I was seperated from my husband and began having relationship with someone that ended I felt some strong feeling for him and think about him everyday even though Im back with my husband...do these feelings go away? If so how long will it take?
2007-03-07 07:27:54 · 28 answers · asked by memyslf&I 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is the price you pay when you give up the goods easily to a variety of dudes. I hope it was worth it.
2007-03-07 07:31:02 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 4⤋
Love never goes away on its own. If you love someone, you love them---but if you let it rule your life, then love becomes your master. You must not let it rule you, but take into your mind the logical standpoint of your situation. If you are with your husband, you stayed with him for a reason: either you saw something in him, or fincially speaking, or whatever the reason is, you made your choice. If you go back on it now, you could end up in a situation that is much worse than what you are in today.
You must take it day by day. You must be honest with yourself, and you must keep your eyes and your mind open. Love doesn't go away, but the pain that you are feeling will fade from a sharp, stab to a dull throb. There is no telling how long it may take, my friend. You just must learn to master love, and take it one day at a time.
I wish I could help you more.
and in honesty, you did not cheat on your husband. You were seperated. Which means that in any moment, there could have been a divorce. Do not listen to the bitter replies people may say to you.
Good luck to you, and I hope you find this bit of advice a bit comforting and at least a bit helpful.
2007-03-12 17:10:40 · answer #2 · answered by Tapanga 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will never really go away, do you love your husband as much as did before you met this man. Put it this way , do you love your husband , period. if you still think of this man everyday and wished you were with him , then you have a lot of heartache in store for you. You can't live with another man longing for someone else and be happy, did you go back to your husband because of children, do you have children?. Does this man love you , does he still call you. I'm going get a lot of heat for this but you have one life to live and when you dead your dead a long, long, time. I feel your life is your own and if you are deeply in love with this other man, go for it if he feels the same. You can't live with a man loving another, it just don't workout. You will grow to hating your husband because you feel he is you keeping from getting the love you want and need. That is up to you but don't ever, ever stay in a loveless marriage just because you feel sorry for husband or you have kids. if you do that it will never work out and this other man may be gone and found another, so go for it.
2007-03-07 15:47:13 · answer #3 · answered by Nicki 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever been driving and developed "tunnel vision" where all you see is the road ahead? You need to get to that place with your marriage. Focus on your relationship with your husband and rebuilding your marriage until the other guy just dissappears. Your feelings towards this other man are like a mosquito bite- the more you scratch, the more they'll itch. Pay no attention to them and they'll stop bothering you.
Remember: love is a verb. It's not how you feel that matters, it's what you DO. Behave in a loving way and the love will follow.
2007-03-07 15:39:29 · answer #4 · answered by craftladyteresa 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Think back to people whom you have loved a lot in your life (your husband probably isn't the first person you loved). When you think about those people, do you still feel strong affection? Sure. So that's the way it will be. It doesn't mean that of all the people you've loved, this is going to be one that stops you from going forward and enjoying life.
2007-03-15 11:02:15 · answer #5 · answered by kathyw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, the love will go away if you want to stay and be with your husband and keep him as number one. If you use the second man as a way of enchanting and fantasizing you when your husband does something you don't like then it will take a long time. That's why you should not separate cause your mind will be filled with baggage.
2007-03-15 14:43:28 · answer #6 · answered by Diesel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nothing wrong with having feelings for the next man I'm not married but been in a relationship with the same man for 9 years and i still have feelings for my first love i think about him everyday that don't mean i want to be with him or every time i see him i want to drop my panties no its only feelings big deal don't let your feelings get the best of you keep them good and everything should be just fine continue to live your life with your husband and if those feelings should just leave then let them go but i think you will always have feelings for him especially if he was special to you not all men are special good luck and don't let you feelings get you down its nothing to worry about take care
2007-03-14 13:24:34 · answer #7 · answered by laverne j 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It can go away with time, but the amount of time it will take is different for every person and every situation. Look at the bigger picture and who makes you the happiest. I always use the 10 rule in every big decision I make. How will it affect my life in 10 minutes. . .in 10 days. . .in 10 months. . .in 10 years?
I've always heard the saying " If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it does not, it was never meant to be."
2007-03-15 12:02:02 · answer #8 · answered by Jennifer W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think about him 24/7 (literally) then they probably won't go away for a while.
If you think about him ocassionally through out the day, then you're in much better shape. Just will yourself to let it go. Set your heart officially on your husband. Every time you think of this guy, recognize that you're thinking about it and STOP. Do something to get your ming off him. You have to CHOOSE to let him go before feelings go away.
2007-03-07 15:33:16 · answer #9 · answered by :-) 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well....since the feelings you had for your husband went away enough to have another relationship, I think it's fair to say that these feelings will go away too.
2007-03-14 15:48:27 · answer #10 · answered by Vix 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love never goes away if there is a flame that glows. I had the same thing happen and that was along time ago. I still think that I should have stayed with the person I was seeing.
2007-03-15 00:36:26 · answer #11 · answered by yogi 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋