It hurts when good friends change because our marriage broke up...?

Question

does it happen to you or anyone?

Answer 1

It may hurt, but put yourself in their situation. They've known you (possibly for years) as a couple, hung out with you together, talked with you together, shared things with you together, and now you're asking them to forget that you two were ever together.
A lot of times, in messy divorces, friends get caught in the middle, and instead of being forced to choose sides, they back off entirely. At times, they may take sides, and it may be a side which you never expected. When my sister's husband filed for divorce (completely out of the blue), his best friend became one of the people who supported her and helped her through it, because he knew that his (former) best friend was wrong.
A lot of times, when a divorce occurs, people aren't sure what to say or do. People in the broken marriage are often very stressed out, high strung, and easily offended (and rightfully so -- you've been through a lot!). This really can scare people away... not knowing which jokes are okay to say anymore, or what seemingly innocent thing can set you off and make you angry or sad. It's hard, and a lot of people aren't up for dealing with those kinds of emotions, so they disappear for awhile until the dust settles. Remember those who do stick around -- those are your true friends!

Answer 2

I cannot imagine a scenario where good friends do not change.

I know that my exwife, not only lost all of her friends, but she lost her 2 best friends whenever she cheated and left me. She tried to maintain a relationship with her two best friends, but they were close enough to me that they could not forgive her and continue to hang out with her.

On the flipside, I was very close to a girl that one of my best friends married. Matter of fact, her and I were so close that whenever she left him, I was the first person that she called. To this day, as much as I love her and miss her, she broke a promise that she made to me, him and everyone else that ever cared about her, on top of the fact that she was probably cheating too. ..but, in the end, nothing I MEAN NOTHING trumps the golden man rule of BROS BEFORE H#*S...so it is what it is.

Good Luck