How can I turn my teenager over to the state?

Question

Our son has been a contiuous problem for many years now.
We have had multiple therapists, counselors,private schools,residential centers,police intervention etc.
The problems continue.

He is destroying things in our house, punch holes in the walls, broke our door nearly in half etc etc. Completely disrespectful, steals our money, stole our digital camera etc etc.

On mot recent incident he split our bedroom door nearly in half. He is 17. We had the police come for this incident. And while they said we could not press charges they because they see it as a "dispute" they did say that we could turn him over to the state. But I have heard conflicting statements about doing that. Is it as simple as filling out the paperwork? We are tired,our house is in chaos, our younger daughter is not getting the attention she needs because so much energy needs. As I said, we have been to therapists and counselors.

How can we turn him over to the state. We live in California.

Answer 1

That happens because you didnt hit him the first time...

What you need to do, is subscribe him to a Kung-Fu club. Thats going to get the energy he needs out of him... My brother was like that, he had too much energy and needed to spend it somewhere else, send him in the army or cadets or something, you dont need to turn him in to the state because you are going to regret that later. My mom turned in my sister because she was schizophreniac, but she cried every night and day thinking of my sister.

Just let him spend his energy or have someone really tough explain him that if he doesnt behave, this guy will let him behave, like the Maury Povich show. If he doesnt respect his parents, then you will teach him how to respect, you grab a belt, or a wooden spoon, even a plate, like my mom did...Just dont kill him.

Answer 2

My best friend and her husband adopted a foster child when she was 14 month old. Her parents were terrible so she had a world reknown child specialist evaluate her before adopting her. He said she was fine and if they needed help w/her later he would see her. Long story short at 12 she lost her mind. Literally! She became schitzophrenic and was diagnosed by two Drs. The voices kept telling her to kill the family and she tried several times. She kept trying to burn down the house and took the smoke alarms down to go it. The Dr who had promised to help said he didn't have time to see her but we later found out he won't see schitzo patients because they are not fixable. She was very young to be as advanced as she was and he knew it was always going to be tough to deal with her. They got her admitted to a hospital for an evaluation and refused to take her back into their home. The state tried to force them to so they got a lawyer to have a severance done and it ended up costing them $5000 to get it done. As I so often say, no good deed goes unpunished. She is now in foster care and in a home right next door to my friend. I'm sure the social workers who were so angry that they wouldn't take her back did this on purpose. They live in the country but they can see the house from theirs. She is now 15 and there have been some things happen they feel she is responsible for like cutting the tails off of the horses. She knows which were too wild to do it to and those were the ones that still had tails. Very bizarre! They now have their place for sale and are buying a house in another area completely. I'm telling you this because you need to know that this is not an easy thing to do but I hope you are successful. There are kids that are too messed up to deal with and I imagine your son is one if you are ready to give up. I hope you get him out w/o someone getting hurt. You probably need an attorney and they will make you pay child support to the state. You might offer him the chance to be emancipated. I understand that is pretty easy if the parents are agreeable. I'm sorry you have all this to deal with and you will be in my prayers. Good Luck and God Bless

Answer 3

The state will still make you pay. When does he turn 18? Time for some "tough love".I'd have his....stuff piled outside the door with a note that would say "let us know when you decide to be decent human being. Otherwise don't let the door hit you in the a

Answer 4

kick his a ss out of your house. If u are tough enough to let the state take him let him really find out how tough it is out in the real world, when he realizes that mommy and daddy arent there to pay for his s hi t, he will regret everything hes done to you guys. If that doesnt work hire a tough looking 17 year old to kick his a ss then when he comes home all bloody laugh at him and kick him out but first burn all his belongings and tell him that he was the biggest mistake of your life and that no one loves him. that would pay back for all the s hit he put you through.( by the way im j/k i dont know what to do)

Answer 5

im not sure how to do that what i would do is call your local probation office i would also contact the school as to why they haven't assisted you with file a person in need of supervision petition. That is what we call it here in NY truthfully at 17 in NY i would just make him leave the house if he is that disruptive to your family you could also try calling children and family services and see if they can help you! GOOD LUCK!

Answer 6

You could talk to a health and human services officer or a social worker. The local court house would be able to help you, surely there's somebody there who would be able to tell you what the proper channels are.

Good luck with that, and I'm sorry that you have no other options. It's always heartbreaking to have to deal with a situation like that.

Answer 7

why the hell would you want to???? i have a 14 yr old and i am a single mother he is a pain in the *** a lot of the time but one thing he knows I WILL NEVER GIVE UP ON HIM.... if its not just a teen thing then take a look into what your doing in parenting i know that ive done a lot of soul serching finding all my son needed wasw MORE ME!!!!!!!

Answer 8

Call the law on him for stealing and i am sure that they will be more than happy to take him in and put him in a juvenile home.

Answer 9

Because of his age and the fact he will soon be 18 it will be almost impossible.

Answer 10

If you were to call Child Protective Services about him , could they take your daughter,too? I dunno. The cops let you down. They should have taken him to juvie. My old boyfriend destroyed my property in our house, and I pressed charges. He got hauled off.