I just read a question that made me think. What happens when "good" people (people who usually have good characteristics and morals) with "bad" spouses cheat? What do you think the circumstances are that they don't leave before it gets to that point? By the way NO IT IS NOT ME! Don't address this question like I cheated with a married man (or your man) because I'm not. I don't like sharing!
2007-03-07 06:42:31 · 12 answers · asked by Snowflake 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That's easy,because they search for someone who fullfills their needs that their partner isn't giving them. They look at it as a bandage, something to give them comfort while they are still married. Also it could be the co-dependancy factor, having lined someone up before you dump who you are with.
2007-03-07 06:49:31 · answer #1 · answered by St.Jeb 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Your question is kind of confusing, but it have big point to it. Let's see what describes this "good person" and if there are any at all. People with good characteristics and morals can make mistakes too, they wont do these mistakes on purpose and with no conscience. But mistake is a mistake, and even though their spouses may be bad they still feel like they done something wrong. Now the bad ones are the ones that keep doing it with no worries, no regrets, no conscience, no fault. Thats really the only difference between two. Also we may ask how come good ones become like bad ones? Well hey sometimes people get fed up with stuff and other people hurting then and they feel like they need to get even and do the same thing. On other hand there who are just fed up and spaz out, and once they spaz out on the whole wide world they just stop believing in their good characteristics and morals and eventually become bad.
When it comes to circumstances, then i say it can be anything beginning with lack of attention and care from their partners, ending with cheating and just plain old cheating. Sometime thats all it takes and before they break up with that person they get to that stage when the become a bad guy too, and only then they decide they waste their time on hidden revenge (their changed behavior and morals that make them do bad thing) and just finally decide to break up with that person.
Hope i didnt confuse anyone and hope i made at least a lil bit of sense. ;)
2007-03-07 07:14:43 · answer #2 · answered by BK thang 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Well, I just asked a question about forgiving your spouse and I forgot to mention that it wasn't for me. So good call on your question, I asked because if I was put in that situation, I don't think I would be able to ever forgive my husband and I'd probably leave to a distant country if I had to. I have a friend who keeps coming over because she's finding it very difficult to stay in her relationship with my hubby's best friend. I try to console her but I can't find it in me to say to her "forgive him and move on". Frankly, I feel she should leave. This is not something you should ever forgive. I know bible says forgive as you want to be forgiven, but you are so right....
What makes a good person stay???
When is enough, enough??? How can you live with the knowledge that your husband has been with someone else, while he was with you??
2007-03-07 06:59:16 · answer #3 · answered by inland102 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It begs a question of how "good" people end up with "bad" spouses to begin with. I subscribe to the "tell me who your friend is, and I'll tell you who you are" mentality; we choose people we hang out with, build friendships and relationships with, or marry. Very few people are "good" or "bad" unquestionably - even those who do the most unspeakable evil often act this way at least partially as a result of certain genetic/biological factors which are beyond their control. In most of us, "good" and "bad" are mixed together. We cut corners, tell white lies, and fudge on our taxes all the time - c'mon. I don't care how "good" you are - if you have a "bad" spouse, the choice was yours and yours alone to make; your spouse is a reflection of you. If what reflects in the mirror is ugly, doesn't mean the mirror's broken.
2007-03-07 07:01:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
It is immoral to cheat. At the very least it is a huge lapse in judgment and a person who professes to have morals knows it's wrong. By going ahead and cheating, this so-called "good" person has compromised her (or his) morals and is now wallowing in the slime along with her "bad" spouse.
2007-03-07 06:48:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
i think most women cheat because they feel they aren't getting enough attention or affection from their spouse.... and some may have lost respect for their spouse for some reason, so they seek comfort elsewhere?
i'm not a man, so i am not sure why they cheat.... maybe it's because it's in their nature to "spread their seed" so to speak... it's exciting for them?
2007-03-07 06:54:25 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, I agree with Charli. Good people cheat when their forced to.
2007-03-07 06:57:05 · answer #7 · answered by MISTY 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
maybe for convenience its easier to stay married while hiding an affair, if ur successful in keeping it secret, than to file for and go through a divorce and then pursue someone else. as terrible as it sounds i think its true
2007-03-07 06:46:30 · answer #8 · answered by charli_red1218 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Happens all the time and they don't leave before it happens because they are too scared to.
2007-03-07 06:46:13 · answer #9 · answered by Jewel 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Hi
I think it is because they are afraid to be alone .
C
2007-03-07 07:05:48 · answer #10 · answered by Constance M 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋