing, let alone say it out loud and to his wife as well?!?
We both know the truth; that`s what matters after all, right?
Good luck to both of you & if things don`t improve dramatically between your spouse and yourself, seek marriage counselling!
2007-03-09 06:40:46 · answer #7 · answered by Devilish Angel 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Having sex and watching porn are two totally different items. When your spouse has sex with you, it's a way of him to earn your love but when he watches porn, he 'lives' in fantasy land. He fantasizes more as he watches more porn.
2007-03-09 06:35:49 · answer #8 · answered by superb2dmax 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if you join in. Watching porn while having sex is a good thing. Sex isn't dirty. But it is something that should be kept in your own bedroom.
2007-03-09 07:43:05 · answer #9 · answered by felippie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got insulted. Porn and sex with your wife are not the same things. Basically he just called you a vehicle for masturbation. (IE. - c*m dumpster)
There are many avenues to take concerning how to respond to such slander. I feel that I would not respond kindly.
2007-03-09 07:57:09 · answer #10 · answered by Poppet 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋