My Girlfriend wont have sex with me. Why?

Question

I am a lesbian, and my girlfriend and I have been in a relationship for a little over a year now. In the beginning, she was hot for me…and the sex was amazing. The best sex I’ve ever had. We don’t have many problems in our relationship with the exception that about 4-5 months into our relationship, sex went out the window.

Initially I completely understood. For one our living situations had changed, and we were both uncomfortable having sex in our houses. But once we moved into our own place together I thought it would get better. I went a good 6 months with maybe sex 3 times. She swears up and down its not cuz she isn’t attracted to me, I’m lucky to get it once every 2 months. I just don’t understand. And I don’t know how to approach her anymore. She wasn’t molested as a child, I know she has trust issues, but why would sex be so hot in the beginning and not now?

Another thing: she will lust over other girls ...or over a movie star on tv. What is it about me that she can’t lust for?

Answer 1

My best suggestion is talk to her. Tell her how you feel. Ask her if anything is wrong. You are a human being with blood flowing through you and it's only natural that you want to be physical. Explain that to her and that you're feeling sexually malnourished. Ask her if there is a solution. Don't be afraid to explain to her that sex is a part of relationship that is important and you fear the relationship will suffer and who knows what will come of it without. There's nothing wrong with that. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 2

Don' t u realize that she outgrown u like an old toy and is now seeking 'fresh meat'? I don't mean to be rude but basically this is how the mind works. It will get tired of anything after a while and will always something new as long as that kind of desire exist. The desire is usually burnt out with age/ time but on different levels 4 different people. Get over it & move on...the sooner the better.

Answer 3

Sounds like a slump in the relationship. It happens, even with strait couples. Try talking to her some more about how you feel, but don't keep pressing the issue (that can be a major turn-off). Ask her how she feels and how much she's interested in sex.
Also, you can try turning up the romance, coffee, raw oysters, chocolate, olives, the list goes on and on. Loot's of food are aphrodisiacs... maybe her libido isn't kicking like it used to because of nutritional reasons (you never know).
Good luck!

Answer 4

It's normal for sex to taper off after the first year or so. But if you don't feel comfortable about it,and have talked to her about it,and nothing's being done,then perhaps you need to move on. I for one,wouldn't stay in a relationship with no sex,unless the person was physically unable to perform in some way.....

Answer 5

From reading what you said... I'd get the impression that she's just not into you anymore, there could be something else to the story that we're missing, or that you're over seeing, but my advice would be to talk to her about her emotions towards you, both sexually and emotionally, if she doesn't there's something she's hiding, and you would be better off finding someone else who can show they are into you and meet you needs as well as wants.

Good luck

Answer 6

Has she been taking any anti-depressants like Paxil or Zoloft? That will kill a sex drive in a hurry.

She lusts over movie stars, etc., because she can't have them. We want what we can't have.

Answer 7

maybe you could try something different. Make it exciting for her like it was in the beggining??

Answer 8

try something different to spice up your sex life.

Answer 9

ummm...,yea sorry about that best of luck to you

Answer 10

...the parties over...