You are PROUDLY SOUTH AFRICAN when:...?

Question

You produce a R100 note instead of your driver's licence when
stopped by a traffic officer
Ø You continue to wait after a traffic light has turned to green to make way for taxis travelling in the opposite direction
Ø You can do your monthly shopping on the pavement
Ø You can pay your tuition fees by holding up a sign at a traffic light
Ø You paint your car's registration on the roof
Ø You have to take your own linen with you if you are admitted to a government hospital.
Ø Prisoners go on strike
Ø When 2 Afrikaans TV programmes are separated by a Xhosa announcement of the following Afrikaans program, and a Pedi ad
ØThe SABC advertises and shows highlights of the program you just finished watching
Ø You get cold easily. Anything below 16 degrees Celsius is Arctic weather.
Ø You go to "braais" regularly, where you eat boerewors and swim, sometimes simultaneousl
Ø You can sing your national anthem in four languages, and you have no idea what it means in any...lol. 4 kicks

Answer 1

Thanks for the laugh, some of those were pretty good!

On a similar note, here's some more of them:
You Know You're From Johannesburg When...

The person in front of you in traffic this morning was hijacked and you got irritated because you missed the traffic light.

While eating dinner a news item comes on TV about a family of six slaughtered in their home, and you ask someone to pass you the salt.

You never think of taxis in terms of 'public transport'.

You have a minimum of five worst taxi stories.

While waiting at the ATM the bank is robbed by armed gunmen, but you'll be damned if you're going to lose your place in the queue.

You're suspicious of strangers who are actually nice to you.

The last time you drove your car without swearing at someone was when you took your driving test.

It takes you an hour and a half to drive 5km to work in the morning and you think "wow, good traffic day."

Every time you find your car parked where you left it you are genuinely surprised.

You've never been to Melville or Rockey St but love Sandton City.

You can get into a four-hour argument about the quickest way out of Sunninghill after work on a Friday, but can't find Boksburg on a map.

Prostitutes and the homeless are invisible.

You've seriously considered shooting someone.

You have more barbed wire around your home than Diepkloof Prison.

You consider eye contact an act of overt aggression.

You consider a postage-stamp sized patch of grass a garden.

You consider Midrand the 'countryside'.

You happily pay R3500.00 a month for a townhouse in the north the size of a cupboard, but think R2.50 for a loaf of bread is a disgrace.

The last time you visited the coast you paid more in accumulated speeding fines than you did for the entire holiday.

Your monthly car insurance is more than most of the people in SA's car repayments.

What are stars?

You own hiking boots and a 4x4, neither of which have ever touched dirt.

You actually take fashion seriously.

Being truly alone makes you 'go for your gun'.

You have 20 different menus next to your phone.

SA south of the Vaal is still theoretical to you.

You can carry R350 worth of groceries in one plastic bag.

You don't hear gunfire anymore.

You get a call at 4am in the morning from your buddy asking you for directions to @115... and you explain it to him not with streets, but with "landmarks"

While going under the Caltex Star Stop Bridge on the N1 towards Joburg, you catch the first glimpse of the outline of the city, and you think - aaaah, home.

You're sitting in your car, gunshots go off in the middle of the street and everyone just casually looks around and continues their daily routine.

You greet the windscreen-washing man at the robot of Glenhove and the onramp to the M1 north by his name.

Even the police pause momentarily at a red light before driving on late at night, so as to avoid being victim of hijacking.

Oh and to Tsepo, what's the point of posting racist comments to a question that was meant to be fun. Even if you posted it in jest, it clearly shows the type of attitude you have.

Answer 2

Haha! Here, I've got some more for you :-)

1.You have to hire a security guard whenever you park your car.
2.You can count the national soccer team’s scores with no fingers.
3.To get free electricity you have to pay a connection fee of R750.
4.Hijacking cars is a profession.
5.The petrol in your tank may be worth more than your car.
6.More people vote in local reality TV show than in a local election.
7.People have the most wonderful names: Christmas, Goodwill, Pretty, Wednesday, Blessing, Brilliant, Gift, Given, Innocence, Sunny and Nogate
8.Now-now can mean anything from a minute to a month
9.Traveling at 140km/h, you’re the slowest vehicle on the highway.
10.You’re genuinely and pleasantly surprised whenever you find your car parked where you left it.
11.The last time you visited the coast, you paid more in speeding fines and toll fees than you did for the entire holiday.
12.Half your mail is guaranteed to reach its destination.
13.The police advise you not to stop if they wave you down in the middle of the night, but rather to speed past them and drive to your nearest police station.
14.A minibus taxi overtakes you and stops right in front of you.
15.You don’t stop at a red traffic light, in case somebody hijacks your car.
16.Zimbabwean illegal immigrants start leaving the country because the crime rate is too high.
17.The employees DANCE in front of the building to show you how unhappy they are.
18.You can sing your national anthem in four languages, and you have no idea what it means in any of them.
19.You know someone who knows someone who has met Nelson Mandela.
20.You have a gearlock, imobiliser, steering lock and alarm for your car.
21.You know that there’s nothing to do in the Free State.
22.People get caught for reporting a car that got stolen from them that they originally stole.
23. People actually steal electricity cables.
24.Every house has emergency torches in case the electricity cuts out.
22. You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from South Africa!

Hehe, take care! :-)

Answer 3

Okay all of you, including Brad, that was great and I am proud to be South African when I can read this lot and smile - although Brad is right it doesn't really sound too good to anyone outside of SA now does it.

But really, living in London when I walk in Trafalgar Square and I look up to see the South African Flag flying! Man does that look good.

When I am traveling on the underground and I hear afrikaans spoken at the top of their voices because they think no one can understand them - that fun. Not even talking sense I must add.

When I am at work and people tell me they like to employ South Africans, they don't shirk responsibilities.

Its a great country guys, we should be proud to be South African, just need to change the politics !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And a few mind sets !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

When you're wealthy coz you have a job...any job.

When any public lawn is a potential touchies field.

When you have friends who have friends from other races.

When (if you are an expat) you start every 3rd sentence with "in South Africa..."

When you are "not a racist, but..."

When the car you are driving now has been stolen three times...from you.

When "a cultural ceremony" refers to Saturday's braai and "a holy war" to the rugby game thereafter.

Answer 5

When you're the Fresh Prince of your city.

Answer 6

LOL! This Yahoo! Answers post made my day.

Answer 7

True so true, well thats the joys of living in SA!

Answer 8

Heck yes. All of what you said is part of what makes us unique! hehe=)

Answer 9

looking for work and you are told "go and ask Mandela to give you work jou k*ff*r.

South Africans, the only nation that can laugh at ourselves!

Answer 10

Any outsider reading this would think you live in a nuthouse. What exactly are you people proud of?