Please help!!! i need a real (educated answer) very, very important to me!?

Question

I'M CURRENTLY MARRIED(IN CALIFORNIA) AND I HAVE A 5 MONTHS OLD DAUGHTER, ACCORDING TO THE STATE LAW DO I KEEP MY DAUGHER OR MY HASBAND IF WE GET DIVORCED? AND CAN I MOVE TO ANOTHER STATE WITH MY DAUGHTER?
DO MOTHER ALWAYS GETS TO KEEP HER CHILD OR NOT? WHAT ARE MY OPTIONS? AND CHANCES THAT MY DAUGHTER WILL STAY WITH ME?

Answer 1

you need to contact family court. you cant just take your child to another state. the father has rights too. the judge or mediator will decide what is best for the child and to who it will live with. if you prove to have a better stable home than your ex, then chances are good that your daughter will stay with you, but if you have a track record of inappropriate behaviors (ex: actions like britney spears), then she will not be with you, and you will need to prove your a fit parent. if you take off with her that is kidnapping even though shes your daughter. its the way the law works.

Answer 2

Normally the mother does get to keep custody of the child while you are separated pending a divorce being finalized. But, the father can petition the court for custody of the child. If the mother is considered an "unfit" mother, i.e.- child abuse, drug usage, child abandonment, etc, then the father may be granted custody. While separated, you work out a visitation schedule, such as father gets child every other weekend, etc, just depends on what the two parties agree on or what the judge rules. The custodial parent can move out of state. Also, there will be a determination of child support that the non-custodial parent will have to pay. The amount of child support is based upon wages of non-custodial parent. Unless you have issues where you could be seen as an unfit parent, then the way laws are written and interpreted, then you should have no problem retaining custody of your child. One more thing and I don't know if this situation applies in your case but if a spouse is abusive and there is documentation of this, then a restraining order can be granted and visitation of the non-custodial parent could be supervised. Hope this information helps you. By the way, I have left an undesirable situation despite threats made by my ex that he would take my child away, that was 12 years ago and I still retain sole custody.

Answer 3

Usually the mother gets custody of the child, unless it is proven that the mother is unable to care for the child. I would highly recommend NOT moving out of the state because it will seem as if you are deliberately trying to keep your daughter away from your husband and he may in turn use that against you!
Stay in the state, talk to a lawyer. Both you and your husband needs to come to an agreement about how you will go about this (or the court will order something). And you need to STICK to that agreement, or that can also be used against you.
You may have made a mistake marrying whoever this guy is, but all that matters anymore is the welfare of your daughter and that means having contact both parents. There are too many kids now who don't have contact with both parents.

If you are in a situation where you are in fear of your life, you need to call the police or the abuse hotline. However, I still would not leave the state because it would make custody a difficult process.

Answer 4

Usually the mother will keep the child after a divorce. But the father can keep the mother and child in the state if he is the biological father. If he is abusive to you or your daughter, then more than likely the court will let you have your daughter AND allow you to move from the state, maybe granting a restraining order.

Answer 5

You will need to consult with a professional Attorney who specializes in the area of Child Custody. You will need to fish around for an excellent attorney with a rep for winning cases! not losses. Schedule an appointment with a paralegal and explain, without going into too much detail over the phone, that you are in need of an attorney regarding child custody.

Since your daughter is only 5 months, It will depend on the Magistrate, (Judge). He will base his decision on you and your husbands assests, employment, and stability after the divorce. The judge will ask you both, how are you going to provide for this child if and when you two decide to divorce?

Who will take care of the child when you have to go to work? Will it be a family member, a close friend, or a child care agency? He will ask you and your husband, what kind of living arrangements will be made to accommodate your 5 month old child.

Normally, and traditionally, the children are awarded to the mother, but, if your husband wants custody as well, then, most likely, you both will have to remain in the same State or agree to relocate to another State. But, you would both have to prove that you have set up accommodations, jobs, and stability if that were so.

But, my advice to you is, get in touch with a good attorney and take it from there. Talk to a few para's over the phone and feel out which one you think my suit you during court. Check out the attorney's credentials, references, make sure he is licensed in your county and state, bar , ect...

Try not to rush into the divorce, wait until you have a job set up and a stable home, because you will need to prove that you have these things to provide for your infant.

I wish you well..try to keep the divorce on a friendly basis, not messy..it makes it worst on the both of you..it will appear to the Judge that you both are incapable of being awarded custody of your child. Play by the rules..you both should consider the best for your child.

After all, she needs both mommy and daddy!

Answer 6

It depends on the agreement you and your husband reach when you divorce. This is not something you should do without a lawyer, BTW. I've seen many women get shafted who didn't have lawyers in divorce cases. Whether or not you get custody depends on your case - the court usually favors giving the mother primary custody, but will look at who can best house, clothe, feed, care for the kids on a daily basis when setting custody and child support. Whether or not you can move to another state depends on things like visitation - if your husband has visitation rights, it's difficult to get permission to move out of state because it makes it almost impossible for him to see your daughter, although courts will sometimes allow it if you can prove it would be a hardship not to move. Again, this is not something you can do without a lawyer.

Answer 7

Mothers do not always get to keep their child.
There will be a custody hearing to determine who gets the child. Chances are if you and your husband are both good people, joint custody will be awarded.
If your husband has some issues, you may be awarded custody and he'll have visitation rights.
I dont know the rules about moving out of state, but if you intend to move far enough away to where your husband would have trouble seeing her, that would be pretty cruel. Your daughter needs you both.
Get a good lawyer, keep records of everything, and dont do anything that would be deemed questionable in the eyes of the court, and your chances of having sole custody of your daughter are much higher! Good luck!

Answer 8

Mothers don't always get custody. If you are still married you have to look into the separation laws in YOUR state. Most places make you have a legal separation before you can get a divorce, and them with kids you can't just pack up and leave the other person out of the picture ~~ unless you can prove they are abusive in some way, or incompetent.

Answer 9

In California, the presumption is joint custody. Yes even for babies. You will split time with her, especially if she is not breastfeeding. As far as moving to another state, I'm not sure. There are no current custody papers saying that you can't but you cannot withhold your daughter from him if he comes after her. Actually, when the father's go to trial, the fathers usually win. It's awful. Good luck. If there is any domestic violence involved, call a hotline. Either way, you must speak with an attorney about your specific case.

Don't do anything without preparation (unless you are fleeing for your life). Plan everything in advance in conjunction with the advice of a good female-orientated attorney, it's your only hope. For a good one, call domestic violence places and see who they recommend.

Answer 10

In most US states, the mother is awarded the child, even though most of the time, the separating parents have joint custody. At least until the child is not of "tender" age, they usually go with Mom. However, that can depend on if he can prove you are an unfit mother. Don't care for, or neglect your child, or cannot provide for your child. Regardless, you will not (most likely) be able to leave the state without the father's consent without going to court. (Unless you can prove he's a dangerous person.)