Did he leave me for the other woman...or?

Question

So i am trying to figure out the truth...
my husbands and my marriage was pretty close to perfect! ...perfect meaning, we just got married in septembert and we had a baby girl on the way due in Feb.! then all the sudden last november a coworker starting flirting and talking to my husband, they ended up sending dirty text messages to each other. i was 7 months pregnant when i found out and confrunted him about it. he lied to me and said SHE just had a crush. I knowing better from past relationships then confrunted her about it and she told me everything.
a week later he moved out stating he loves me but hes not in love with me. i then found emails from him to her stating that he loves her. does is sound like he threw away his family to be with her or that he really didn't love me any more and wanted out?
PLEASE BE NICE!

i know i asked this already but i want some more opinions!

Answer 1

he threw u away to be with her, and he didn't love u either. sometimes when there is someone else in the relationship she has more control than we imagine. he could in time change his mind once the honeymoon stage with her is over with. he may than see u differently but for now she has him bewitched. this is lust, and nothing but. not real love. doesn't last long but while its going on he won't come home. but this may be a pattern of behavior with him. when u found out for sure, he knew it would take so much explaining to get u to listen to him, he simply didn't want to put the effort into it. his character speaks for itself. believe me u are better off, only u don't see it that way now. he is a coward, and perhaps when all the responsibilities of marriage, and a new baby hit him, he decided he would rather go to a place where he did not have to be responsible, he wanted to be in a place, where there were no demands on him, she is now showing him all the good side of her, but after awhile the honeymoon will be over with and he will want to come home to u, but unfortunately it is going to happen again, as this seems to be just who he is. so sorry for your heartache, we really never know anyone until we live with them, and during a problem time i do believe their true self emerges.

Answer 2

This may not sound nice but he is selfish. It is pretty normal these days that when something gets tiresome, difficult, or just plain old people tend to wander on to the next exciting thing. Also, this whole idea that "I love you but I am not in love with you" is crazy. Love is action. Lust is a feeling.

If this situation goes the way so many others do then he will grow tired of this other woman also.

I think the best thing for you to do is to ask him "Help me understand why you want to be with someone else" Be prepared for any answer. Explain to him that you want to work together and make your family and marriage work.

Remember that you cannot change him. You can only change yourself and how you react to the things others do.

At some point you may just need to concentrate on your child and move on from him.

I really hope that I helped. God Bless.

Answer 3

Did you know each other very well when you got married? Or was it a whirlwind courtship on the way to the altar? Was your husband ready for a child so soon after the wedding? Had you talked about having a family right away? Or did he marry you because you were pregnant and he thought it was the right thing to do?

Bottom line is that he left you ahd your new baby. He's a cheater and he abandoned his family. You are better off without him.

Answer 4

Honestly and nicely as possible. I will have to say yes... Actually if you read what you wrote, than the answer will be clear to you as well. It sounds just like that, he threw his family away for her, but girl, trust me. I am a single mother raising my daughter and things do get better. It's better that he show his true colors before the baby comes along rather than keeping you in constant grief and trying to raise a child as well. You will be okay and things will be rough, but they do get better. Good luck with all....

Answer 5

Sounds like he wasn't prepared for a comittment, and you may be better off without him. Anyman who is married that short of time, with a baby on the way, who starts messing around, was not in the right mind set for marriage to begin with.

I'm so sorry and I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 6

He is immature and is doing this because he doesn't want to face up the fact that he is a daddy and all of the responsibilities that come with it. You need to get a divorce and raise your daughter, she comes first now. Hopefully, someday he will realize what an *** he has been and step up to the plate as a father. Don't take him back, to me this is unforgivable to leave a pregnant wife for another woman. You and your daughter deserve much better.

Answer 7

I'd say both, most likely. He probably thought he loved you then saw what else he could have (which will prolly just turn out to be a fling that will leave both unhappy). I give you my genuine sympathy. That's truly awful. I wish you all the best in your romantic relationships from here on. You'll find someone worth your time and energy that will love you and your baby : )

Answer 8

You have a very sad situation, let him go, take care of your kid, but make him pay child support. Maybe what has happened has happened for the better, move on on and be happy. (confrunted? check spelling)

Answer 9

It seems he only loves himself and needs to grow up. Yes he is a man on the outside but on the inside he is still a little boy. If this tramp thinks he will be faithful to her she will be the one crying when he walks out on her also. They deserve each other. It takes two to tango and they both are at fault. Be happy you found out now, honey from experience I know it hurts like hell but you are the better person and don't deserve a low life cheating pig like him. Sue his butt for divorce, alimony and child support and start rebuilding your life. You don't need a loser and his tramp bringing you down.

Answer 10

Well it sounds to me that you husband didn't know what he wanted.I'm sure if you hadn't confronted her he would've still been having his cake and eating it too.It's hard to say whether it was her he chose or that he wanted out of the marriage period. Is he still with her? There's your answer!Don't fret too much everything happens for a reason and you deserve better.