A little breathing room please!!.(strict parents)?

Question

In my opinion my parents are verry strict. Im fifteen years old, and have never been in trouble. I mean neever. No detentions, referals, suspensions, I have a 3.8 gpa, never drank, smoked, done drugs, i dont have a myspace. So why are my parents sooo strict??....I realize that it is their job to protect me and all...but i feel like im being suffocated. Im fifteen years old (16 in June)and have to go to bead at like 10:00...Thats soo stupid. Most of my friends are definately still awake by then. I feel like the baby of the bunch when it comes to my friends, yet im the oldest. I will be old enough to drive in a few months , and stiiilll no permit. Just the thought of not being able to drive is depressing. And Im not aloud to date until im 17. Thats just down right stupid. ALL of my friends have boyfriends..and i dont. I just want to be able to do every thing that my friends do!..Is that soo bad?..Any tips on how to get them to lighten up?.TIPS?....I REALLY need help. Thanks:

Answer 1

okay i do agree that ur parents are a little bit too strict, BUT i understand why they are like this. You sound like a responsible teen. I think u need to sit down with ur parents. present ur case in a reasonable and very adult way, and this may help them understand. do it only a little at a time. ur 15, let me tell u, i just turned 18 and got my license yesterday. it took my parents a year to get the time to even teach me how to drive (i had my permit til the day it expired. the bedtime, well ask them to gradually let u stay up later as long as u can get up in the morning and it doesnt affect ur grades. Honestly i wish i could go to sleep at 10 every night but i have a 3 year old to take of and she goes to sleep at 830 and wakes up a few times everynight. the boyfriend situation. ask them if u can start dating at 16 instead of 17. i KNOW i started dating too early, and now i have a 3 year old to take care of (i had to get my GED) Don't expect them to let u do EVERYTHING ur friends do, honestly i bet some of ur friend's parents should be a little more strict with them. remember that ur parents just want the best for u. Also when u ask for something and they say no. DO NOT whine and complain. maybe ask just for an explaination of why not and be very adult about it. and they will treat u like an adult

Answer 2

I know you want tips on how to get them to lighten up but hear me out. I'm 18 and I still have a 9:30 curfew on school nights... I to am a good kid, I'm graduating in May with honors and I've never came home drunk or even ever been drunk. I don't smoke anything or do any other drug. Your parents mean well but they still see you as their baby. Don't worry about the boyfriend thing trust me guys are overrated at 15. I, by choice, didn't start dating until i was 17 and I'm so grateful. I was mature enough to handle the situations I was put into and get through them. When most of my friends were not. Now I've had a steady boyfriend for a year and he has recently became my fiance (he's 22). You need to talk to your parents. The only thing you can do is to try to reason with them. Try out a conversation that is lax and easy going. Like guys I'm almost 16 then name off all your good points (like that 3.8 GPA). Make promises that you will be able to keep, like I promise not to let my grades slip. And I'll still do my chores. Good Luck

Answer 3

This is coming from a "strict" parent-- I would say that the main reason you *are* a good girl so far, is because your parents have done a great job with their "strict" upbringing. Believe me-- everyone else who gets to do the stuff you wish you could do...? Their parents aren't nearly as involved in their lives. Do they know who their kids' friends are? Where they are when they're out later than what you can stay out? Do they *care*? Or do they just figure it's all good until the cops show up?

Try this-- make a list of the changes you'd like to see in your life. Pick something that's important to you-- maybe the bedtime. Talk to your parents and tell them how you're feeling, and that you'd like a chance to prove you're responsible enough for a few more privileges AND the responsibilities that come with them. Staying up later means being responsible for getting yourself up and NOT sleeping in come morning. If there's a guy you'd like to date, ask if they will allow him to come over for dinner or a movie night under their watchful eyes. When you've shown initiative, intelligence, thoughfulness, and a sense of responsibility, they will be forced to see what a mature young woman you've become-- and they can look back with pride on being so involved in your becoming so! Everyone wins. :)

Best of luck to you. I think my almost-14 y/o could have written your question, minus the dating & learner's permit! LOL But she's a very good girl, and I believe we're on the right track with this "strict" parenting business... ;)

Answer 4

My dear.............. your a good kid, and them being strict kept you in line. They want you to be the best you can be, and you are living up to it. When you have kids you will see what they did for you was a blessing. They do not want you to ruin your life by doing stupid things.

about dating......... dear read though this sight, see how many 11-17 yr old girls are pregnant, wanting to keep them, or asking about abortions....... that is why they impose a bedtime, and dont want you to rush into dating. Think about it. You have 3 more years about of time under their roof, just keep doing what your doing......

I was beat aa a child. I had to do ALL the cooking and cleaning because my mom was lazy. I was 15. I had to be in bed at 10:00 home by 9:00 if i was at a ball game, and we all know they arent over until 10:00 never saw the end. I had a good GPA, and If i was every 2 mins late I was called a slut and asked who I was out dropping my pants for.... ( I wasnt sexually active) So be thankful for Them being strict not abusive.

Do you know how many kids there are in the world that their parents dont care what they are doing........... who they are with, dont care if they attend school?

Answer 5

That's pretty harsh
Talk to them, tell them your not a little kid anymore
I know what its like, not on the rules part but the strict part
If i missed one day of school, unless i was sick i would get beaten and grounded for a month
But i think them now that im 17, im doing well while my old friends are all drop outs
Trust me, parents may seem harsh and even hatefull, like they're trying to ruin your life, but most of the time they're trying to protect you from the evils of this world
But anyways heres a list of things you can try

- Talk with them
- Get a part time job
- if you have younger brothers/sisters offer to babysit them
- DO NOT compare them with others parents, trust me thats a NO !
- Do not make it look like your kissing up to them
- Driving isnt so great, i got my learners at 15 but i still prefer to walk

Answer 6

I had much stricter parents than my friends did too--and that was in much safer years. I do know how it feels to not be allowed to do what everyone else can.

Now, as a parent myself, I can see what my parents were worried about. My children have gotten into various types of trouble--with their friends who I really thought were 'good' kids.

You should feel grateful that your parents want to protect you from all the bad things that are happening these days. It is a much different world than when I was young. There are drive-bys, many more teen pregnancies, drug/alcohol use/abuse, STDs (especially HIV/AIDS--which didn't exist when I was young), many more drunk driving fatalities, etc. Remember, that some parents don't really care too much about their children--or are too busy with work/stress to know what their children are doing.

Hang in there--it's not too much longer that you'll be a kid--enjoy it, you will never have a carefree life again once you're older. :)

Answer 7

You turned out to be the fine person you are, because of their rules. When I was your age, my bed time was 10:00 also. My parents knew I had to be rested and ready for school the next day. Take a really close look at your friends. I know it's hard to watch them having all this freedom, but what are they like? Do they use drugs, drink, smoke, make good grades?

Answer 8

My son is 16 and during school nights he is in bed at 10:30 but weekends he has no bedtime. He also has a 4.0 grade average and has never been in trouble either. BUT I can say he has alot of freedom that I never had growing up. This summer he will be getting his drivers liscense and car. We pretty much let him do what he wants- such as going to friends houses-movies- mall and so on. I can call him any time on his cell and he has to call and check in with me by text or call atleast once while he is gone so I dont worry! Oh sweetheart- trust me as a mom- its so much all out of LOVE that your parents r doing things the way they r doing! They love you so much and want to protect you from that big bad world out there! You r their baby and always will be- even at 30 years old! lol Talk to your parents together- tell them exactly how u feel- tell them exactly what u told us- tell them everything in your heart! They dont sound like bad parents just cuz you have a bed time! They just want you well rested for school! Your grades wouldnt be half as good if u stayed up till 3 am on the computer yapping- u would be too tired! smile! Some of his friends run hog wild until midnight and 2 am on school nights and as good as my son is- NO WAY! Theres too many weirdos out there who would love the chance to mess with a teen! One day you will have a daughter and you WILL understand! In the meantime- talk to them and let them know you r trust worthy- Im sure they know u r a great kid! Start small and ask for bedtime to be 10:30! Extended curfew on weekends as long as u call and check in. But be honest with them and u will be surprised how far it will get u! But remember- its all out of love sweetheart!

Answer 9

Point out to your parents that it not like you ever get into trouble,You need some freedom and responsibility.How are you supposed to be responsible if your not given the opportunity?you are a teenager so be a teenager.Tell them that you don't want to miss out on all the fun because when you get older you won't have time to have fun because you will be working all the time.Just be honest with them.Ask them to put themselves into your shoes.And you do the same,try to understand where they are coming from.Maybe see if all of you can come up with some kind of compromise.Good luck I hope this helps.

Answer 10

It sounds like you are very responsible for a 15 yr old so congrats, talk to your parents about it. Maybe little steps at a time like let you stay up later as long as your homework is done and so on Good luck and god bless.