Ive just ended an 8 year relationship with my partner due to infidelity.?

Question

I can't be bothered being angry with him but simply don't want to be with him anymore. I feel like i need to be angry so he doesn't think i'm accepting of what he's done. I just want to talk normally & nicely with him & organise the children without any fuss. Is it ok not to be mad with him? We are not living together anymore. I know it sounds like a stupid question. I have no desire to be with him anymore.

Answer 1

I feel exactly the same way about my husband. I feel I should be angry - but I'm not. Surely, I was shocked and disappointed about his infidelities, but not angry as such. Sometimes I wish I was furious, so I would have acted upon it and got out a lot sooner. Why I'm not angry still remains a mystery to me, but my theory is maybe the voice of reason and the desire to be amicable overrides the anger? Or perhaps you 'divorced' him emotionally some time ago? The fact that you're not angry is really a good thing - it is far better to be amicable rather than bitter and twisted. And no, it's not a stupid question at all. Hope this sheds some light, kind regards, Penny xxx

Answer 2

It was over years ago. If a "relationship" drags on past three years without a solid lifetime commitment, it usually fails even if there's a marriage. You have no reason to be angry because you didn't want the commitment either. You only wanted to play act at having a family, and this is how it ends.

Answer 3

Hi...in time- things'll ease up...

Here are a few ideas:
Give yourself a chance to go through the feelings you are going through and process your emotions. You can be upset and angry -but still be civil...it just takes tact. I suggest keeping a journal or either recording the feelings you possess -so you can visit and revisit them. Also, it is a good way of releasing them without fighting...As you progress to healing and letting go of this issue- it would do your soul good to view in reading how far you have come...

Hope it works out for you and your children!

Answer 4

Yes it is perfectly fine not to be angry with him.You know the marriage is over, what is the point of anger.Shows your putting your children first.He is the father of your children and was a big part of your life.Who says you shouldn't be civil.Your not accepting what has happened, your moving on.Good luck with your future, your a strong woman and a great role model to your children.

Answer 5

You aredoing what is best for the kids by not being mad in front of him and the kids. When you are by your self scream and yell at him at the top of your lungs till your horse. Then have a good cry. Then beat the hell out of a pillow. You need to express your anger in some way or it will eat you up inside.

Answer 6

i am sorry but it appears a hasty decision from a well thinking personality
unless one is convinced that some one beliefs are going to effect others especially children and wife such a hard drastic action should not be taken
even if it hurts others a way out to avoid such situations could be detailed out
this is i am sorry no solution

Answer 7

good for you
no use living a lie or continuous agro
you will feel better as time goes on
get on with your life and find an honest relationship

anger is a waste of time and energy
much better to be civil about it ,

Answer 8

You sound like you just have accepted it. Make sure you get tested for STDs and HIV/AIDS.

Answer 9

its perfectly ok to feel dat u shldnt press matters nemore...and dat u both shld move on in life....for ur kids.....but dnt start trusting him again...unless and until he is sorry/regrets wot he did....

Answer 10

there's nothing wrong with not wanting any drama