We where married for 12 years and we have two boys 6&10 together. I had an affair at work and wanted to stay with my new lover. Its been about 4 months since we parted. We share our boys every other week together. We always call the boys at the other parents house every night. When my ex calls here after he is done asking about their day and stuff he tells them about 4 childrens jokes a piece. He has been doing this since I left him. The kids really look forward to him calling and really enjoy the kids jokes. I feel that he is sending me a message like "I'm a joke for cheating on him and breaking up the family" Is this wrong for me to think like this? PS he wasn't a bad husband its just that he got a little boring.
2007-03-07 15:22:19 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are asking if your ex is rude for telling his children jokes?......And you cheated on him????!!! Wow, I have heard it all now! You are lucky your kids even speak to you or are OKI enough to even laugh at jokes. Hon, you have issues.
2007-03-07 15:27:21 · answer #1 · answered by theartisttwin 5 · 4⤊ 1⤋
First of all not to preach, you left your husband because he was boring? Not a real good reason. If the worst thing he is doing is telling the kids jokes, then I would call him a saint in the ex husband world. You took his family and children from him. The fact that you think these jokes are about you make me think you are a little narcisstic, or self centered. Life should be about your children and what is best for them. You have not set a good example by cheating on their father. Whom ever you are with now will eventually become boring as you spend time with him. All relationships are exciting because they are new and different. I feel bad for your kids. I feel bad for your ex husband because he deserved a woman who would be faithfull. A man who's wife cheats has a good chance of winning custody of his children, just be glad he isn't pursuing that route and be thankfull he is still trying to be a father to his children. Don't make everything about you and your needs and wants, or in time everyone will get bored with you and you will find yourself alone.
2007-03-07 15:32:20 · answer #2 · answered by Shyler 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
They say the hardest thing in divorce is how bad it hurts the kids..for using a excuse for cheating saying he was boring is a poor poor excuse...being a good husband and father is the main thing in a marriage...and him telling the children jokes is ok...he is trying to make them feel better...you broke up the kids family...don't stop him from trying to help them out and being a good father...And I bet down the road the new will wear off the old will shine threw...and you won't feel the same about your new lover...The grass is never green on the other side...when you get there you find out it's astro turf...
2007-03-07 15:39:40 · answer #3 · answered by hononegah1988 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is not sending you a message he is parenting his kids, and sounds like he is doing a darn fine job of it. You said " feel that he is sending me a message like "I'm a joke for cheating on him and breaking up the family" Is this wrong for me to think like this?" Sounds like some well placed guilt of your part! You decided that your family and "good husband" {who obviously is also a great father!} was not exciting enough for you. Hope you like the sex, because you have tossed so much more that mattered!
Enjoy your life and lay off your husband, you were the one with the issue! He was a victim to your infidelity as were your kids.
2007-03-07 15:30:53 · answer #4 · answered by Roll_Tide! 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
On a more personal level.. There could be a number of reasons that he does it. He could be trying to make himself feel better, by joking around.. thinking "happy thoughts." And by hearing his children laugh, could be a way of coping with the seperation. Another reason is that maybe he feels inadaquet as a father for the past (for whatever reason).. so he does what he can to show his children that he is a fun and great person. OR.. once again, maybe he's like a "new daddy," and doesn't know what to expect.. so by joking around with his children, is the way he communicates with them, because he's unsure what to say to them at their age. To some fathers, it's easy for them to say, "Hey sport, lets go play catch," or.. "hey kiddo! What's been going on?".. some parents (MOMS and DADS) have a strange way to communicate with their children, being scared of what they may think of them. But then again, there is the other aspect, he could be making jokes, and secretly pointing them at you. (As you said.) But if he's an adult, hopefully he's just trying to deal with the seperation in the "good," way, and trying to be there for the children. Anything and everything is possible.. Maybe you should ask him. Straight out. (But that could end up ugly.) Your call.. "The ball is in your court!" Good luck.
2007-03-07 15:35:30 · answer #5 · answered by broken_anjil 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like someone who wants to keep a healthy relationship with his sons is alright with me. Does your "new lover" do anything more besides give you a good phuck?
You sound like an insecure pathetic loser woman. You are a joke, "He just got a little boring". I would joke about your sorry a s s every chance I got because you are a joke. Did you hear about the paranoid insecure woman who came on Yahoo answers and looked for sympathy? Yeah, she isa skank and a joke.
2007-03-07 15:42:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like that to me. Sounds like he started the jokes and since the kids like them so much he continues with them. As long as he isn't saying something like "why did the cheating mother cross the street?" You know? I wouldn't worry too much. You kinda have to take things from your ex with a grain of salt. I'm sure he's bitter and upset, not to mention jealous but it doesn't sound like he's doing anything to bad mouth you. Feel lucky about that, it could be worse, much worse, trust me I live it! Just enjoy your life and adore your children and all will be good!
Take Care,
Tori
2007-03-07 15:41:56 · answer #7 · answered by Incognito 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow you sound really paranoid! wonder why?? hahaha But you do have the right paranoid idea. Because personally I think what you did was uncalled for. Your not the best roll model for the boys. Ya that last line about he wasn't a bad husband, just boring. WOW that only makes you sound even MORE SELFISH!
2007-03-07 15:30:33 · answer #8 · answered by SecretFriend 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
nope nothing wrong with ex-hubby, so has to be you who made the poor choice thinking grass greener on other side of fence. You ran out on your kids also, so now you have a guilt about your ex being he tell the kids jokes. If too hot in the kitchen , get out, you made a poor lust decision
2007-03-07 15:36:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No he isn't wrong and I think you are not thinking in right way. He is just trying to make kids happy and you should not take it persoally as more you trying to find a reason to blame him you will see everything he is doing in wrong way so stop ding that and try to work it throught to make kids life comfortable. Let kids to be happy and donot try to put your nose into what he is talking to kids and what kids were talking to him as I am sure that would help to improve your relationship. Not only with your ex but also with kids and kids will find situation much more stressfree and will be happy.
2007-03-07 15:29:21 · answer #10 · answered by Spartan Total Warrior 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He is just joking with his kids. You are just feeling guilty because you know what you did was wrong. He probably doesn't think that you are a joke and isn't laughing at what you did to break up the family.
You would see criticism anywhere because you feel that you deserve it.
2007-03-07 15:50:52 · answer #11 · answered by John B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋