we split just over a year ago, i read his emails and found out he was a member of a bisexual/gay exploration website, he wasnt just a member he had been speaking to these men in a sexual way
i know i was wrong to read his emails
we finished
iv been bumping into him recently and weve been chatting
he has explained he was just exploringa and was curious
he was 16 at the time
is this an acceptable exuse?
i love him so much
i cant stop thinking of him
but another problem
my friends and family dont approve of him because they know what i went through when we split
does all of this mean anything? when i do love him?
thanks
2007-03-08 11:46:17 · 21 answers · asked by clairehudson1990 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
maybe he is hurt by you and wants to be gay. No more girls for him.
2007-03-08 11:59:35 · answer #1 · answered by Jagger Otto 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether or not he is gay is no important. He was 16 when you split up so now he is 17? And now you are what 16 or 17. You need to realize that at your age this is just a teenage infatuation and most likely won't last anyway. Finish High School, go to college, get an education and a career. When you are 25 you might want to start looking for a real relationship with a stable guy that doesn't play games, and has a life course for himself figured out. Date for at least 3 years before even thinking about getting married and I promise you you will have a better life than you can even imagine. I've seen so many of my friends that have screwed up their life by getting married too early, getting hooked up with the wrong person, and having kids way too young. The people I know that have had succesful relationships and lives are the ones that waited. Wait. It's worth it.
2007-03-08 11:57:12 · answer #2 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No one besides this fellow can really say whether he's gay or not. He may be honest with you, or not. He may not even be honest with himself. It's possible he was going through a phase, but not likely.
You don't make it clear: is he trying to get back together with you? You with him? Regardless, why did you two split up? If same incompatibility that was there before is here now, you shouldn't try to get back together. I'm not asking what *caused* the break-up. The "cause" may have been something very small, separate from the real reason.
Even if the reason has changed, his "curiosity" is a good indication that he's confused. You're not likely to change that.
Stay away.
2007-03-08 11:59:55 · answer #3 · answered by Nate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may of told you he was just curious, but his act of having actual conversations with other men, most likely, he is gay. You did not turn him this way. His actions are pointing that he is very confused with his sexuality. I would hate for you to be hurt in the end when he chooses his preference. I would be friends with him but you can't turn him from being gay. If he is, he will always be. You can't change that, no matter how much you would want to. There is nothing wrong with you except that your a girl to him. Don't take it personally, and don't set yourself up for disappointment. Good Luck
2007-03-08 11:55:04 · answer #4 · answered by hbuckmeister 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What are you trying to ask here? If it's OK to love a man who's bi-sexual? Well then that's up to you. Can you handle being with a man that has slept with another man (if he actually did go all the way)? Are you feeling weird because you love a man who may be bi-sexual? You can love him all you want, but again, you have to ask yourself if you can handle being with a man that has slept with another man. Do you think there's a chance that he will go out with you again? And I think your family and friends will understand - lots of people have bad break-up's then later get back together. Or do they not approve because they know his sexual orientation? I think you have to ask yourself some hard questions sweetie. And most importantly, be honest with yourself when answering them.
Good luck!!
2007-03-08 11:55:09 · answer #5 · answered by lanibear55 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably is exploring his sexuality. As far as what he put you through while you were together, do you want someone back that is going to hurt you? There are so many nice guys out there who know what they want. Just shop around a little bit.
2007-03-08 11:51:30 · answer #6 · answered by nutnut1957 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm. He may have just been exploring. I've read about stuff I would never do. But, maybe he experimented during your time apart and decided he wasn't bi after all.
Either way, if he has had any sex partners.. male OR female... since your breakup, you should demand an HIV test. You both could take one.
2007-03-08 11:50:35 · answer #7 · answered by Yinzer from Sixburgh 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first off, if you slept with him, get yourself tested. second, go TALK to the boy!! no harm ever came from talking to anyone - at least, not like this - so i would go talk to him and see what he says....i wouldn't do anything/judge anything until you know all of the facts....then make your decision. it's not a crime to think that you love someone at your age. just take things slowly....now, take a deep breath, let your heart stop pounding and wonder, and go talk to the boy!!
2007-03-08 12:00:21 · answer #8 · answered by amymrgrt 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As he was 16 wouldn't that just be bi & gay curious I mean he might of thought about it and decided to see what it was all about. And how he felt about it all.
Also if he is gay what is it to you and your disapproving family
2007-03-08 11:52:53 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
he has every right to be curious..at 16 people should be experimenting and soul searching...i don't get why you're still in love with him if ya broke up over a years ago
2007-03-08 12:08:51 · answer #10 · answered by lata 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
HE'S GAY!!! trust me.... no straight guy would EVEN THINK about chatting or emailing other guys sexually. Move on. He's not worth it. You'll only end up breaking your heart.
2007-03-08 21:08:15 · answer #11 · answered by monika 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋