what is he really trying to say...why does he say he loves me but doesnt want o marry me ...ive known him for about 10 years
2007-03-08 18:13:47 · 30 answers · asked by amor_dove 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Not a Heck.
He means to say that before marrying you, he wants to establish himself, prove himself and create his worth. Don't you want him to be an achiever before he marries you ?
You will find all sorts of opinions here, but be positive. He means therefore he says, it is not difficult for him to tell you he doesn't want to marry you, if he is saying if he did, it would be you. So, believe your guy
2007-03-08 18:19:34 · answer #1 · answered by Goldman 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
What he's really saying is that he's an absolute loser and a pathetic excuse for a man. I have a friend who literally wasted her entire 20s in a relationship like this and I still don't think she's married to him or anyone else because she is so emotionally all about him. All the other guys she could have been involved with stay away from her like miles away because of the emotional bondage she is under with this guy. Who wants to get involved with a girl who is emotionally intwined with a guy - for 10 years? What he's trying to say doesn't matter - it's his actions that count and he's showing the maturity of an eighth grader and a heart of stone. Do you really want to turn 40 or 50, miss out on having a family and kids because of this loser of a guy who has stolen your heart? You're beyond time to drop him like a rock to the bottom of the ocean girl! Give the right guy a chance. The funny thing about my friend is that she is like gorgeous like a model and the guy is a disgusting old fart 18 years her senior. You're a woman - you're strong - you can do this - you are overdue for a fresh start - unless you want to become an old maid. Looking back - I'm the winner - because I avoided even being friends with that guy because I saw what he was doing to my friend but she wouldn't listen to me about him thinking like - I was going to go after him or something - such nonsense. Now I'm married with kids and happy at that and my friend is miserable wishing she just took my advice when she was 6 months into it with this guy!
2007-03-09 02:22:03 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The fact that you mentioned he is an on and off boyfriend seems a little suspicious. Have you ever seen the movie, "When Harry Met Sally"? A lady dates a man for a long time who says he loves her but doesn't want to marry her. She breaks up with him for this reason and he marries the next woman who comes along. He wants you to stay with him, implying to you the hope of someday being what he wants and getting him to settle down but if it's been this long I wouldn't count on it. Try asking him exactly why he doesn't want to get married. If you truly do want to get married someday, don't book your hopes and dreams on the chance that he'll come around. It might be time to find someone else who loves you enough to make a sound commitment.
2007-03-09 02:20:12 · answer #3 · answered by Aphrodite 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i am going thro the same problem...
me and my girlfriend have been dating on and off for way to long it seems... and Today we split up(again) i love her very much and hope this will work out... so i believe us (REALLY) taking a long break would do one of 2 thing... either way it would push out situation
1. find out if we only in love with each other because of the sex... and we don't want to admit it(frown)
2. We didn't have the feelings necessary for a life time of love(if you get me)
so take a break from each other.. that don't mean to start dating but go out dance and have a good time.. at the end of the night you may still wonder if he is thinking of you to, but marriage is all about the future... so if he is the one you both will know
2007-03-09 02:29:39 · answer #4 · answered by Weirdo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, he has his cake and the cow gives milk without owning it and he doesn't have to commit does he? Hummm I would be more worried about why you are still hanging on to this guy that doesn't have enough guts to tell you the truth but uses you because he can and why you allow it ? the problem is you , not him. He has it made and he knows it. What have you got besides being used? Sorry, I'd move on to the next one and make sure he's the kind that commits. At least in a reasonable amount ot time we can't live forever.
2007-03-09 02:24:46 · answer #5 · answered by MISS-MARY 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he is "on-and-off" shows a lack of commitment on any level. Sure he would marry you. No one else is going to put up (10 years) with his unresolved issues. Bottom line: He does not want to marry you because he is not in love with you.
2007-03-09 02:25:03 · answer #6 · answered by Monsieur Rick 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thats really sad to hear,
i am sorry
some males...ugh i just want to strangle them
They know how to push the wrong buttons very well dont they
its been 10 years, and its been on and off..and he claims he doesnt want to get married..doesnt sound too good..
maybe he is going through a midlife crisis
im not really sure..i dont know how a males mind works
2007-03-09 02:22:56 · answer #7 · answered by LostMyMind 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't want to get married... This is all he means. I'm sure he loves you in his own way; but loving someone does not equal wanting to marry them. He wants to be single, but still have a woman around - and he prefers having you around to having some other random woman around.
2007-03-09 02:32:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either he really doesn't believe in marriage or he's letting you know, w/out really saying it, you're not the one. You'll find out if you break up w/ him and he marries someone else. He has to tell you he would marry you if he wanted to get married because he's keeping you dangling from a string. he doesn't want you to end it.
2007-03-09 02:17:47 · answer #9 · answered by uknowme 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he is being honest, and he doesn't really want to marry. (period) or he is waiting for the right person to marry.
As long as you feel good it's fine. Enjoy your relationship until you can, if you still have the desire to marry, you might have to find someone who will marry you. I won't spend time trying to convince him.
2007-03-09 11:26:15 · answer #10 · answered by PRLadyDama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋