ok im 20 yrs old, i have a little girl shes a yr and 7 months..her dad left us about 6 months ago (im 8 months pregnant) he left us for an older woman, shes 32 and hes 22.... :( sad huh well the thing is he still tries to have sex with me i say no ofcourse but part of me thinks that if i let maybe he'll come back, i dont know why i even want him back he left us with all sorts of bills and didnt care to help...i didnt even tell him he had to go he chose to go live with her, she knew i was pregnant and that we had a little girl and she didnt care, i dont know how their could be people out there who dont care if they ruin families, she says im obssed and need mental help that i need to go to college and get a job, shes retarted i did go to school and i do have a job i work at a hospital as a medical assistant, she on the other hand works at a damn bank, i guess the point of me writting this is because i want advice on getting him out of my head, i dont want to love him anymore...
2007-03-07 16:40:19 · 9 answers · asked by nahdya21 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Going through a situation like this can be more difficult then losing someone to death. The reason being is the person you loved and cherished walked away from you, your kids and the life you created with him, and he moved on with no responsibilites, with death there is closure, with a cheating man there is none. First things first, you are not the problem. Do not get caught up in thinking if you had been different done something different ect that he would still be there because it is him with the problem. Second, as hard as it is now, he did you a favor. He is not trustworth, not responsible, and not accountable for his actions. You deserve the best and honey he aint it. Thirdly, if he still solicits sex from you he sees you only as an object to satisfy his lust, not someone he loves. Sounds like he doesn't even love himself, and the guilt he carries will catch up to him for what he has done to you. Move on, look forward to the birth of your child, be proud that you are a good parent, and the future is still bright for you. As far as the other woman, she has to live with the fact that she is dating a cheater, and she will one day be 42 and he will move on to greener younger pastures. Even though it seems as if they are happy, believe me, when the newness wares off, she will be driving him nuts with questions on his where abouts because she knows he capable of cheating. You will survive, and love remember is something that doesn't hurt you. If it does, it's not real love. Good luck.
2007-03-07 17:04:19 · answer #1 · answered by Shyler 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let's go find a wonderful man who can handle childrens. He maybe 32. he could be working at hospital or in the bank. LMAO!
Your baby dad is sound like "a boy" to me...he can't deal with a new family and left family for other female who has jobs and an older.
But remember, He will leave her when she get pregnant! You are still young and a wonderful mother of 2 childrens. There is more men you could choice and be with one who can take care of you and childrens. Go Girl!
2007-03-08 00:58:40 · answer #2 · answered by foxxmay2001 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know of course that it will take time to get him out of your head but you can do it. He's left you and it would not be wise to have anything else to do with him on the level he wants.You know he'd run back and forth between you and the 'other'. See that he handles his financial responsibility. There are a variety of emotions you can feel from a situation of this sort.
Be patient with yourself. He's 22 and she's 32. She is going to dump him when she meets someone mature and closer to her age. He'll need you when his ego needs stroking. He will be back ; whether you will take him back is another matter. In the meantime, plan for the future for you and your kids. As of now,you are all they have. You are strong enough to handle what you are experiencing, if you weren't God would not have allowed it, ( although He did NOT tell your boyfriend to abandon you ). You and your kids will be fine and you will be blessed.
2007-03-08 01:13:16 · answer #3 · answered by LORD BALTIMORE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetheart find yourself a babysitter and go out for a night on the town, dance with a few boys and let your hair down. I don't know the man but by reading your story i can't help but think he is an immature selfish little prick that is not ready nor may he ever be ready to be a man and take care of his own. Don't worry though my wife was in a similar situation when i met her you do need to pick the future men in your life carefully because they will effect not only you but your baby's as well.. anyway change your number and kick that looser to the curb. you'll be fine.
2007-03-08 01:31:51 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
situation isn't that bad at 20. though u shud have thought twice before getting into this, u don't even need to think once to get out of it! stop thinking of him. whenever his thoughts start gulfing ur mind, replace them with those of ur daughter and the kid to be. don't think of ur spoilt present, just think of how best can u gift wrap the future of ur kids. daughter is a best gift a woman can have and u are lucky to have one already. so u don't have to worry about a best friend in life. make urself an example for ur kids and enjoy life with them. as for the woman in his life, nobody can build a home ruining the homes of others. it is lust which has no future, trust me. at 20, u've already seen the worst part of life....so be sure, the best is on its way. pray God, feel the strength of prayer within and face life. remember, 'the ship is safe when it is anchored, but that is not what it is meant for' so go ahead and face life. take care of ur life and ur life will take care of u.....gud luck, happy women's day!!
2007-03-08 01:01:24 · answer #5 · answered by Muvi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't control how you feel so easily, but you can control what you do. You know that you need to let him go and move on, and you stick to it because over time you will heal and overcome this and pick yourself up and move on. You know you deserve to be treated well. Over time, the feelings will change and all of this won't consume you anymore. Take care.
2007-03-08 01:10:19 · answer #6 · answered by Paul 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He left you with two kids.... still tries to use you for a sex toy.... and you STILL cant get him out of your head?
Does he have legal custody of your girl? If not - no reason to have him anywhere near any of you. Change the locks, change your #, and don't let him near any of you.
If you just let him get away with it - you're valuing yourself at $0 - and you will get bought for that price repeatedly in life..... Time to stand up and be a mom!
2007-03-08 00:46:43 · answer #7 · answered by going_crazy_30m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dump this loser. This prick is worse than me. He is not responsible because he only thinks with his little head.
2007-03-08 00:47:40 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay away from him...
Go to court and get child support...
2007-03-08 01:23:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋