when my friend came to the door the other day, i noticed she was bigger which i have NO problem with at all but for some reason i had us go around a different way of the house because i didn't know what my step dad would think. I feel so guilty and selfish to be her friend. I mean i would go to the mall and stuff with her. I have with someone else who was bigger. I did the same thing once to a other friend when i was like 13 and i can't believe i did it the other night. It can't be because i am embarrassed because i brought her outside when my grandfather was here and he said hi and everything. Man, i don't know what to do! but i hate this guilt feeling! I know my step dad wouldn't have said anything ..but you wonder what people would think. She is coming over tomorrow and i keep obsessing over "what if she knew" and that i feel like a bad friend.
Don't think i am shallow. I wouldn't mind going in public with her ...i don't have a problem ..i think she is pretty. It was just that day.
2007-03-08 02:37:06 · 12 answers · asked by Heather B 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
umm no i do NOT have a problem with it ..i think i should know. I feel guilty DUH that is why i am asking this. wow people love to think people are such bad people. Well, not everyone is!
2007-03-08 02:40:59 · update #1
oh by the way you can't say i am all this rude stuff because i took her outside when my grandfather was here.
2007-03-08 02:53:39 · update #2
I guess I don't understand what the whole problem is. Either your her friend unconditional or your not. So what if shes BIG does that change who she is. Sounds like you should not worry about what other people are thinking. That's their problem..YOU should just be a friend.
2007-03-08 02:42:03 · answer #1 · answered by txO3blueeyes 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good Grief, I just read for 5 minutes.......
About you not wanting to take your friend in your house to see your dad, because she's fat.
That's mean. You may not be fat, but I'm real sure she could find something wrong with you, physically. Maybe a big nose, jacked up teeth, crossed eyes.....
You should be considering yourself lucky to have any friends at all, If they knew what you were really like, maybe they wouldn't want to come over anyway...
Grow Up
2007-03-08 10:44:13 · answer #2 · answered by lady luck 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't believe you began by saying you had no problem with her size when you obvious do. I am not uncomfortable with 'large' people but would never be attracted to one as a mate, (just my preference). I don't think it is something that should determine friendship. Is this something your family is very vocal about??? If so I can to some degree understand what happened but if it is just you then you have a problem you must deal with.
2007-03-08 10:45:44 · answer #3 · answered by dano 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
would you want her to be embarrassed by you because you are smaller? you don't want her to meet your family because she is bigger then you? do they critize people for their weight? is that why you feel so bad that she is bigger then you? yes that is shallow. i think she would think you a bad friend if she knew. if that is not the reason then maybe you are feeling bad because you want to help her and make her healthy. dear you need to let her be her and accept her for her. maybe you 2 can go exercise together and get healthy together.
2007-03-08 11:01:55 · answer #4 · answered by kim 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend that is over weight. Sometimes it's hard. But, let it go. Tell her...she might already know. If she is ok with the way she is, you should be too. If you can't be ok with it, your friendship can't survive. If she talks to you about losing weight, let her know that you will be there to support her all the way.
2007-03-08 10:42:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
DUDE, Don't think about what your family says about your taste in women. go for what you want. I wanted to leave my G/f and my family was there oh we like her stay with her. so i gave her the chance. she quit her pill now we have a kid i am stuck with some one who i don't like. if you wanna be with her do it its you that may eventually live with her and you will have too be with her your family may visit once a week and see her but its your happiness that matters. life is short to live miserable. do what makes you happy. its normal to seek acceptance. every person or animal wants to feel accepted your family will always be there for ya. so talk to them. if it really bothers you. but remember follow your gut
2007-03-08 10:51:10 · answer #6 · answered by rossrobichaux 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The best thing you can do, is treat her the same as everybody else. Just being her friend and not judging, may be the boost she needs !
2007-03-08 10:41:34 · answer #7 · answered by Scorpius59 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe im wrong, but arent you afraid of it i mean arent you afraid of becoming fat and what other people would think if that happened to you. So that embarrassment you move it 2 what other would think about your friend..
2007-03-08 10:48:25 · answer #8 · answered by alex 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe im rude but i'd say screw what your family thinks about her.. and if you have to question that or feel shame for her.. you should be friends... that is way shallow of you.. im that way though too sometimes.. its partially overthinking on your part
2007-03-08 10:40:47 · answer #9 · answered by ames 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
you do have a problem with it, or you wouldn't be so conflicted over it. And that's just mean.
2007-03-08 10:40:03 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋