Ok, so me and my bestfriend have been friends for 12 years. Lately (the past two years) I feel like im competing against her! I know shes my best friend and i should be completely comfortable around her but thats just the way it is. She always has to shop at the same stores as me, get the same clothes, the otherday she even got her hair cut the same as mine!! I love her like a sister but at the same time I cant stand her! Shes also tries VERY hard to impress the "popular" girls at my school. Shes trying to be somthing shes not and everyone who really knows her can see right through that. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME SOME ADVICE???! Should I tell her to stop trying, that I hate how she copys my every single move? For crying out loud she even likes the same guy as me! She hit on my boyfriend!!!!!! HELP!
2007-03-08 07:48:24 · 11 answers · asked by Becca 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
In alot of ways, the frustrations you're having with your best friend are similar to that of sisters. Usually when someone 'copies' you - it's the best form of flattery! It means they look up to you and want to emulate you. So you should feel great that she thinks you're that cool. Maybe the next time you are shopping, suggest something more suited for 'her' own unique style. she might just not have the knack for picking out clothes and hairstyles as you do.
2007-03-08 07:53:40 · answer #1 · answered by 1912 Hudson 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This kind of rivalry is typical for close friends. I had a similar experience when I was in high school. Just know that she is doing this because she looks up to you in some way, so compassion is your best bet. Encourage her to demonstrate her own individuality and independence instead of condeming her for copying you. If you go shopping together, encourage her to find clothes that fit HER personality. Encourage her to notice someone else for a crush. Encourage her to know that she doesn't have to impress anyone at all other then herself. She will carry this with her for her entire life. My best friend just told me she still thinks of similar things I told her over 12 years ago.
2007-03-08 07:56:06 · answer #2 · answered by Holiday 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it's obvious that she looks up to you and that (even though it may not seem like it) she wants what you have. In a way you should be flattered.
But tell her that you're a little uncomfortable with how much she mimics you. Tell her that you love her, but she needs to find her own sense of self. Tell her you'll be willing to help her find a man as awesome as yours and that you can find some clothes that flatter her figure more than the ones she has.
Unless she's told you straight-up that she's competing with you, then you need to help her because she's not you.
2007-03-08 07:56:00 · answer #3 · answered by notsoswan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell her straight up ,"please stop doing the exact same things as i do". If she finds it offensive then calmy but seriously tell her you love her like a sister but its annoying, ask her how she would feel if you copied her every move. If shes your best friend she will understand. And another thing, dont ever try to impress popular girls, most people talk bad about them behind their backs anyway. Hope this helps
2007-03-08 08:05:50 · answer #4 · answered by ecko_mr.bubbles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She seems to be stepping into an unhealthy direction. Frankly, continuing the friendship with her as she is going isn't good. I would recommend being real upfront with her. Tell her everything she is doing wrong, hitting on your boyfriend, impressing people with phoniness, etc. If you lose her as a friend, big deal, she isn't worth it. But you may turn her around. She is searching for an identity, push her in the right direction or get off.
2007-03-08 07:54:09 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had "friends" like that , and believe me they are not your friend. I know how annoying that can be. Someone copying everything that you say and do . I confronted these people about that and all they did was laugh and continue to be me. So this is what I did; I told them that they don't have any original ideas , and that they can't buy anything or get anyone without trying to take what is mine . Then I pretended to like people that I really could'nt stand (especially guys) And watched her make a fool of herself . Which proved to me that she was'nt my friend at all . Get Rid Of Her!!!!
2007-03-08 08:11:44 · answer #6 · answered by winnerfull-1 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kissing your bestfriend contained in the lips is truly strange, properly perhaps he only favor to attempt you or see how could you react, i have been through that project so what i visit advice you is to aviod the first kiss coz it may lead on to issues w/c can ruin your friendship.
2016-12-05 10:25:42 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well be thankful people look up at you that happened to me exactly and i couldn't stand it so we got in a huge fight now alot of people hate me they said that she simply looked up at me so as for your problem talk to her but if you feel like yelling stop and count to 5 in your head I'm sure you don't want to loose the relation you have shes going through a face she just doesn't have self confidence for now help her
2007-03-08 07:54:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless you live in some remote farm town in Idaho, there are tons of other people you can have as a best friend.
2007-03-08 07:51:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She isn't worth being your best friend. Go find another best friend. No one hits on another girl's man. NO ONE! =)
2007-03-08 07:51:40 · answer #10 · answered by craz34jason 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋