5 months ago I met my current boyfriend and we've been moving slowly and surely down the relationship road, slow being the main word here....He has me very confused. First, we broke up 3 months ago because he was downright rude to me with some insensitive things he said to me. We were apart for a little less than a month and then he called and we went out to dinner and had a heart to heart and made up. He told me that he's really cautious, he doesn't date much nor has he had any really long term relationships (he's 40 and I'm the same)....I understand his intimicy issues, I think I have some of the same ones....Since we've been back on, we've gotten to know each other much better and met each other's friends and families, but the thing is that after a great weekend together, when I think that finally we're getting somewhere and my heart opens a little, he pulls right back inside himself and is distant- not calling, not emailing, for a time. I just don't get it. Can you help?
2007-03-08 03:39:48 · 7 answers · asked by Sara B. 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
he's scared of letting you in so you need to be patient if you want this thing to work, it may take alot of time. It took my man about 3 years to start to really let the shell brake but it's worth it we've been together 10 and I still learn new things about him.
2007-03-08 03:44:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Pay attention to the key words here: he is 40, really curious, doesn't date much, never had long term relationships. Your man is confused as to which team he is playing on. He is also not ready for a girlfriend and likes to play around. You should listen carefully to what he is telling you. I would let this one go and move on to someone more stable and knows what he wants. Thank you and good luck.
2007-03-08 11:50:57 · answer #2 · answered by cookie 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The point of dating is to get to know a person, and decide if they are the right one for you. Could it be possible, that this guy isn't right for you? Why do you want to analyze his weird behavior? If he's made it to the age of 40, with no long-term relationships, there might be something wrong. Instead of trying to figure him out, and mold him into what you want him to be, you need to accept what he is, then decide if what he is is what you want. Life is too short to have to work so hard at a crappy relationship.
2007-03-08 11:50:51 · answer #3 · answered by Tiss 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well if he was downright rude and insensitive this early on, what else is there to talk about? He will do it again and say some nastier things next time-you know it.
Sounds like he lacks respect.
And if he tries acting remember he thinks those thoughts deep inside or never would have said them.
2007-03-08 11:47:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
In a five month relationship you seperated for three months, what relationship.
I think you have found yourself a friend that you can do things with and have heart to heart chars with, now go look for a boyfriend.
2007-03-08 11:49:11 · answer #5 · answered by Lou 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
He needs to figure out what he wants and you need to decide if you are willing to wait for him to figure it out. He knows what he wants he just isn't being true to you or himself. Good Luck
2007-03-08 11:52:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anne D 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
40 - time is running out.
If he enjoys you and you two can connect. It's time to commit.
At 40 you two are no young chickens.
2007-03-08 11:44:53 · answer #7 · answered by dirtmojo 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋