Why do people with kids think that people who choose not to have kids are selfish?

Question

I think it's more selfish to want to have little replicas of yourself running around and showing them off like they're some kind of trophy.

Answer 1

For the record, I love my little 'replicas'!

That being said, I do think it is a very responsible decision people make to not have children! There are plenty of people who have children because they are expected to or because it just happens. I have a girlfriend who said flat out she was too selfish to have children. I have a huge amount of respect for that! There are many other reasons out there to not have children, though.

It is always good to look at both sides of things and not create a big stereo type. I am guessing a large portion of parents don't automatically think 'that people who choose not to have kids are selfish.'

Answer 2

Ok both perspectives are a bit extreme.

If you dont want kids its your choice. If you are confident in your choice, then why do you care what others think?

People have kids for many reasons, not just to have trophies to show off. The survival of the human race is not possible if people do not have kids.

Answer 3

I have 1 child and i dont believe people who choose not to have them are selfish. It is more selfish to have kids and not want them after they are born. The parent will resent having that child for the rest of their life.

As for me, no im not selfish. Having a child is a life altering experiece that involves self sacrifice and perseverance. If you are not willing to self sacrifice then that person should not have children.

Children are a blessing - but only for the right people who want them.

Answer 4

I know its silly. like Barbara Boxer thought condoleeza was going to be selfish because she didnt understand what it was like to have kids, now thats silly! And also I absolutely hate it when I hear people say "a legal marriage is not just between two people who love each other, but with two people who love each other and can have children." as an anti-gay marriage statement. excuse me! but we certainly dont have a shortage of children, a couple who cant give birth to children is a good thing!

Answer 5

Excellent question! I am not a kid person at all. I never have been. In Jr. High, my friends were babysitting for mall money and I wasn't b/c I just don't like kids.
When I tell people that I probably won't have any, they get all nasty w/ me. I try to explain to them that I just don't have the patience and understanding for kids and somehow, they rationalize that I should have them anyway. (?)
Yikes.

Answer 6

I don't think they are selfish at all, they shouldn't have kids if they really don't want them, I see it everywhere,kids are ignored. I have 2 children and they were very wanted, I have childless friends too.

Answer 7

Personally I think it's that they are miserable and want others to be miserable as well. The same for those who push happily UNMARRIED people towards marriage.

Some people believe that what they personally have or believe is the ONLY right way.

Answer 8

I don't think it's selfish not to want to have kids. It's better to know you don't want kids early on instead of having one and then finding out you don't want them.

Answer 9

I have to agree with Haley. Children are gifts from God so there is no way to think that it is selfish to want them. Children are very precious and innocent and full of love.

Answer 10

They feel as though we must carry on somehow by making babies. I think people don't know what they would do without children to take of. And when they are young they are imagining themselves as parents.