I've found that the more questions I answer my friends with honesty, the more they think I'm being a total *****. They ask if I like their hair, if I don't... GOD! Billie, you need to lighten up. Because your hair is ugly? I think not... Also, why do people ask questions that force me to voice my opinion if they don't want m true opion on the matter? Do people honestly ask questions... to be lied to? I personally cannot stand a liar, why should I become one? To make someone feel better about their ugly hair?
2007-03-07 08:51:33 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Although none of us have ANY idea on HOW you delivered the truthful message, I suspect that you might not have been as tactful as you could have.
Effective command and delivery of language has, is and will remain the pinnacle of a successful person.
Look at former President Bill Clinton.
This guy could get away with murder...because he can deliver the message in a way that is appealing.
Get my point?
So, again, I don't know HOW you told your friends, but consider working on the WAY you do it.
2007-03-07 08:59:11 · answer #1 · answered by docscholl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think people are asking questions to be LIED too. You need to read between the lines. If your friend asks if you like her hair. She's probably asking for reassurance that she looks okay. You don't need to lie but you don't need to be brutally truthful. You could say, it's not what I would chose but it seems to suit you. You could even resort to it's very unique or unusual. Or change the subject and compliment on what does look good. "I really like that dress".
It's called people skills not lying.
My daughter and I discussed this and it also depends on where it is asked. If she's just outside the door of the party it's not a good time to tell her it looks bad. But if you are home and the party is hours away you could say I don't like it, do you? Let's try another style before we go.
2007-03-07 17:05:57 · answer #2 · answered by Karrose 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're right, people are like this. They want to hear what they want to hear. Who cares if their hair is full of webs and rat nests... they wanna hear, "Dang girl, your hair be lookin' good!"
The best thing is to be honest even if it hurts... BUT, be careful with the words you use.... THe tone and the words you pick to state an opinion makes all the difference in the world. Be honest, but be polite and nice.
Its better to say, "I'd go for a less orange color" than "Dang! Looks like you're carrying a big carrot on your head!" You see?
2007-03-07 17:02:34 · answer #3 · answered by Java Chip 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What kind of friend says hurtful things? You know the appropriate response is to tell a tactful lie. Or put things more gently. Over-opinionated, rude people who pride themselves on their honesty make me sick.
2007-03-07 17:02:30 · answer #4 · answered by littlechrismary 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i totally agree with you that happened to me sooooo many times people are acting like such a *****!! if they dont want true answers why bother asking them in the first place!
2007-03-07 16:55:32 · answer #5 · answered by Deleted! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know what you mean some people just need people to lie to them to feel better about them self's but if every one just told the truth no one would have to feel bad i don't really get it!
2007-03-07 16:58:42 · answer #6 · answered by car crash hearts 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If they ask and you answer honestly, you are NOT being a bitc*. Period.
If they don't ask, that's something else...
2007-03-07 16:55:32 · answer #7 · answered by scruffy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋