Father needs help.....?

Question

I have a 10 year old son, that called me up last night crying wanting me to come get him. He said that his mother smacked him in the face, grabbed him by the throat, and threw him up against the wall. I called the sherifs office, they went out, and asked him in front of his mom if this happened. He would not say it did. I then called human services, and they told me they could not do anything because the sheriff said all was ok.....What should I do?

Answer 1

You should NOT called the cops! Obvuiusly your son was reaching out t you when being disciplined. perhaps he exagereated a little and did not saw the consequences of such accusations. If there is no evidence of abuse or neglect, then don;t look any further into this.

However, try to spend more time with yoru son, he is a pre-teen now and hormones go high, just as much as bad behavior, talking back, and sneaking out of the house; which is typical of a pre-teen.
Talk to your ex and see how you can handle the situation together.

Good luck

Answer 2

CPS won't do crap. I knew a CPS worker who hated her job because there is so much red tape that their hands are tied until the child ends up dead. If this comes as a complete surprise and you don't know your ex to be a violent person in any way, then your son could have just been exaggerating or reaching out -but keep an eye out for signs. If she grabbed him by the throat or threw him against the wall, bruises will appear within a few days. As soon as they do, document and take him to a doctor to document. Being a father, it is so hard to get a child from the mother, no matter how dead beat they are. Whoever made the law that children need their mother more than anything obviously hasnt met some of the mothers in this world. If you know she is violent, try going back to court for more visitation, your son is at an age now where the court will take his opinion into consideration. And if you know he is afraid to say anything in front of his mom, let the judge know and he will talk to your son in closed chambers. Good luck! I am not a man but I do have a stepdaughter so I know how hard it can be when you are not the mother.

Answer 3

First of all, I think you should have confronted father with this situation. Children of separated parents don't understand the fact that they can not live with both mama and daddy. They don't realize this and don't want to accept this period. They will use tactics like this as a ploy. They are smarter than you think! But then again it could be fact as well. You must first be able to trust the fathers judgement and honesty in this matter, especially if he has custody. I would look for myself for bruises or confirm abuse before I called any authority. As a mother you do have this right unless they have been revoked. And if they have, you need to back off, calling the authorities will just prolong the bad issues and make it look like this is a get even tactic you don't want to be in for yourself or even for the childs benefit either. If the authorities have investigated it and come up with an answer here already, there may be a need to question the childs statement. Over protection here could be negative to the child and cause even more problems later on. I believe I would back up a little but talk with the person in authority which made the visit. Find out the facts first before you react. Compromise, intelligent conclusions need to be made here. Life has to go on until it stops and there is no need for abuse to the child. And there is no need to let the child abuse you either. Good Luck. Use your head here for the childs sake! Da. Kid!

Answer 4

Sir it must be devastating knowing that your son needed you and his mother is a bit mean to him. You did the right thing by calling the police and the social service, I would do the same as well if that's my kid being hurt by my ex, but unfortunately, I do have question regarding the event last night. Did you went and see your son face to face??.if you did, does he have bruise on his neck from his mom hand?, how about inside his body, if a child is been thrown away to the wall,there will be spot or bruising.
Go to your son and talk to him privately, then ask him all the things that he told you. Ask yourself, why did your son called you and tell you this issue, could it be that he wants your attention and for him to get it,he needs to make this "little white lies" Kids from broken home or have parents divorce, they become confuse and it make them feel like its their fault because mom and dad is not together anymore. This happens to a lot of kids when they're parents end up divorcing. Right now,just be there for him, assure him that you love and care for him and even though that he doesn't live with both of you,it doesn't mean that you will forget him. Give as much love as you can,he does need you now,esp. on that age.................good luck!!

Answer 5

Check for bruising , take pictures if there are and call a damn good attorney. The sherriff that visited is a f-ing idiot to ask in front of the mother. He is obviously scared of her or he wouldn't have called you. And the recording is a really good idea. If you can get him off alone take him to the police/sherriff's office and let him make a report. There is a statute of limitations to file a report on an incident, it varies from state to state , but in my area a child has ALOT of time to report a crime. Good luck and try to stay strong . Remember if you retaliate against the mother you will make it harder on yourself. That child needs you to keep a level head.

Answer 6

well it sounds like your son wants to live with you. but it also could be that if you and his mom get along he wants you all to fight. if all that did happen the sheriff of all people would of seen marks on the boy. i know you want to believe your son and all. but there would have been marks. he is doing this for attention. his mom could of made him mad or he wants to spend more time with you. so if he acts up maybe his mom will give him to you. there could be a number of this why he's saying this. is your ex involved with someone new and the kid don't like him or he done something to him that even your ex don't know. ask your ex if you could take him a few days and talk to him. tell him he needs to tell you the truth and find out what is bothering him. you may find out it something really simple or could be a major problem but you don't know until you find out. he seems like he could be open to you. but don't push him away and you don't need to tell his mom really anything unless there is major concerns. and keep your promises if you make them. hope this helps

Answer 7

Get a restraining order and have the sheriffs talk to son without mother present.
Then contact D.A. department and have them pull the phone time luds.
This will give the D.A.Department a clear site of events.
After that it's up to you to get custody of son.
Good Luck

Answer 8

If you know she has showed signs of abuse before keep calling the police until they respond. Also call his school and talk with the counselor to see if they could talk with him. If he opens up to them they have to do something. I have a 10yr old son and if I thought he was being abused by his father I think they would have to hold be back from kicking his a**. Good luck

Answer 9

If he's being honest, do your best to get him out of there. Keep a notebook with dates and times of him calling you to tell you about things like this. Also, when you see him, if he tells you these things, write them down. Make sure you put the date. Only write what he tells you. If it happens again, make sure you use this to get him out of there. I'm suprised they asked him in front of his mom. I wish I could be more help. I wish you and your son the best of luck.

Answer 10

Call CPS (that's Child Protective Services). They have to come out no matter what. Ask for a "Wellfare Visit". Then, get a great lawyer, get your son, and have his mother put in prison for "Assault to a Minor".

Good Luck.

You're going to have to "Pitch a Bi*ch" to get anything done on this matter. Get a lawyer fast, and press charges against her!!!!!