How do I face the reality?!?

Question

i want the best of everything ...when i cant get something i want, i just day dream about it..i dont want to accept i cant have something cuz then it will make me feel so suicidal...like i always want to be the most beautiful in the class, the most inteligent, the strongest....when i think im not the best, i just wait for the day i will be!!...iv never had a bf cuz i feel no one of them is good enough for me!...i really need to change cuz im tired of myself..i know happiness is not about having the best or being the best ..i just want to feel better..to be strong enough to see the things the way they REALLY are. i dont want to live in the dreams!..help me?!

Answer 1

It's good you make admissions that indicate your needing some adjustments, I think your on your way to feeling better;

I think your priorities are twisted; you think too much about You, it's all about You, and you see this, so it's a good thing.

I will suggest you act, and not sit back and mentally try to change yourself; I thinki you need exposure to the real world and what is going on out there; so, here is a plan, you can try it, even if it's hard, or trash this in it's entirety, it's up to you.

Volunteer your services to a shelter and see what the hungry look like, help out.

Join the Forestry department this upcoming summer and feel how work really feels.

Get a job and work and experience that the "best clothing" aactually takes Real Work to get, don't rely on mom or dad to buy your stuff; you'll feel beter knowing you don't need this crap....to be you.

Start a sport, a sport that causes pain, Volleyball, basketball (who cares how "good" you are) pain brings humility and humbleness to the sport; as sport is above the individule; it's about what you can bring to yourself and sport, not "how great you are at it".

By subjecting yourself to hardships your priorities are going to change for the better.

I sense your a good kid, one who wants self- change, your life lessons have taught you that by acting the brat got you what you wanted, maybe, maybe not, learn about you and learn a new set of values; values like humbleness as that will take you a long-long way in life; learn to appreciate others more (nobody is good enough for you) by empathy, try seeing things their way and walk in there shoes; your values need changing and flat out experience will do it faster than thinking about it.

Answer 2

hi dear,
it seems that both of have exactly the same problem............
and i know just how hard it is, i'm also a big day dreamer and it takes toll on reality, first of all stop being suicidal cause life is 2 short nyways and 2 precious 2 lose for petty things.
the first thing u need 2 do is set achievable goals,like"always" lookin the prettiest is not possible even for aishwarya rai,there r times when other actress outstrip her,right ?
and about being the most intelligent, now ppl who get 110 on 100 also sometimes lack common sense so u would'nt call them brainy, would u?
so set goals which r humanly possible 2 achieve , ya it's hard because it feels like v 're makin a compromise,that's how i felt the first time i had set a realistic target.
the second thing is :
dream a better dream and work to make it real
and the last and most important one :
life is unpredictable ,v don't have time 2 sit and wait for the best, v may not be alive tomorrow!
so v must choose the best of what v have TODAY,RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW!
get urself a bf and chill out
good luck!!!!!!

Answer 3

I know its hard accepting the things you can't have in life. Human nature - the more we can't have it, the more we want it. You need to feel good about yourself. Do stuff that makes you happy. Maybe go shopping this weekend & catch a movie with a couple of friends.

Don't expect perfection from everything you do. No one's perfect. Everyone of us has flaws. Even the popular girl at school, the smartest & the prettiest. Whenever you experience failure, remind yourself ''your not perfect'' you can only do things to the best of your ability & thats it. I'll give you an example. You could be terrible when it comes to math but brilliant when it comes to science. While someone else in your class would be terrible at the subject your best at.

The thing is, we're all special in our own ways. We each have talents different from the rest. I'm sure your great in your own way. You've gotta love yourself before loving anyone else. Accept yourself for who you are. I bet your a lovely person. All you really need is a boost of confidence.

Tip - Guys like confidence in a girl :)

If you've got problems related to anything that might have caused you to act like this, do see someone who might be able to help. In order for anyone to help you, You've got to take the first step; Which I believe you did, Cause you came on here & talked to us about your problem. Not many people are that brave to confront the issue.

Take care dear :)

Answer 4

I strongly suggest that you see a physiological therapist and deal with the inner issues that are buried inside of you and as soon as you can . It sounds that you may be depressed and you need help . Don't feel that that seeing someone is bad , it isn't , we all need help . Trying to be the best at everything will eventually drive crazy and its OK to be defeated and you have to accept this with a smile . There is always someone better than us and there is always someone worse then us . You have to be you and not try to be someone else . The facts of of life are real and you must deal with it on a daily basis as well accepting reality , winning and loosing . You can't be the best at everything its impossible . To me it sounds that you are very insecure within you and you are trying to be the best . Please get help and don't be ashamed . God bless you .

Answer 5

I think you have to compomise in certain areas of life by thinking of the things you already have and have achieved. No one can be the best at everything. I'm glad you are starting to realise.

Having said this you should pick a few areas of your life and strive to be the best as in small doses it is an admirable quality. Try a sport and business.

Everything else chill out a bit.

Answer 6

You need to be bought back down to earth........and fast.

"Ive never had a bf cuz I feel none of them is good enough for me" - Do you have any idea how arrogant that statement is.

It sounds to me like you are suffering from delusions of granduer and you definitely DO need a reality check.

Stop looking down to people and start realising that you are nothing really.........nothin but p%ss, flesh, bones and blood and you will eventually be a skeleton in a coffin rotting away just like everybody else.

Lose the ego, stop taking yourself so seriously and start enjoying your life in the moment.

Look outside of yourself, start having concern for other people and stop looking inside yourself all the time.

Go to Africa and held out the poor children build a school or something, that should give you a reality check and get you out of your own delusional little world.

Sorry to be so harsh, but you wanted something to snap out of your dreams and I hope these words can guide you out of "yourself" and into "the world".

Answer 7

You dont want to be the best but you want the best of everything hence you want to be no.1. You got to remember that Dreams are dreams and reality is reality. My method is getting really stoned to the point of bliss, Then watch a documentry about some sick serial child molester/killer/ex - army trained etc etc etc.... and thats the slap round the face I need to see reality.

Answer 8

Take a trip to a children's hospice or hospital. Take look at those kid's situation. One thing they have in common beside their illness it that they are happy to be kids. Smiling little faces. You'll then be thankful for what you have.

You need a wake up call, and a reality check. While you are there sign up as a volunteer.

Answer 9

you gotta learn to run your own race if your always competing against over people those people will always b better than you you will never get ahead i used to have a mate that always tried to be better than me and buy the same clothes as me and work out more than me try getting more girls than me now im sick of it and so is everyone else it jus bugs people .Learn to do things for your own reasons not to look better than someone else theres nothing wrong with trying to make yourself feel good but perfection can only be measured by YOUR OWN in-perfection

Answer 10

First of all, just thank God for all the blessings you have.
Especially thank him for the things we take for granted,like
the warm Sunshine and the beauty of the Earth.
Forget so much the material world and focus on natural things.
Beauty is within, think positive and always pray.