I have become friends with a lady at my sons play group. I have known her for 8 months now but we are still at the stage where you can not be totally honest. The problem is she smells so bad I dont know if I can keep quiet for too much longer. Does she really not know?? I really value her frienship as she is the kindest person I have ever met. How can I tell her without hurting her?? Please help.
2007-03-07 19:53:46 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
This is a real tricky one. I would tell her in the gentlest way possible. I remember a girl I used to work with used to smell, and my colleague pulled her to the side quietly and said 'if you are going home for lunch today, it might be best if you shower up and put on some deodorant' In this particular case it worked, as this girl did not know and was grateful. But it's tricky because this friend of yours may not react so favourably. I would chance it and tell her, because if she already knows and can't help it, she will tell you, and if she doesn't know, she will appreciate your honesty rather than have you talk behind her back. Hope this helps, Penny xx
2007-03-07 20:01:50 · answer #1 · answered by Vanessa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She definately needs to know, unless she does and is hopeing people won't notice. It depends on why she smells. If it is her normal body odor purfumes can help. Maybe take her on a shopping spre and stop at a perfume shop and help her find that scent that works for her. If she smells bad because she has a colestimy bag ( hope I spelled that right) then there isn't too much to be done. If that is the case I'm sure she does her best to cover up the odor, but it's a nasty side effect of stopping colon cancer from killing you. The purfume option still might help if she can get someones opinion on what works better than what she uses already. Also some people beleive in being 'all natural' and don't want to use artificial stuff. If that is the case there are all natural perfumes and such out there that you could introduce her to.
2007-03-08 04:03:00 · answer #2 · answered by Malcolm L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would gently pull her aside and tell her that some "other" people were complaining about her "problem". Tell her you value her as a person & that you find her to be a very kind individual and that you really feel uncomfortable with telling her this. But tell her she is developing a certain problem with other people that could be cleared up, and maybe she's not aware of it. If she says she doesn't have the means to buy hygiene items, tell her you will go out and buy them for her as a gift. Then tell her, again, that you care for her & don't want to see her get hurt or made fun of.
2007-03-08 04:01:32 · answer #3 · answered by gone 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perfume won't do it that's just a cover over the stench. Get her a nice gift basket of soaps as an appreciation of her friendship. Once you've presented it bring up a the smell of a specific item and say how great it smells. That way you're kind of hinting to her what you what to smell when you see her next time.
2007-03-08 04:06:59 · answer #4 · answered by cashew 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send her an anonymous letter telling her. Say it in a nice way so she knows its not some jerk just being mean or she wont take it seriously. Make sure you cover your tracks so she doesnt know it was you.
She might ask you about it and if she does you can be honest with her then about the fact she smells.
2007-03-08 03:57:36 · answer #5 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First ask yourself, "Do you really want to cross this line?" We are talking about something really personal here. This is going to give you access in her life you've never had before. If you are, you can talk to her about this guy that one of your friends talked to you about that smells and your friend doesn't know how to deal with it and wants your opinion...or any story that you want but don't dwell on it. or she'll find out that its her. Change the topic right away. We don't want to 'push her',.. just a little 'nudge'.
2007-03-08 04:24:51 · answer #6 · answered by icantgetaname73 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could meet up with her smelling bad yourself and start up a saying "I'm sorry that I smell so bad, I forgot to use the only deodorant that works for me". Then tell her what it is and ask her if she ever uses it.
2007-03-08 04:04:52 · answer #7 · answered by solotrovo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just pretend to talk about you using a new product called "XX deo" which smells so good that alot of people ask you for the name of the fragrance. Get her interest and she might just buy it.
2007-03-08 03:57:03 · answer #8 · answered by happy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Frankly, that is a tough situation....
If I were you, I will find a chance to send her a gift... which like the a gift set or something... which included perfume, powder, Deodorant... etc.
Just hope she get the picture...
Don't just send her the Deodorant, it is kind of embarrassing
2007-03-08 03:59:57 · answer #9 · answered by Tom ' J ' 1980 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell her exactly the following line... I apologize if I seem forward but I must speak my mind. I have no intention to offend anyone but is it possible that you could put some perfume when you are coming to work? If not, thank you again for listening.
2007-03-08 03:58:38 · answer #10 · answered by COBAN 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋