Im a mother of 2 and all too often, my and my partner dont understand each other, we always snap at each other, most of the time we are fighting and cold with each other, the sex is good, thats where we see eye to eye, but thats not what i want. what i want is for us to be harmonius. It has come to a point where we treat each other coldly and we always threaten to leave each other. im not happy anymore, and im sure he's not happy too. though we love each other so much.. what should i do ?
2007-03-08 14:58:57 · 17 answers · asked by Xiao17 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First of all, quit threatening to leave. Secondly, stop acting like teenagers with the cold shoulders and approach your difference from a nonjudgemental standpoint; it might take some time to get there, but it's always worth it.
Harmony is overrated, but constant uncertainty is demoralizing. You and your partner need to sit down and iron out what is setting each of you off--what you might think is constructive he might think is aggressive/critical--and find a way to deal with your issues that is acceptable to BOTH of you.
2007-03-08 15:25:19 · answer #1 · answered by shoujomaniac101 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit down with your partner and ask what is going on in your relationship and that you aren't happy with the way you's have been treating each other lately. It's all good for the sex but sex doesn't make a relationship work, you need communication & understanding each others needs as well. To be harmonious you both need to be working at this relationship and trying all the time to keep it together, if it's only one person working at it, it won't last.
2007-03-08 15:06:17 · answer #2 · answered by jimmy_chick78 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if neither of you are happy and aren't nice to each other then the relationship has probably run it's course. sorry to say it, but for everyone's sake it would be better to part as friends than enemies. it was fun while it lasted and take some time out to develope the relationship w/ your kids and take some me time. sometimes as women we think we just have to have a man. well unless you know who you are and are happy w/ yourself you won't be able to make or keep someone else happy. look at this as a new chapter in your life and a new you. this is why you shouldn't live w/people w/o the benefit of marriage. there's no real commitment. i hope it all works out. take care.
2007-03-08 15:14:04 · answer #3 · answered by freedom fighter 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you could do is sit and talk with him.
You've gone to far in this relationship to give up on it. You should set up an agreement with him that you want to start fresh.
Do little romantic things to keep the love alive. Start celebrating your monthly anniversary and buy a little something for eachother...keep it 10 bucks or less.
Go through the photo albums of you guys and the kids.
Set up a night of doing what you like and alternate with him...most of all get to the root of the problem and fix it from there.
If not then its just a booty call with your baby daddy.
2007-03-08 15:14:59 · answer #4 · answered by d_miano81 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you are both in bed and before you turn up the temperature, hold him close and tell him that you love him deeply. Tell him you want to stay with him but there are issues that you both need to address. Tell him that the sex is magic but you want more than that, you want to love his mind and well as his body and you want him to do the same. You have to talk through the issues and bed seems a place where you can be happy and communicate
2007-03-08 15:03:39 · answer #5 · answered by smilingtalker_au 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is not always enough for a relationship to last. Happiness should be more important with the way things are these days to make things work out.
2007-03-08 15:04:56 · answer #6 · answered by msthinkpositive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From what you said I really don't think you love each other I think you are just satisfied and comfortable in the situation. If your always fighting other than sex then that in itself should tell you something. You yourself said you weren't happy. Have or will you guys try marriage counsling? Try speaking to someone in church, friends, family going out to do things and sharing time together?
Try something else other than what you have been doing.
Good luck to you both.
2007-03-08 15:05:48 · answer #7 · answered by Clara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just a thought, try to put one another in the others place. see what the other is trying to do or say. we usually take things the wrong way, so we strike back with something just as bad. so the next time he makes you angry and you want to say your such a asshole! say instead.. i can see your upset right now did i do something to make you angry? if so im sorry that wasn't my intention, i apologize. see what happens from there. good luck to you.
2007-03-08 15:13:22 · answer #8 · answered by sassy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I get what you are talking about. You need some yin to go along with your yang. For this to work you need to be opposites. Maybe this is why you two are fighting all the time.
So quit fighting it and accept the yin yang.
2007-03-08 15:09:27 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to a specialist, o and keep the sex going
2007-03-08 15:02:53 · answer #10 · answered by coool2free 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋