we both work full time and split all the bills equal 50/50.we live in a condo complex that does all the "outdoor work" for us(mowing,repairs ect)plus they will fix anything that goes wrong inside too.my bf would never think to wash his own clothes and will complain when something he wants is dirty rather than just wash it himself.trying to get him to help get groceries will almost allways end in a fight.on the weekend he gets to go play golf,play with his son ect as our complex does all the "mens work".yes i have tryed to ask for help but he allways has an excuse i'm tired,i'll do it later,ect and it never gets done.what can i do i feel like i spend all my free time cleaning up after both of us.
2007-03-07 10:36:09 · 9 answers · asked by jennymartin67 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well, if you weren't sleeping together, this would sound like a Mother complaining about her lazy teen. The reason for that, is that at home, he's living like a lazy teen, except he gets to have his girlfriend in bed every night. You shop, clean, cook, do laundry, and pay half the bills. He takes care of- - - - what???? And you are you real??? Goodness, what can I do? I don't dare ask him to help, because he gets soooo upset. Lady, while you don't have testicles, it's time to grow some. You either behave like an equal partner AND grownup, or you continue living as a doormat. You have allowed him to behave this way, so you are just as guilty as him. FIGHT. Stand up for YOU. Housework should be done by both of you. No, he isn't going to like that. Tough. This issue should be a deal breaker. Or, if he wants an old fashioned marriage, quit working and be a full time house wife. He can work two jobs to replace your income, and you can stay home, growing flowers, taking care of the house, and whipping up home cooked meals. Now, you are working the two jobs, house wife AND wage earner. You'd be crazy not to change this.
2007-03-07 11:15:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say stop doing things for him. then when he has no clean clothes and his crap is everywhere, maybe he'll get off his butt and help you. If you are both working full time and the bills are 50/50, the housework needs to be 50/50 as well. If he get smad, he gets mad. If nothing changes you need to ask yourself if you want to continue on in a relationship with a man that takes you for granted. It will only get worse as time goes on.
Good Luck!
2007-03-07 10:42:27 · answer #2 · answered by Tracie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop doing everything and see how long it takes him to notice. Then tell him you need his help doing these things because you spend all your free time doing it.
If he really hates doing a certain thing, like groceries, tell him you'll do that if he does something else (laundry, washes dishes, etc.)
You could try making a list of chores and discussing it with him to agree on who should do what.
2007-03-07 10:45:15 · answer #3 · answered by dream_girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U know what?..........Its never going to change unless you put your foot down and make it change.
If both of you are working fulltime thers NO excuses for the household duties cannot be halved.........thats just him being lazy and selfish!
Maybe you could hire a house cleaner and start spending some of the income towards that?.....that could shake him up?............if hes not going to help out then why should you?
2007-03-07 10:56:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do men Like , love or want more then anything? SEX,SEX, SEX....Right? well what i would do get some construction paper cut out some squares and for instance on one write 1 free strip tease for you if you sweep the floor or if you wipe down all tables and tv we do position of your choice, give him a little boost
2007-03-07 13:22:51 · answer #5 · answered by laci 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats what being married to a guy is like ... my guy does the dirty work .. but just because i refuse to do it. for example, if you want him to take out the trash .. just don't take it out and let it pile up .. he will eventually get the hint.
2007-03-07 10:41:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he has been doing this for 5 years you probably won't change him now.
2007-03-07 10:42:28 · answer #7 · answered by breezy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
make a list of thing to do for both of you.
2007-03-07 10:39:59 · answer #8 · answered by Free-Lance 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get married.......why have you been engaged for 5yrs......something is wrong with that picture
2007-03-07 11:00:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋