I'm a teenage mother and having bad feelings towards my daughter. Could anyone please help?

Question

Hi all ;)

My name's Dinah, I'm 19-years-old and the mother of a beautiful baby girl, Hazel-Marie. Hazel-Marie's father, my ex-boyfriend, kicked us out of his apartment recently and, since then, we've been living at my parents' house. I love my daughter more than I could have ever imagined, but lately I've been going through some depressive emotions about the break-up and actually find it hard at times to be around Hazel-Marie.

So what I'd like to know is if this behavior is bad and should I get professional help or is it just a stage? Thank you so much for your replies, have a nice night ;)

Answer 1

Seek professional help, talk to your ob/gyn, it could be post partum depression or it could be a bout of depression after the break up. You're doing the right thing by realizingyou have a problem and have the opportunity to get it under control before it becomes a big problem. Either way you need to go see someone. Maybe a therapist that you can just talk to, sure you have Mom and dad there and I'm sure their a great help to you, but there are things that you probably don't want to talk to them about. Just remember that you are strong and you'll get through this. You have people around you that care about you and you have a little girl who will love you forever.

Answer 2

Please get help. You may be experiencing postpartum depression or you're just tired and stressed by the demands of being a single mom with a new baby. I can't imagine being a single mom at 19. Ask your parents for help. Everyone needs a break sometimes, even if it's only for 15-30 minutes. I had my first child at 26 and my husband worked 70 hours per week. My family lived several states away and it was only my daughter and me most of the time. Even the most patient mothers can become tired and stressed and need help. I would talk to your doctor as soon as possible. Maybe join a support group with single moms your age that may be feeling the same way. It's better for you and your daughter if you get help and start dealing with what is causing you to feel this way. If you are ever completely overwhelmed then put her in her crib and take your own time out until those feelings you are having subside. Good luck!

Answer 3

It's going to be alright Dinah, My name is jessica and i am a young mom too, when I first found out I was pregnant I had already been dumped by my boyfriend(who was the father too) and I felt like I didn't want my baby. But as my pregnancy progressed I began to be excited about being a mother. If you still feel this way in a few weeks then you should seek out help. In the mean time just be glad that your parents are supportive and wait it out i'm sure you can work through this emotional time in your life. Remember Hazel-Marie will always love you (you're her mommy), even if no one else does.

Answer 4

Dinah darlin, you've clearly been through a great deal for a young girl of 19. Kudos for you in returning home and taking the rearing of your daughter seriously. You sound a bit burned out and a little counseling could help put you back on track, or joining a single parenting group to share your feelings. Sometimes, with someone so young, you may feel resentful of this little life invading your own youth - but these are the choices you have made and its good you recognize that you need to be responsible now to your daughter.

You sound lonely, so consider getting a little counseling and joining a single parenting group. I think it may help you...

Goodluck dear and again, I applaud your dedication to motherhood and taking this matter seriously.

Sincerely,

Grace

Answer 5

Sounds like you're having a hard time. I would honestly focus on the happy things in your life- your beautiful daughter being one of them. She doesnt deserve for you to treat her differently because of what's happened. It's absolutely not her fault. If her Dad wants to be that way toward you, then take it up with him. Remember this: You can always find someone else to love you and maybe one day become your husband, but Hazel will only have one Dad. She will suffer enough with the situation he has made. So, try and be the security in her life and the person that will always hold her up. Set a good example for her and in the end you will see how rewarding it will be to have a happy child.

Answer 6

you didn't mention how old your daughter was it could be postpartum depression. Just note you are NOT alone. Alot of mothers harbor feelings like this. It is when you act on them it can become a problem. I would definitely find a counselor or a therapist to talk to. I too was a teenage mother. Let me say it is not easy. You hang in there. For you and Hazel-Marie.

Answer 7

I think strongly that you should talk to someone about your sudden depression although it seems common, thats an illness that can have many reprocussions. i wouldn't want that anger towards your baby girl turning into abuse. if its depression your going through your emotions are a time bomb right now she might do something a child her age would do but because your feeling some kind of way she might get the short end of the stick... no what i mean?? as for her dad try to see if you can get child support might as well get some of what you can any lil bit helps. if he can put you and your baby out (in the winter) then he can pay extra cash!! dont stress doll be blessed, the best is yet to come no one ever said its going to be easy but hold your head up and keep it moving for dauhgter's sake right now your all she's got.!!

Answer 8

All teenager go through a depression stage and mothers get depressed all the time. This is completly normal. I'm sorry about your ex kicking you out. I hope you and your daughter are happy. remember, always keep your hopes up! being a teenage mother must be hard but nothing is impossible. good luck!

Answer 9

Of course it is normal! I know I would feel the same way too. You need alone time but obviously can not get it when your taking care of your daughter. Your ex has freedoms that you do not, and lets be honest, it stinks having to put a smile on when you just want to scream!

Talk to your parents if you feel comfortable with that or definitely seek professional help, it could be postpartum depression.

Good luck!

Answer 10

I have to agree with happymommy's answer. My mum suffered from post-partum depression and it got really bad until she got professional help.

If it is too late to be post-partum, it could just be a mild depression from the break up. If it is really beginning to affect your relationship with your daughter, it is time to seek medical help. You do NOT want to subconciously have negative feelings towards your daughter as she grows up.

In the end, only you can make the decision of whether or not you need professional help.