and my dughter bridal shower is coming up. i do not what to invite her, but for some reason her father found out and he is upset, because he has paid for half of the wedding, what can i do, since i don't want her there
2007-03-08 14:08:47 · 19 answers · asked by ethie c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Ethie, if I understand right. You are married to this woman's ex-husband. I hope no one says sounds like a Springer episode. You could be the "bigger person" and invite her, look at this way-it's good practice for the wedding day.
Honey, everyone's nerves are on edge, and unfortuantately as the mother of the bride you are the ring master of this circus. You can either have a big flop with everyone mad at each other, and possibly ruin your daughter's most important day...or be the peace maker. The father of the bride should be a little more understanding about your feelings, but if you are happily married to her ex, and he's happy with her...ya'll need to learn how to get along for the kids sakes.
You will be dealing with people for the rest of your lives, so it's your decision how you handle it. I am not about to tell you what to do, just trying to give you another way at looking at it.
Happy wedding day, Mom. It's exciting isn't. Get plently of rest, and remember it's your baby girl's day. Make it the most special for her-not you.
God bless us all..................
2007-03-08 15:15:51 · answer #1 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not about you it is about your daughter. Your ex husbands wife is now your daughters step mother. You need to get over it and keep peace for one day. Why would you deliberately cause your daughter such negative stress at what is supposed to be such a happy time.
The only person who has the right to "not want her there" is your daughter and then she needs to be mature enough to justify that decision to her father and step-mother.
I suppose you wouldn't want this women around "your" grandchildren too? You are being very very selfish not to mention childish. Maybe you should pay for the whole wedding.
2007-03-08 22:33:20 · answer #2 · answered by RaLoh 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not up to you. It's up to your daughter. Just for this time around your daughter's wedding, you should make an effort to at least be cordial, as everyone should.
Thank your lucky stars that you are now with someone that you truly love. I'm sure that none of the four of you (the exes) are thrilled about having to be in such close proximity, but everyone should make an effort to get along for just this time as a gift to your daughter. Who knows? It may turn out that it's not as difficult as you think and could open all of you up for better times when you all have grandchildren.
2007-03-08 22:31:02 · answer #3 · answered by stseukn 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's not about you, it's about your daughter. What does she want? And if he's fronting half the wedding, then both he and his wife deserve equal treatment. Sometimes the RIGHT thing to do isn't always the easiest thing to do. Stop being selfish and lazy and think about your daughter's needs and wants--like she needs family drama added to the stress of planning a wedding!!!
2007-03-08 23:35:32 · answer #4 · answered by shoujomaniac101 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should suck it up and be a grown up! This is about your daughter, it is HER bridal shower and if she gets along fine with her stepmother then she should be invited too. You should be ashamed of yourself. You're supposed to be setting a good example as her mother. Her father has paid for everything and his wife should partake in the festivities. You should seriously put aside your differences for one day for your daughter's bridal shower and put her needs ahead of your own petty conflicts.
2007-03-08 22:16:29 · answer #5 · answered by lovin' life... 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like a confusing situation.
While you dont want her there its only right to invite her. Tell her since she is married to your daughters father that she needs to help with the cost for the wedding shower, and all the things to make it the best wedding shower.
Or Invite her for the WRONG day or the WRONG time.
ask your daughter what she wants .. it is her wedding shower.
Good Luck
2007-03-08 22:19:05 · answer #6 · answered by baby_thumper_girl 2 · 0⤊ 4⤋
You and your husband need to make an effort to satisfy your daughter for HER special day. It's only for a few hours, and it shouldn't be that difficult to do. How did that happen anyway, were all of you friends before marriage?
2007-03-08 22:28:01 · answer #7 · answered by msthinkpositive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
invite her
make like shes not there
for your daughters sake
you have to so it
she will be at the wedding so just suck it up
2007-03-08 22:55:42 · answer #8 · answered by zachsgrammy1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your ex is paying for half the wedding so he gets half the priviledges and that includes having his wife by his side.
2007-03-08 22:19:21 · answer #9 · answered by LolaCorolla 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
seems like you have all been chummy in the past; might as well get use to it, you'll be seeing more of them as time goes on and grandchildren come on the scene. Smile and be nice and mingle with your guests.
2007-03-08 22:16:08 · answer #10 · answered by abc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋