Im about to have a baby girl, I am concerned with the moral values...?

Question

in the society.
The secret of a good self-esteem and success in life is following our hearts, in other words being virtuous (like being honest, respectful, tolerant, trustwhorty, kind etc, etc)
I just moved to the US, and I find the media very shallow, I am concerned with the sick humor, lack of conscience (like having sex as a means of pleasure not a way of communicating love), lack of kindness (racism), superficiality (thinking success is gaining material goods, idolatrizing beauty and talent instead of character)
I am concerned because no matter how much good examples I give I know that a big influence is the community in which she is going to grow up, a child has to be raised by the entire society not by an adult alone and to be encouraged by the examples of others also.
I need to know if the media is this country's reality or children can truly be nurtured spiritually by the society.

Answer 1

I had the same concerns when I came to this country thirty years ago and I'm really pleased about how our children have grown into happy adults. However, as parents we had no particular strategy.

I have puzzled about the reasons we moved here. I don't think they were at all obvious. Certainly we were welcomed here and had every opportunity to materially prosper but that wasn't it.

I had always been impressed by the freedom in this country. OK, I had grown up in a developed democracy but there was not the same acceptance of individuality. In fact individuality was stifled by conformity and I knew I needed to be where I could responsibly determine my own behavior. I knew I could trust myself to make better decisions about myself than anyone else!

Without any planning, I think this is what happened with the kids. They observed their parents and their parent's family's behavior and also that of their friends and their friends families and made their own decisions about what was important to them. Quite accidentally we taught them to trust themselves.

Now, I don't think they are perfect people. They struggle in their lives and will have to learn from their mistakes but they have an inner strength that demands admiration.

Every concern you mention was one for me. As I look back on it, I might have been just too busy taking responsibility for myself to have had time or energy to take responsibility for all that for them as well!

Answer 2

It is scary - I have 2 girls. I think you will be a huge factor in your child's moral development, so don't discount that. You can turn off and/or limit tv (v chip for older kids). PBS is good - no commercials. You can surround your child with loving people who are good examples & limit her exposure as much as possible to racism, bigotry, commercialism. Of course you can't entirely prevent her exposure to the ugly things in life, but you can offer her your viewpoints & keep the lines of communication open with her & explain to her why you feel the way you do. I think your daughter will be beautiful on the inside & out & spiritual, too b/c you seem that way, and as the saying goes, "the apple doesn't fall far from the tree." Enjoy your little bundle! Congrats & good luck!

Answer 3

Religion and you can help. Dont shelter your child or when she gets older she wont understand the world around her. She will learn your thoughts and feelings about people and society and as long as you dont push them on her they will always be with her. There is no way to say that your child will never see these things. Just teach her that they are wrong and teach her your thoughts of love and caring and such. She has to learn on her own though. Dont shelter her. Her love for you will make her always come back to how she was first taught.

Answer 4

HI

I truely believe it takes a village to raise a child..but the family needs to choose the village...

Here are some suggestions...on how to raise a good child

1. The family (parents mostly) needs to set firm by fair boundaries for their children. They need to know where that child is at all time, they need to be a constant figure in their life...during the good times, bad times and in between...they need to be their child's friend..but most of all....Parent!

2. There are ways to monitor what your child watches on television..do not put a tv in their bedroom..only have one tv and have it in the living room/family room or in your bedroom...

3. you can put tv stoppers on some channels...the channels you wish your child not to have access to..etc

and lastly..my mom use to say to us growing up..show me your friends and i will tell you what you are..(ie if you have good friends you will stay good)...children learn from example...you need to be the role model...live your life how you want your child to live theirs..you are your child's first teacher....lead by example...

good luck!

there are good people in this world...don't let a few bruised apples ruin the tree....

Answer 5

No, the media is not this country's reality, although sometimes it does come close.

But as a parent you can make one hell of a difference. For example, my mother is French, and I grew up with her and my dad in central Pennsylvania. My mother didnt agree with alot of things in the American media, so we had a TV, but didnt have cable. So we could still watch movies and such.

And you know what? It didnt kill any of us to not have cable. And I'd even go as far as to say that its actually a good thing to not have cable or TV period during the early years of childhood (first six years or so).

Answer 6

this is in response to my question, in which you called me a moron. in which i asked about a white america....my question was based on fact that non-white commit way more crime, etc than whites. it was a question for you to answer. not bash me. because i'm not a racist or anything. you have to get morals in ur head first, before you ever think about a kid. you were so off base with you answer with me, that you should be ashamed of urself. just because someone ask the question. doesnt always mean that is there belief. that's why people ask questions.curiosity didn't kill this cat......

welcome to america! wipe ur feet and stay awhile. aslong as ur legal. :) o and please get back with me on this matter. ur not fit right now to be a parent....

Answer 7

"He says that because of the fact it is likewise his toddler he could get to return to a determination." it particularly is no longer the way it particularly works, almost or legally. it is your physique. it is your physique which will create that existence, or it particularly is going to likely be your physique that endures a technique to end that existence. His physique isn't affected in any way. subsequently, he has no say. Giving adult males the the main suitable option to make women have an abortion robs women of the rights to their very own bodies, and that's neither ethically or morally justifiable. "and because hes older he could make the main suitable determination... " Being older would not provide him a uterus, now does it? "He is likewise implying that he will injury up with me if i don't have one." Which he ought to do. He would not provide you the possibility to make you have an abortion, yet he DOES provide you the possibility to in basic terms pay newborn help and not be in contact with the youngster in any respect. "i pick help determining on words to assert to him without breaking apart with him to precise the magnitude of no longer removing my toddler. i could additionally evaluate adoption till now abortion. " you are going to could come to a determination what's extra significant... boyfriend, or toddler? you could no longer have the potential to have the two. So come to a determination. Welcome to the grownup international of unfavorable judgements. whether you provide the toddler up for adoption, you will probable nonetheless injury up. no longer many couples who provide a toddler up for adoption stay mutually, because of the fact the previous they proportion is in simple terms too painful. So like I stated, toddler or boyfriend. What the boyfriend needs is almost irrelevant... like I stated, it is your physique and your existence, and you could make this determination as though he wasn't interior the photograph. in case you do come to a determination to place the youngster up for adoption, he will could consent because of the fact the organic and organic father. yet i'm guessing that should not be a situation.

Answer 8

My brothers having a kid soon, and i'm worried about how they'll grow up. But i guess you just have to trust your child to do the right thing.

You raise her or him with the correct morals, and your child will take it from there!

Answer 9

Instill in your daughter what is good and proper; teach her common sense and self respect, and respect for others. Inspire her to learn all she can in school & college, and she will be alright. Remember that the world will kepp on changing, and we will change with it, if we like it or not.

Answer 10

You are right about all those things, just try your hardest you sound like you know the right things to teach her. Good Luck.