I do everything for my wife, pay for her to go to school, bills, whatever she needs romance and all. What should I do she is obsessed with yahoo q&a and myspace and not me.
2007-03-08 12:31:02 · 13 answers · asked by Sinful_Nature 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
First of all, slap yourself in the head.
Your first question was good. How do i Get my wife interested in ME. But your comments showed the entire problem - you have made yourself nothing but an extension of her that enables her life. Why would she be interested in you! You're just a tool for her!
That's nice that you do things for your wife. Do you think that turns her on? Seriously? I mean is that how it works for you, if some woman pays for something for you and does your errands, do you get physically aroused? I don't think so!
Stop being your wife's servant. You don't need to be an a jerk. You don't need to stop being a decent guy. But stop trying to do whatever she wants. Be a good husband, on your terms. THen take the rest of your time and energy and work on yourself. Go to the gym, get in better shape, start dressing better, go out more, make new friends, work on hobbies. Before you were married, you were probably an interesting guy who she WANTED to be with. You've stopped being that guy. You need to become him again. Worst case - you're better looking, and going out more and having more fun. Best case - all of the above, plus your wife starts being interested in you again.
Finally, don't sit around waiting for your wife. Start changing yourself, but also start just grabbing what you want. Don't sit around pouting because she's on myspace. If you want sex, walk up to her and start undressing her. If she says no, she says no, don't pout, just go do something else. The _worst_ thing you can do is just try to do everything she asks, hint you want sex, then pout if you don't get it. I mean seriously, does that sound attractive to you?
2007-03-09 02:56:15 · answer #1 · answered by kheserthorpe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your are one of the nice guys. The saying goes "Nice guys always finish last". Just because you are so nice.
Reality check. ITs nice of you to be everything you are to your wife, but there is no challenge in your relationship. Its completely secure & comfortable, which is great, but your relationship needs some more zip to it. You are giving her everything, without her having to work for it, just like a kid. She hasn't learned the value of actually getting something herself (she doesn't know the value of what you are giving her). You just give and give and give and she just takes and takes and takes.
I can understand why she is obsessed with Q & A. It's interesting, it gives her excitement, its a change for her, it gets the adrenaline pumping. Its very interesting and if I can help someone out it makes me feel good, sharing the knowlege we have about different things.
She can depend on your for whatever without any resistance and it actually gets boring and its a turn off. My BF was a sweetheart, the same as you, would do anything for me, but it turned me off after awhile. I have overcome my situation because I worked on it and we both discussed it.
But that's why nice guys finish last. Try alittle bit of resistance, instead of you pursuing her all the time, step back some, let her come to you for attention and let her pursue you. She'll start to miss you if your busy going your own thing - like where is my husband, what's he doing, etc It will get her to start to notice you again.
The only thing with the computers is that they can get addicted. I found out about this site just 1 month ago. I do have control over how much time I spend on Q & A, but your wife might have a problem with it.
2007-03-08 13:10:32 · answer #2 · answered by Nemo 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, I would ask her why she spends so much time on the net when it is obvious that she has someone that really loves her. The net should not take the place of a spouse. Do you think that she married you for what you can do for her? How long have you been married? and how long has this been going on? I would suggest that you sit down and talk to her to see where her head is. If you feel comfortable with the answers that she gives you, I then suggest that you ask her directly what she needs or wants from you because from your question, you give her everything. There are plenty of women who would love to have a husband like you. Hope all goes well.
2007-03-08 12:44:00 · answer #3 · answered by imhischildtwo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my husband had the same problem for awhile. I was on here all day for like two weeks and then i got tired of it and now I only do a few questions a day. he started to act like he didn't mind it and cheered me when i got a best answer. then i gave him more attention. i don't know why but i guess it is because we had a few days where we only seen each other for a few minutes and i left right after he got home and after a few days we just spent more time together.
good luck
2007-03-09 01:09:05 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unplug the computer and get it out of the house! Seems simple enough to me. You may think that you are meeting her needs but obviously you aren't. Get counseling either as a couple or go by yourself.
2007-03-08 13:05:35 · answer #5 · answered by mamabear1957 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I just had to answer, because I thought you were MY husband! Let's just say Yahoo Answers and March Madness has really put a damper on our closeness. Good luck!
2007-03-08 12:36:22 · answer #6 · answered by momof2 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
what do you do while she is on the computer?
maybe things are not as good as they seem to you. maybe you should talk to her about what she needs. you may be surprised at her response.
good luck!!
2007-03-08 13:12:10 · answer #7 · answered by slow thinker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
poor fellow, I feel for you. I hate it when the internet interfers with relationships.
2007-03-08 13:13:05 · answer #8 · answered by Bu Tran 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Slam your member in her long and repeatedly until she achieves multiples.
2007-03-08 12:37:06 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Those are my 2 addictions!!
There is no hope.
2007-03-08 12:42:47 · answer #10 · answered by Lisa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋