I am in divorce court and I am feeling aline and depressed. She has moved on with another man and I don't care about that. She hold my son hostage and the new guy claims he is his father and not me. I am in a mood of depression because of my son. I havent seen him since nov 17 and I still have his christmas presents wrapped. How doo I get him to recongize me again as his father and any advice on how to pick myself out of the ground?
2007-03-08 07:44:12 · 11 answers · asked by dirbe22 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well if you are paying child support for this child, he is obviously yours. See a lawyer and tell him exactly what you told us. There will have to be a paternity test to determine if the child is yours.
Lots of people hold their child hostage like this and it is totally selfish. Good luck.
2007-03-08 07:56:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow. Well, first things first. Divorce court will resolve the custody battle. If she continues to keep you away from him and the you have the agreement in writing of shared parenting, if she violates that, she's held in contempt of court which could =jail time. Now, the other thing is, if the other man claims he's his son, I would suggest getting a DNA testing done, ordered by the courts. That way the results are there in writing and on a legal document. If they plan on playing ugly, you play it as well. Once you get your son one on one depending on how old he is, explain some things to him; if he' s a toddler, just do the best you can and "work" with the situation at hand. Keep me posted!! Good luck!!
2007-03-08 15:55:02 · answer #2 · answered by suzlaa1971 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You definitely need the legal edge here. Unless ex has something on you to prove you unfit dad, she has to allow you to visit the child. Your lawyer needs to address the issue and put in your divorce decree that you are allowed every other weekend, holidays, father's day, birthdays, etc. Once that is approved by the judge, she cannot legally deny you visitation. That is when you will have the chance to reestablish the bonds with your child and set the child straight that you are his dad. Wish you the best.
2007-03-08 16:18:07 · answer #3 · answered by Annie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son is blessed to have a father that still wishes to be a part of his life.
I haven't been in your shoes, but if you do a search of "divorced fathers of children" on Yahoo (or any search engine), there appear to be several organizations that might be able to provide you with advice, assistance, etc.
It's not much of an answer, but it may be a start as a resource.
I wish you well.
2007-03-08 15:56:29 · answer #4 · answered by Pythagoras 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am assuming since you say you are in divorce court you have an attorney? If so, have the attorney file a petition so you can see your child. It will cost you attorney fees but it will be worth. Also, there are several groups that help non custodial fathers, providing moral support and guidance. Good luck.
2007-03-08 15:51:35 · answer #5 · answered by Robin 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make a plan for your life. This will be a start to get you going. A plan to get visitation of your son. Are you employed? Do you and your wife have a parenting plan? These are things you need to start working on. I know it's hard to get started, but you have too. Their are different organizations out their to help you with these problems, contact them. Get your environment as stable as you can, so they will have no excuse not to give you visitation. Your son will not forget you as his dad, believe me. You just need to get in their and fight to see him, and remind him when your hugging him!!! Self pity won't get you anywhere!!
2007-03-08 15:55:21 · answer #6 · answered by sue d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you make sure that woman allows you to be a part of the boys life or take custody, make her go by the order of visitation, if there is none get one, also get a DNA test done to make 100% sure that is your kid, pick yourself up now be strong for your son, things will work out if you keep positive,,good luck to you and your son!
2007-03-08 15:53:18 · answer #7 · answered by kat_luvr2003 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its sounds to me that u really love your son, my best advice go to court and arrange a way to see your child. that way she will have no choice but to let you see your child. i don't know how old your son is but tell him why you and your ex-wife broken up, and explain to him why you are his father and not the other guy. your son has a right to know who his real father is. good luck
2007-03-08 15:59:47 · answer #8 · answered by lil' missy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to see someone for the depression. If not you will come-off desperate and out of control
Then get yourself together and make a plan to see your son
Legally of course
2007-03-08 15:53:14 · answer #9 · answered by bubbba2u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
how sad........ :(
i'm not sure about that really..... If he thinks that his father is the other guy and you went to tell him that you are his father, he might get confused about life..... just talk to your former wife and tell her that you really care about your son and you want to be close to him....
2007-03-08 15:52:47 · answer #10 · answered by bloody a 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋