Why do women have more trouble than men admitting their gender-specific faults?

Question

Men are more forthright when women say disparaging things about men in general. When women say all men are pigs, men are more likely to respond with something like: 'Yea, I'm kind of a pig' or 'Yea, I sure know a lot of pigs out there'. Most women nag their men more than is fair and/or effective, but my pointing this tendency out is sure to make some eyes bug out. What do I mean by "nag"? Well, the man and the woman are cruising along, and everything seems fine, she's with a better than average man,.....and she says: "You know, you haven't _________ (done/fixed/showed concern for) lately." Now, let's turn the tables. Let's say a woman in my position asked a question in a men's studies section like: "Why do men never clean towels, bedsheets or showers, do they think they clean themselves?" She would likely be greeted with answers like, "Yea, we don't get it. Truth is, we don't care about those things being clean" rather than "Not all men..., blah, blah,...you've got problems babe...

........she'd be more likely to have at least some answers that were forthright and honest, and therefore..........USEFUL. Why do most women not want to work towards less complexity, more predictability, and less secrecy about their genders' shortcomings?

I have read the Mars/Venus book, and it seems to have an unintended message that men are cavemen and women are crazy nags.

Answer 1

I think you're being too one-track about this - focusing on certain particular issues instead of all of them.

There are plenty of things that men don't like to admit that I guess you could classify as gender-specific faults. Being lost comes to mind. Stubbornness is a fault many don't like to admit and a reason for not liking to admit them as well. Most men who do drink too much won't admit that. I'm not going to sit here and go on and on.

I can't tell by your picture or username if you are a guy or a girl, but my bet is a guy. Here's why: men don't like to admit their faults to women, and women don't like to admit their faults to men. If they're admitting it to a mixed group, it can go either way. As a woman, I think my girlfriends admit their faults willingly and often even excessively. AND I don't feel like guys do it enough. I bet that men feel the opposite, men do it enough/too much, and women don't.

Women are often pointing out their faults/flaws to each other... I don't exercise as much as I should, I talk too much sometimes, I really shouldn't spend as much as I do on shoes, blah blah, but they're not going to say that kind of stuff to the men in their life - they want to look good to the men, just like the men want to look good to the women, so they don't say... I wear my underwear inside out when I run out of clean ones or I just used a towel from off the floor instead of a clean one.

It's all subjective... and no, my eyes aren't bugging out of my head. :P

Answer 2

How about you be honest? You don't care whether or not your towels are clean????? Really?? Are you saying that you could go an entire year using the same unwashed towel???

So this is a good lesson women. Next time your man refuses to do the laundry because he "doesn't care about that kind of stuff" then just worry about your own laundry and leave his stuff to fester. Watch how fast he'll learn to do laundry.

Furthermore, if you ever hear a response like that from your man, then I'd seriously consider a divorce as his severe sanitary issues could be hazardous to your health. Just a heads up.

Answer 3

I would have to disagree with the statement that "women have more trouble than men admitting their gender-specific faults". I think that insecure women do. I think that women with their feet on the ground can laugh at themselves right along with any guy.
I almost laughed my butt off when a skinny sales clerk approached me at the store and I asked her to show me to the "Super Fat A$$ department". She laughed after the initial shock passed and was a big help to me that day. I had a guy apologize for grumpy behavior and I responded to him "Yeah, I suffer from PMS, too". It was a fun way to tell him that we're okay without getting too deep. I think that guys enjoy us a lot more when we can relax and admit that we have flaws without being whiney or "catty" (a gender specific slur) about it.
Guys probably have an easier time with this because it's pretty basic and not terribly deep. I've found that guys can be pretty "deep" inside, but are more comfortable with simple, basic behavior and communication.

Answer 4

Men have historically had the dominant social position. So talking about men's faults is not very threatening. (Like when people make fun of American culture when it's currently the only major world superpower.) But when you talk about the faults of historically oppressed people (women, ethnic minorities, whoever), expect some defensiveness, because it still stings.

Answer 5

Oh, if only there were an answer. I don't know if this world will ever know all the differences between men and women or why individuals do the things they do.

I do suggest reading "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" -- it might clear a few things up.

Answer 6

Women have trouble admitting gender-specific faults because women are the specific gender taught to be like this. Women are taught, as little girls, to be perfect in every aspect of life, not to take anything less than the best. We are never to admit our age, our natural hair color, our weight or dress size. Don't forget - there is only one other gender, which is man and he seems, in most cases, to be okay with his faults, often using them to his advantage. His gender-specific faults are not faults to him. He has adapted himself to women having to be perfect, so his faults only seem as a problem to the other gender - *female*

Answer 7

Lets js say they're a whiole different species on their own
But now and then i do enjoy an argument...its fun!

Answer 8

i'm sorry, i don't see this in all women. maybe SOME women, but some men are not very forthcoming about their 'gender specific faults' as well. some people just do not fit into their respective gender stereotype roles. maybe more women do not fit than men, so perhaps that is why they don't accept their 'gender specific faults'

Answer 9

Why have children more troubel admitting that they are weaker and less intelligent than grown men ?

Answer 10

I don't think this is true. My experience is that women are generally as self-critical as men if not more so. Criticism of men seems to get a stronger response than criticism of women.